Miscellaneous: Today, I rode my bike to the grocery store. I left my bike on...

By j - 04/06/2009 03:36 - Australia

Today, I rode my bike to the grocery store. I left my bike on the small bike rack they have outside the door. When I came out 5 minutes later I found someone had tied their enormous, growling German Shepard to the same rack. I had to wait for the owner to come out who then laughed at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 369

You deserved it 6 551

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 23/12/2016 09:19

Today, I saw a bike locked to a short bollard, making it very easy to steal. Being as nice as I am, I stayed, hoping the owner would come soon and no one else would take it. Then the guy who bullied me in highschool showed up, asked me what I was doing, laughed at me, took the bike, and left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 248

You deserved it 1 240

By cl512 - 18/09/2009 13:33 - United States

Today, I walked out of my college dorm to see that the intelligent person who locked their bike next to mine decided as an added security they would lock their bike to the rack, and to my bike. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 004

You deserved it 2 339

By getyourownbike - 12/05/2009 23:11 - United States

Today, I rode my bike to the store because I only had a few things to pick up. When I walked back out after five minutes, my bike was stolen. I had gone to the store to buy a new bike lock. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 810

You deserved it 12 922

Stranded

By i love stupid people - 14/07/2019 06:30

Today, I went on a 50 km bike ride with a friend. We stopped for a break halfway through, and locked our bikes up. When we returned, some guy had locked his bike to mine. We had to wait an hour for him to return. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 003

You deserved it 126

By brokeasscollegelife - 20/11/2015 21:25 - United States - Tallahassee

Today, I biked to the store to buy a new lock, since biking is my only form of transportation. I left my bike unattended for the last time, only to come back with a new chain, but no bike. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 657

You deserved it 3 458

By maybenot - 06/08/2012 23:25 - United Kingdom

Today, whilst on a cycling holiday, in a somewhat hungover state, I accidentally chained my bike to the back of someone else's caravan. As I walked away, I heard a loud scraping noise. I turned around and watched my bike get dragged down a long gravel road and through a pile of horse shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 828

You deserved it 29 952

Good boy

By Anonymous - 17/02/2013 06:01 - United States - New Bloomfield

Today, I was riding my bike, when I saw a large dog sitting in front of a house. I started to really crank the pedals, figuring that by the time it saw me, I'd be long gone. My chain popped off, I lost control and crashed onto the side of the road. The dog hadn't moved. It was a statue. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 436

You deserved it 21 063

This is how I roll

By Carrie P - 14/08/2024 20:00 - France - Lambesc

Today, I went out to where I'd parked my bike only to find that someone had stolen my bike seat. Not the bike, just the seat. I had to ride my bike two miles home in the rain like I was climbing a hill in the Tour de France, while other cyclists moved out of my way in confusion, all while trying to avoid me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 418

You deserved it 82

By HomeImprover - 02/11/2016 17:34

Today, I rode my newly-purchased bicycle to Lowe's to look at flooring and back splashes for our upcoming remodel. Upon leaving the store, I found out that my bicycle had been stolen by someone who had bought a hacksaw from that store while I was shopping. They left the receipt to mock me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 568

You deserved it 797

By MattVh - 12/01/2010 17:23 - Belgium

Today, someone had put a lock on my bike. While I was trying to saw it off, the police drove by. I was arrested for trying to steal a bike and released four hours later when they figured out that it was actually my bike. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 941

You deserved it 2 463

HeyThereGorgeous 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 12:46

German Shepherds are beautiful and sweet if trained correctly. Clearly this one wasn't

Tehalon 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 12:08

You gotta admit that it's funny :P

Comments

BaldOuting 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 15:31

I just saw cujo last night so I don't blame you for not going near the dog.

Shirou 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 15:31

Not really an FML.

Guairdean 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 15:35

Half a dozen Benadryl and some ground beef make a decent tranquilliser for a dog that size. The fun part is when the owner posts an FML about having to carry his mutt home over his shoulder.

jogabonito17 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 15:35

Idk how this is an FML. This one should go under the category of suck. Btw, it's a dog! If it bites you, you get rich... Easy as that.

wiltstay000 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 15:54

I don't see how this is an FML it sucks but it depends, did the other guy spend like 2 hours in the store then it would be an FML

MadeInCanada 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 15:55

Aww, I'm so sorry.. I guess this only applies to people who have cynophobia.. :3

davidtheday 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 16:11

I currently have four German Shepherds, and I've owned them all my life. I've never had a problem with them; they aren't usually an aggressive breed, unless someone mistreats them.

Xero3g 5

Thursday 4 June 2009 16:17

Don't be a pussy. I've fought large dogs before. A couple bites aren't all that bad.

Egorf 8

Thursday 4 June 2009 16:18

its not much of an FML, still funnny. are your sure you didn't get that from Reno 911

FreedomFirst 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 16:19

It's a German ShepHErd. Not an astronaut. Learn to spell. The owner was a jerk, though. Lots of people are afraid of dogs and shepherds are pretty territorial.