Love: Today, I sneaked into my girlfriend's house for some romantic...

By jester777 - 22/01/2011 17:39 - United States

Today, I sneaked into my girlfriend's house for some romantic time. Before going into her room, I took a dump in the bathroom. Once I was done, I not only noticed that there was no toilet paper left, but I heard her and her 6'5, heavyweight boxer, ex-marine father, talking outside the bathroom door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 549

You deserved it 49 422

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Same thing different taste

By coolhand - 29/08/2009 15:13 - United States

Today, I waited for my girlfriend to get in the shower before I stripped down to try and seduce her. I got ready, threw open the door and went in. I walked in on her taking a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 514

You deserved it 67 441

By Anonymous - 14/09/2012 14:50 - United States

Today, my boyfriend tried to spice things up by sneaking into the shower with me. Instead, he walked in on me pooping. I only had the shower running because I was afraid he would hear me taking a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 284

You deserved it 30 208

By IceMage - 18/01/2010 00:57 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I decided to sneak into the shower at her house while her parents went out to eat and a movie. Half way through our shower we heard a knocking at the door, it was her mom. We had left all of our clothes downstairs. Safe to say I won't be allowed there any more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 644

You deserved it 39 423

Joe Bidet

By tmrwsmggls - 16/11/2020 14:01 - United States

Today, I went to the bathroom at my boyfriend's house. Right as I sat down and started taking a dump, I looked over at the empty toilet paper roll and remembered his roommate had told us the night before that they were out of toilet paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 943

You deserved it 347

By Anonymous - 03/08/2011 17:03 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I snuck into the bathroom together at his house for a quickie. Just as we unzipped our pants, his step-dad knocked on the door. Panicking, I jumped into the closet to hide. When his step-dad came in, he went to put some towels away. In the closet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 101

You deserved it 42 158

By anony - 27/02/2013 13:49 - Australia - Melbourne

Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend by quietly undressing and sneaking into the bathroom to join him in the shower. He was bent over taking a dump, pushing his turd down the plughole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 722

You deserved it 6 693

By GasAttack - 07/09/2009 13:32 - Canada

Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 474

You deserved it 8 533

By Anonymous - 01/08/2019 06:00

Today, my boyfriend sneaked into my room, not knowing I wasn't home. It would have been great, except my dad went in my room to put laundry away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 253

You deserved it 433

By FUCK GOD - 03/02/2013 23:04 - Argentina - Salta

Today, for the first time in weeks, my wife felt frisky, and we started fooling around. Half-way through undressing me, she bolted out, claiming she had the shits. About five minutes later, she tearfully called out from the bathroom, begging me to bring her a fresh roll of toilet paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 124

You deserved it 4 859

By EmbarrassedGirlfriend101 - 17/08/2011 16:40 - United States

Today, while at my boyfriend's house, my stomach began to hurt really badly, so I excused myself to take a shit. I let it all out. Later on, his dad went to the bathroom and yelled, "Goddamn son, what the hell did you do in here?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 295

You deserved it 7 527

CrimsonWolf1294 0

Sunday 23 January 2011 0:09

There is no possible way that you didn't deserve this...

sweet_candy_ 17

Sunday 23 January 2011 0:06

lmao I hope you make it out alive.

Comments

Drummer389000 0

Sunday 23 January 2011 2:50

take a dump BEFORE you sneak into your girlfriends house. ;)

Driveshaft 5

Sunday 23 January 2011 2:58

dear diary...today I learned the phrase "stomp a mudhole in your ass!" ydi Dingus McGee

dlcccall 0

Sunday 23 January 2011 2:58

nice knowing ya ps at least you crapper in the toilet

sallen0046 4

Sunday 23 January 2011 3:19

You illegally entered a boxing ex-marines home to crap in his bathroom and defile his daughter... how could you have possibly though this would end well? Personally, I hope he kicked your ass and decides to press charges for breaking into his home. It doesn't matter how well you know a person, you never enter a home uninvited, especially when the house doesn't even belong to the person you're going to "visit" in the first place.

xNephilim 18

Sunday 23 January 2011 4:29

No court would ever let that get through. It's his freaking girlfriend's house. Kids do that all the time.

justbecuz123 0

Sunday 23 January 2011 8:36

73 - girlfriend or not, it does not matter. My girlfriend's parents love me, but if they saw me in the house when they arrived home, we would both be in deep shit. Actually, I am allowed in my girlfriend's house when her parents aren't home... but my point stands.

summerlove07 0

Sunday 23 January 2011 3:30

YDI...why you would decide to take a dump at her house D: other than that, FYL

Jesterful009 0

Sunday 23 January 2011 3:36

hahaha!!! sucks for you! did the bathroom door at least have a lock on it to save you some time?

loverr31 0

Sunday 23 January 2011 3:36

You all are stupid after reading your comments.

cguinn17 9

Sunday 23 January 2011 3:55

OP's an idiot but i'd tap the dad twice.

CyclonePsycho 1

Sunday 23 January 2011 4:08

Let me get this straight: you sneaked into your girlfriends house (it doesn't matter if you were invited or otherwise by the girlfriend, btw, seeing as it's not her house), didn't bother to check if the dad was or would be home, then used the bathroom? What the hell is wrong with you? Wow. Just... Just YDI.