Health: Today, I slipped on a patch of ice and fell. I would have fallen...

By Soresack - 04/01/2010 13:34 - United States

Today, I slipped on a patch of ice and fell. I would have fallen straight onto my ass, but thankfully my testicles broke my fall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 620

You deserved it 3 200

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Same thing different taste

By Icy - 27/12/2009 08:43 - United States

Today, I was walking to the bus stop. I saw a chunk of ice and attempted to kick it. Sadly it was frozen to the ground, so I fell, broke my toe, and missed the bus. Even the bus driver was laughing as he drove by. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 667

You deserved it 29 985

By SqueakingRetard - 17/01/2014 23:28 - Canada - Barrie

Today, I was walking home from work, when I slipped and fell on a patch of ice. I clambered back to my feet, made it three feet, then slipped and fell again. A guy who'd witnessed the whole thing stuck his head out of his car window and yelled "Dumbasssssss!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 313

You deserved it 6 197

By WestboroBC - 03/02/2009 22:56 - United States

Today, I walked in the snow and saw some kid slip. I laughed and felt good about myself. Then I fell. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 437

You deserved it 72 422

By mus - 23/04/2019 04:00

Today, while walking to my bus stop, I saw a girl slip on black ice, then catch herself, and I laughed because people catching themselves slip are hilarious. I reach the same patch of black ice and go flying, falling on my hip and spilling my coffee all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 638

You deserved it 3 653

By Anonymous - 19/01/2015 22:07 - Canada - Brampton

Today, while walking to work, I sneezed so violently that I slipped on a patch of ice and hit the ground hard, badly spraining my shoulder. I lay there in agony as a pair of bystanders just stood there, laughing their asses off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 630

You deserved it 3 131

By This girl - 19/12/2011 18:01 - United States

Today, I was walking down the street, when I slipped and fell on a patch of ice. It wasn't all that embarrassing, until I walked two more feet and slipped again. The second time, a man pulled over and loudly asked if I was drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 321

You deserved it 3 389

Toot toot!

By Anonymous - 23/11/2022 18:00

Today, I slipped and fell on the ice while attending a community event for work. A man came to help me up, and I farted really loudly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 884

You deserved it 137

By holy sleet - 29/11/2013 21:49 - United States - Rochester

Today, while ice-skating with my girlfriend, I tried to do what they do in the movies and make her gently fall into my arms. Instead she slipped, fell, and hit her head on the ice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 773

You deserved it 41 769

By neveragain - 12/02/2016 19:10 - United Kingdom - Byfleet

Today, I ended up in the ER because I ruptured a testicle by accidentally sitting on it. Last time I ever go commando. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 593

You deserved it 4 651

Steady as she goes

By Slippin' - 17/11/2022 17:00 - United States - Steele

Today, I tried to walk on the sidewalk. Actually, it was so slippery that I had to shimmy across it. Then I shimmied too quickly and fell down. Now everything hurts. Maybe next time I should bring a sled. FML

I agree, your life sucks 628

You deserved it 143

ipodtoucher123 0

Monday 4 January 2010 20:12

u have balls on ur butt?

emilyjune519 0

Monday 4 January 2010 20:05

Hilarious. But ow.

Comments

onnielief 4

Wednesday 6 January 2010 22:03

That must have hurt like hell! whole new meaning to the phrase black and blue balls

cel123456789 0

Thursday 7 January 2010 3:07

how the **** did u fall on ur sack? lmfao

SEALMaster11 0

Thursday 7 January 2010 5:14

yeA testicles attached to ur ass is a blessing lol

kp56789 0

Thursday 7 January 2010 16:47

that's a nut buster!!!!

icanfloat12 0

Thursday 7 January 2010 23:29

his sack n balls r big so there under his ass

KingRDZ 0

Friday 8 January 2010 5:14

how do u fall on your balls?

mani10766 0

Sunday 10 January 2010 7:14

lol I'm a girl and I've been kicked in the crotch during a soccer game..... it hurts like hell. really.

manstie 1

Tuesday 12 January 2010 3:08

114 But you don't have the balls for extra pain...

Awilensky32 0

Monday 11 January 2010 3:54

yaa how the **** can u fall on your balls they must be like watermelons

eriinbaby 0

Tuesday 8 June 2010 3:26

hahah ouuuucchh!

tellmeastoryplz4 0

Thursday 19 August 2010 19:47

ice in arizona? I don't think so! this is such a fake ass fml!

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Today, I couldn't sleep because I had the worst time positioning myself around my cat who was sleeping in my bed. I couldn't kick my cat out of bed because I earlier today had an argument with my brother over which of us the cat loved more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 004

You deserved it 42 709

Today, my parents told me that unless I think about my behaviour and make some real changes, people are going to think I’m weird or suspicious, and I’ll never make friends. This is because I choose to attend church on Sundays instead of watching TV and getting drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 376

You deserved it 266

The Top

Today, I hit a new low point in my life when I stole batteries from a toy at the daycare I work at, and put them in my vibrator. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 893

You deserved it 39 848

Today, on the kitchen counter, there was a plate that had snacks on it. I decided to take a bite. I spat it out. Later on, my mother told me it was dog food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 205

You deserved it 791

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend when she started moaning and breathing heavily. I thought she was getting hot and was about to cum. Unfortunetly, she soon said, "I'm bored, let's play a board game." She was sighing, not moaning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 161

You deserved it 23 117

Today, I went on a walk with my family because I'm trying to be more active. We were near my son's school when I got a grumbling in my stomach. I rushed to find a place to take a dump. As I approached a Porta-Potty, my ass couldn't hold it any longer and I shit myself 20 feet away from the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 335

You deserved it 198

Today, I went to the OBGYN for my annual, and noticed they now supplied babywipes. After 3 seconds of "cleaning", the intense burning started. Turns out they were antibacterial bleach wipes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 053

You deserved it 32 412

Today, I got my braces in. I also got my period a week early. Tylenol can only help so much with the pain, but if I have something warm to eat/drink the wire tightens but my cramps aren't be as bad. I would have something cold, but we only have frozen meat and chunky ice cream, which I can't have. FML

I agree, your life sucks 692

You deserved it 124

Same thing different taste

Toot toot!

Steady as she goes

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