Miscellaneous: Today, I noticed that my new shampoo had an unfamiliar pink color...

By shampoomice - 07/08/2013 16:34 - United States - La Porte

Today, I noticed that my new shampoo had an unfamiliar pink color to it. After some investigation, I found a dead mouse that had apparently cut itself on the bottle pump. I've been washing my hair with mouse blood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 861

You deserved it 5 429

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By hantavirus - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I found out that the horrific smell coming from somewhere in my kitchen was a rotting dead mouse that somehow got stuck in my dishwasher. I have been eating off plates washed in dead mouse water for the past week. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 356

You deserved it 11 510

By umyuck - 03/05/2015 16:55 - United States - Norfolk

Today, I noticed my shower drain wasn't draining well. I cleaned it out, thinking it was just a rat's nest of hair. Wrong. It was an actual dead rat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 499

You deserved it 2 518

By Anonymous - 05/10/2014 17:04 - United States - Louisville

Today, I woke up to a mouse sitting on my pillow and chewing on my hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 642

You deserved it 3 729

By Ewwwwww - 04/02/2010 18:53 - United States

Today, I discovered that the rancid stench in my bathroom was a decaying carcass of a mouse in my toilet tank. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 742

You deserved it 3 350

By SummersEve - 12/02/2010 00:47 - United States

Today, I found out the crappy shampoo I've been borrowing from my girlfriend is actually "feminine wash." FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 722

You deserved it 33 338

By Anonymous - 27/01/2013 06:10 - United States - Batesville

Today, I decided to change my hair color. After waiting in anticipation, I took a shower to rinse out the dye and reveal my new, blue hair. Rinsing revealed not only blue hair, but blue skin caused by the watered dye running over my body. I now look like a smurf, and it's not coming out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 456

You deserved it 42 605

By Anonymous - 18/11/2009 04:08 - United States

Today, my water wouldn't go down my shower drain. Confused, I stuck a metal stick expecting hair, but instead stabbed and pulled up a rat that was dead in my drain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 982

You deserved it 2 472

By Giggity - 21/02/2011 19:20 - United States

Today, I found out that the mysterious smell from under my bed was my cats collection of dead mice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 370

You deserved it 6 519

By mayoshampoo - 01/09/2014 16:59 - Canada - Toronto

Today, someone, and I still can't figure out who, switched my shampoo with mayonnaise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 650

You deserved it 4 037

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By MouserMan - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - Canada - Olds

Today, after emptying the dishwasher, I noticed something in the back by the drain. It looked like a turkey bone. Upon closer inspection, it was a mouse carcass. I have no idea how many loads of dishes have gone through with it in there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 566

You deserved it 4 394

SwaggCapone 11

Thursday 8 August 2013 0:07

That's nasty! *Cleveland voice*

engineerosaurus 26

Thursday 8 August 2013 0:07

Extra protein?

Comments

Zebediabolical 39

Thursday 8 August 2013 0:22

Did it work?

supernaturalcat 12

Thursday 8 August 2013 0:24

That was one determined mouse

Obey_StudBoii 23

Thursday 8 August 2013 0:30

Nothing like extra protein lol.

evan_7899 28

Thursday 8 August 2013 0:32

How did the mouse cut itself on the pump, are you sharpening it to make a plot to mildly cut your husband

justindrew14 29

Thursday 8 August 2013 0:32

ewww u need to fix that

FrostyKittens 24

Thursday 8 August 2013 0:33

So metal

TheJordanBryant 11

Thursday 8 August 2013 9:04

Wow.

BMTHsuperfan 18

Thursday 8 August 2013 0:35

who needs keratin treatments when you've got fresh mouse blood?

cottoncandymango 17

Thursday 8 August 2013 0:36

I'd be scarred for life. Get your house inspected for rodents and such.

yourmurderscenex 13

Thursday 8 August 2013 4:01

No need to get inspected. its already obvious that there are indeed rodents.

aron666 25

Thursday 8 August 2013 0:37

According to ancient belief, blood has some special healing power.

47twixbars 13

Thursday 8 August 2013 1:24

Tell that to the poor mouse.

worldclassrager 39

Thursday 8 August 2013 0:37

Now my stomach is churning...why did I finish reading this? Well you have the smell of the hunt...until it runs out...and I advise some mousetraps..,

Keywords

Miscellaneous Family Cats DIY Awkward Management Poopoo peepee Work Am I overreacting? Capitalism Relatable Coworkers Frustration ADHD Dogs Animals Transportation Dating Love Health Anxiety Technology Mental health Sleep Noise Roommate Clumsy Confused AITA Parents

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Today, my neighbour from across the road phoned me at work telling me there was a fire engine outside my house and a lot of smoke. I drove home in a panic, smashing a rear light on a post and getting flashed by a speed camera. It wasn't my house. The firemen were putting out a bonfire next door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 856

You deserved it 6 630

Today, my boss is going nuts after some coworkers quit, as they were some of the lucky few with enough cash to move away ahead of whatever dumbass plan the next administration has for their immigrant families and friends. My boss is complaining he can't afford to pay "normal people wages" and wants me to work overtime. FML

I agree, your life sucks 442

You deserved it 166

The Top

Today, I spent hours making an elaborate bird feeder for my backyard. It was finally ready, and I proudly hung it up, imagining the birds chirping happily. Instead, a squirrel discovered it within minutes, devoured all the birdseed, and then gave me a smug look before knocking the feeder to the ground. FML

I agree, your life sucks 398

You deserved it 155

Today, my car was totaled. It was so new, I haven't even made the first payment on it yet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 702

You deserved it 592

Today, while having a break up fight with my fiancée, she informed me that the paternity of our unborn child was in question because one of the other guys couldn't remember if he got off or not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 489

You deserved it 264

Today, while singing Happy Birthday to my husband, I desperately needed to fart. I couldn't leave the room, so I let it out real slow. There were over 20 of us there, yet somehow my mother-in-law knew it was me. She went over to the window and opened it wide, all while glaring at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 140

You deserved it 4 062

Today, I discovered my first wrinkle at the same time as my millionth zit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 148

You deserved it 172

Today, I hacked into my best friend's Facebook account to message my mother about organizing a surprise party for myself for my 21st. She ignored the message for two days before replying, "I don't think so. No one would really show up and I think that would hurt her feelings." FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 582

You deserved it 20 542

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