Miscellaneous: Today, I saw my neighbor's Christmas tree they had put up on...

By lebato97 - 09/12/2011 03:35 - United States

Today, I saw my neighbor's Christmas tree they had put up on their porch, with decorative presents under it. Being that my neighbors hate me, I figured I would take a present to piss them off. While walking back home with the present, I opened it. Inside it read "I knew you would, douche bag." FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 660

You deserved it 80 894

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 21/12/2011 02:01 - United States

Today, someone put dog turds underneath all the decorative reindeers' butts in my front yard. The chief suspect is my curmudgeonly, holidays-hating fuckball of a neighbor. Last week he repositioned them in very suggestive poses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 227

You deserved it 5 860

By Anonymous - 11/12/2010 20:49 - United States

Today, my family and I went Christmas tree shopping. My husband and I were walking around when I saw the perfect tree. Excited, we immediately bought it. When we got home and set it up, I realized it came with a present: termites. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 317

You deserved it 5 045

By Anon - 26/12/2015 02:03 - United States

Today, I thought my mom and I could put aside our differences and open our Christmas presents. When she opened mine, she turned to my dad and said she didn't want the present, so I could give it to someone else. 'Tis the season. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 552

You deserved it 1 394

Don't mind me

By Anonymous - 16/04/2012 12:38 - United States - West Palm Beach

Today, I watched as my neighbor walked to my front lawn, looked me right in the eye, and pissed on my mailbox. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 012

You deserved it 3 396

Christmas gifts

By not a thief - 24/12/2021 01:59

Today, while I was home sick from work, my neighbor got packages delivered. Our apartments have had a lot of thefts lately so, being neighborly, I brought her stuff inside to wait. When she came home, I gave them right to her. Instead of thanking me, she told the office that I was the thief all along. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 215

You deserved it 141

What was in the box?

By Anonymous - 29/09/2024 22:00 - United States - Burlington

Today, I got a notification that a package had been delivered. I opened my door and saw it on at doorstep. I was expecting one, so I grabbed and opened it, then realized it wasn’t mine, but my neighbor’s. I had to awkwardly re-tape it, then sneak over and leave the disturbing contents of the box on their porch before they noticed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 329

You deserved it 144

By moopymoplady - 29/11/2011 00:44 - Canada

Today, I saw Santa. He gave me the finger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 279

You deserved it 5 629

By Christmasloverandstuff - 25/12/2012 17:45 - United States

Today, my extended family came over for Christmas. I forgot to get a present for my extremely sensitive aunt. I took a gift from my re-gift pile and wrapped it quickly. Little did I remember that it was the same gift she gave me last year. She noticed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 903

You deserved it 42 524

By sucks_brah - 25/12/2009 07:25 - United States

Today, my mom got drunk and decided to unwrap all my Christmas gifts and throw them at the wall. Ho, ho, ho. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 290

You deserved it 2 514

By Cinderstar95 - 28/12/2016 09:34 - United States - Schererville

Today, my dad and brother found a Christmas present that they'd "forgotten" to give me. Expecting a joke, I apprehensively opened it. But I still wasn't prepared to unwrap the neck of the Christmas turkey. It had been rotting in the living room for 2 days. The smell was indescribable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 346

You deserved it 437

DFlit1 0

Friday 9 December 2011 8:59

Owned!

borkchop1992 15

Friday 9 December 2011 9:00

i bet your neighbors dont like you because you typically do douchy things like this

Comments

Angieboo227 0

Friday 9 December 2011 16:26

Ha! That's what your ass deserves!!!!

arlena95 0

Friday 9 December 2011 16:26

Omg lol that's awsum!!

maunaimer 6

Friday 9 December 2011 16:27

How is this a FML? You asked for it, and theres no possible argument against that. And if your that big of a douche bag, you definitely didn't get nearly what you deserved.

mikeymike96 7

Friday 9 December 2011 16:34

I'm not sure whether to say sucks for you, or your hilarious. I'd do the same anyway hahaha

j_cat187 19

Friday 9 December 2011 16:38

Has the grinch taught you anything? Go back and steal the tree, the presents, the lights, and that scrumptious roast-beast.

danielwilliams57 6

Friday 9 December 2011 16:40

You totally deserve it! Anyways, who does that kind of stuff?

DocBastard 38

Friday 9 December 2011 16:43

Llamacod, yes it is the same birthday. A birthday is the anniversary of the date of your birth. A birthdate is the actual day and year of your birth. If it's on the same day of the year, it's the same birthday. Stop trying so hard to correct people and look smart. When you try and fail, you end up looking even more foolish.