Kids: Today, I overheard a little girl ask her mom if the round lady... - FML

By Anonymous - 10/03/2011 22:28 - United States

Today, I overheard a little girl ask her mom if the round lady in purple was pretending to be a giant eggplant. I was the lady in purple. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 267

You deserved it 9 663

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Same thing different taste

Sorry dude

By EatYourGreens - 21/08/2021 06:01 - Australia - Augustine Heights

Today, my four year-old very loudly asked me if the little person she saw at the shops was like that because he didn't eat his vegetables. He definitely heard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 866

You deserved it 149

By Anonymous - 31/12/2011 06:21 - United States

Today, as I was just finishing my grocery shopping, a little girl and her mother walked past. Seeing the little girl staring at me, I waved. The girl then pointed to me and asked her mother "Mommy, is that man pregnant?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 864

You deserved it 7 312

By cganon - 21/09/2010 12:44 - United Kingdom

Today, I was in a store when a child looked at me and said to his mother "look at that tall man!" His mother replied "he's an evil giant isn't he, darling?" I then mimed being an evil giant to make the kid laugh. His mother slapped me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 684

You deserved it 5 029

Snek

By Ksweety_fml - 01/08/2019 02:00

Today, somebody in a store was talking about a girl who had a snake, and while I was walking out the store, an old lady asked me if I was the girl with the snake. I said no, to which she replied, "Oh, because you look like someone who would." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 418

You deserved it 258

By Redhead4life - 18/03/2012 00:48 - United States - Miami

Today, a little girl looked at me and yelled "Mommy look, there's a real leprechaun!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 883

You deserved it 2 885

Mambo number 6

By n/a - 25/11/2009 07:36 - United States

Today, I was working at a children's play centre, and my stomach was twisting and turning. Thinking no one was around, I let out a small fart, only to turn and see a little girl running to her mom, yelling, "Mommy! Mommy! That lady just farted and it sounded like daddy!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 125

You deserved it 27 545

By Anonymous - 11/09/2013 18:10 - United States - Miami

Today, after having recently told my 4-year-old daughter that she won't grow big and tall if she doesn't eat her veggies, she decided to pass this wisdom on to a midget that we passed in the store. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 178

You deserved it 10 071

Helpful

By Big bootay - 28/01/2019 16:00

Today, while at a restaurant, my 4 year-old son pointed at a lady and exclaimed, “Mom, her butt is even bigger than yours!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 225

You deserved it 360

By Black Cat 13 - 04/09/2010 06:52 - United States

Today, at work, a little girl was misbehaving. Her dad told her that she would look like me when she grows up. The little girl look horrified while Daddy laughed and kept reassuring her he was "just kidding." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 137

You deserved it 3 515

Check this out!

By Anonymous - 10/08/2015 00:37 - United States - Plano

Today, I went to the store with my 4-year-old daughter. While I was trying to change into tight jeans, which weren't completely on, my daughter opened the curtain and yelled, "It's the Mommy Show!" Everyone there heard her and saw me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 811

You deserved it 2 556

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Top comments

ViolentBears 0

Friday 11 March 2011 1:12

Were you pretending to be an eggplant? I don't think your disguise was good enough cause she didn't fall for it.

dmndrby789 0

Friday 11 March 2011 1:13

kids say the darnest things lol

Comments

jordanprodigy023 0

Friday 11 March 2011 1:15

Lose some weight and the problem is solved

squeaker07 15

Friday 11 March 2011 1:18

awww poor op. Besides eggplants aren't that thick, some are lengthier and some are short and portly. It's just a little kid. What does a little kid know? lol

ImaginaryFoe 0

Friday 11 March 2011 3:37

Sure. Maybe the kid meant one of those Chinese eggplants. They are the supermodels of the vegetable world, not those anorexic celery stalks.

Ichiki 0

Friday 11 March 2011 1:19

Personally, I think most fat jokes are funny, even though it was leaning towards the truth in the kids opinion. Plus it's from a kid, how is that NOT funny? lol

DarkJoy_fml 5

Thursday 17 March 2011 11:48

"Hahahaha a stereotypical joke not about me is funny." I had a friend kill herself because people made fun of her weight fucktard!

Chibipanda 1

Friday 11 March 2011 1:19

Lmfao! XD little kids ftw!

BoldfaceMatteo 0

Friday 11 March 2011 1:23

that's kind of strange I thought you were fruity

noni123 0

Friday 11 March 2011 1:38

ahaha... I agree :P

Shorty_Shaza 5

Friday 11 March 2011 1:42

So..... you were Barney the purple dinosaur then? Lol JKs don't worry OP kids are kids and they will say anything that spings to mind lol

likeyourelooking 6

Friday 11 March 2011 1:50

errr ..... what?

marinus_fml 19

Friday 11 March 2011 1:50

You deserved it for wearing purple and trying to fool little kids.

1958x 6

Friday 11 March 2011 1:52

That's just pathetic if you're gonna get offended over something a child says.

likeyourelooking 6

Friday 11 March 2011 1:55

hahaha you saw that earlier too, eh? same message of "i like it but only sometimes, but not this time and honestly I never like it" what does that even mean!?

likeyourelooking 6

Friday 11 March 2011 2:00

Hmmmm this was supposed to be posted somewhere else. fail!

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The Top

Well. I must admit when I first received today's illustration, seeing the massive pliers pop out kind of freaked me out. Then I reached the last panel and I'm not sure if it's out of anxiety relief or what, but I laughed so hard I might have choked a...

I agree, your life sucks 0

You deserved it 0

Today, I have a stutter that gets worse with stress. We got a new supervisor today and the first thing she said to me was, “Either spit it out or write it in an email, for fuck's sake!” I’m now so scared of her, I go almost mute if we’re in the same room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 533

You deserved it 93

The Top

Today, I was laying in bed making out with a girl. After trying to figure out for a while why she was spending so much time on my neck it finally hit me. She was frantically and secretly trying to remove the gum she got stuck in my hair. She failed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 511

You deserved it 4 560

Today, I set out to clean the house while my wife was at work. Starting with the vacuum cleaner, it suddenly started making a strange noise and emitting a burning smell. Panicking, I unplugged it and noticed one of our toddler's socks had been sucked into it, causing it to overheat. I managed to extract the sock, but now our expensive vacuum cleaner is toast. FML

I agree, your life sucks 621

You deserved it 193

Today, my boyfriend got out of the shower and tried to hit my forehead with his penis. He slipped and slapped me in the eye with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 193

You deserved it 9 739

Today, I met my boyfriend’s family. His mother gave me expensive diamond earrings and treated us to brunch. I don’t know how I’m gonna have the heart to tell him that I’ve accidentally gotten pregnant from someone else I’ve been seeing. I can’t tell him it’s his because we haven’t slept together yet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64

You deserved it 1 965

Today, I was fooling around a bit with my girlfriend while cooking dinner when she said, "Don't get too excited, I want to watch The Princess and the Frog tonight." I just got cockblocked by a Disney movie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 779

You deserved it 7 376

Today, I was told I couldn't walk across the stage at my graduation because I owe money to lunch services. I owe 14 cents from my freshman year. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 513

You deserved it 1 737