Intimacy: Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would...

By IbetIgotAIDS - 12/09/2011 16:15 - United States

Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML

I agree, your life sucks 95 791

You deserved it 15 281

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

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Same thing different taste

By ekaay - 16/01/2018 15:00

Today, whilst cleaning the living room, I heard snickering coming from my bedroom. My two nephews had found my "play cupboard" and were blowing up condoms like balloons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 049

You deserved it 1 004

By frustrated - 17/08/2013 22:56 - Ireland - Killarney

Today, after a long and stressful day, I started fooling around with my boyfriend. When we finally got to the main event, I found out that we couldn't, because he'd used all his condoms to make water balloons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 146

You deserved it 7 411

By the_lonely_life - 27/06/2013 01:02 - United States

Today, I cleaned up my brother's room, since he's moved out. Under the bed I found a Doritos bag full of used condoms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 166

You deserved it 7 048

By kahemae44 - 27/10/2009 10:20 - United States

Today, I visited my boyfriend's house excited about the romantic night he promised me. As time passed, we started making out and heading up to his room. Rose petals and candles filled his room. "How romantic", I thought. That is, until we saw his 5 year old sister blowing up condom balloons. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 418

You deserved it 5 563

TMI FML

By eugh - 07/05/2021 14:01 - United States - Midlothian

Today, I discovered the brand of condoms my parents use. It was in the same grocery bag as my food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 781

You deserved it 576

By Anonymous - 13/02/2014 15:47 - United States - Kennett

Today, trying to be a responsible parent, I bought my daughter a pack of condoms in case she ever decided to have sex. She turned them into balloon animals and went back to playing video games. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 517

You deserved it 53 110

By ADickySituation - 05/05/2013 04:14 - United States - Wilmette

Today, my dumbass colleague was too lazy to go buy balloons for a party in recognition of our company's huge merger. Instead, he made condom balloons. Let's just say you don't make blow up condoms for a prestigious company event. A company whose CEO is named Dick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 876

You deserved it 4 938

Gross

By Anonymous - 02/03/2017 17:00 - Canada - Elora

Today, I was cleaning my older brother's room in my mom's house after he had just moved out with his girlfriend. I guess I was multitasking a little too much and not paying too much attention to what I was doing and I realized 15 seconds later, I was holding a used condom in my right hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 543

You deserved it 1 617

They grow up so fast these days…

By Anonymous - 11/07/2022 06:00

Today, my 5 year-old and I walked in on a girl giving her boyfriend a blow job in the washroom at the playground. Last week we found a crack pipe on the picnic table. So many conversations I wish we could have waited for… FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 257

You deserved it 166

By myself - 20/09/2012 07:00 - United States - Seaside

Today, my 2-year-old told me he found a new finger puppet. It was a used condom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 460

You deserved it 31 247

omegaxen 0

Monday 12 September 2011 22:57

That blows!

Hockey_fan 0

Monday 12 September 2011 23:00

Well that really sucks" That really "Dampened" your spirits That "blows" Well..we all seen it "Coming" ...I'm sorry

Comments

bramberkhout 10

Tuesday 13 September 2011 9:04

...wake up call

bossjanifer 0

Tuesday 13 September 2011 9:09

hahahhah! that's soo funny, best one yet!

cranker08 10

Tuesday 13 September 2011 9:13

Aww,, well hopefully not!

meowitzer 0

Tuesday 13 September 2011 9:35

This is probably one of the very best fml's I've ever read.

asheleigha 0

Tuesday 13 September 2011 9:54

Ew I would have barfed. :/ Some things should be left unknown in your case...

XxcrystaxX 4

Tuesday 13 September 2011 10:06

Ewwww fyl.

MrJojobinks 6

Tuesday 13 September 2011 10:20

That's sick!

tylenol123 0

Tuesday 13 September 2011 12:10

Ew :(

Ray_of_midnight 22

Tuesday 13 September 2011 12:15

Yeah, pretty much this. Hepatitis can live for a week or so, but otherwise, most of the microorganisms that transmit STDs don't live long outside a human host. That's why they're *sexually* transmitted diseases rather than being generally communicable. They require intimate person-to-person contact. Still, I'd get tested...if nothing else, to reassure yourself that you didn't catch anything. There's no peace of mind like that which comes from a negative STD test result. (ugh, meant this as a follow-up to #224...sorry about that)