Love: Today, I thought I would be cute for my 1 year anniversary with...

By cuteloser - 04/10/2014 13:57 - Australia

Today, I thought I would be cute for my 1 year anniversary with my girlfriend so I cooked a three course meal for her with candles and rose petals on the floor. She loved the dinner, except now she's passed out in a food coma upstairs while I'm left with the dishes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 342

You deserved it 7 564

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

The best laid plans…

By Anonymous - 03/02/2023 18:00

Today, I decided to surprise my girlfriend by cooking her dinner. I spent hours preparing and making sure everything was perfect. I lit candles, set the table, and even put on some soft music. When she came home, she'd already eaten and wasn't hungry. FML

I agree, your life sucks 876

You deserved it 150

By Anonymous - 09/11/2011 20:00 - Canada

Today, I took my girlfriend out for dinner to a fancy Italian restaurant for our one year anniversary. After giving her some roses, freshly baked cookies, and a thoughtful poem I wrote for her, she started laughing and asked for her real gift. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 982

You deserved it 7 329

Lost in the sauce

By Pauly D - 21/05/2024 00:00 - Australia - Perth

Today, I cooked a romantic dinner for my partner to celebrate our five year anniversary. I spent hours preparing a snazzy meal. Just as we sat down to eat, I realized I had forgotten to turn off the oven, and our dessert was now a charred lump of coal. We only realised this when the fire alarm in the kitchen went off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 433

You deserved it 186

Romance is dead

By Anonymous - 07/09/2009 06:05 - United States

Today, at my girlfriend's place, I cleaned up her room, put candles everywhere, scented the air, and placed rose petals all over her bed in an attempt to be romantic and loving. The first thing she said when she saw all this was, "Uhhhhgg, I'll have to clean all this up." FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 375

You deserved it 5 495

Bake off

By sadman - 07/05/2011 23:10 - United States

Today, it's my three month anniversary with my girlfriend and so I decided to bake her a cake from scratch. It took me three hours, a call to my mom, three different recipe books, and half my pantry. On the way to her house, I stopped to pick up flowers and left the cake in the car. It melted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 655

You deserved it 11 777

By snarly1 - 03/01/2012 08:14 - United States

Today, it was our one year anniversary. After a surprise re-creation of our first date, we went home, in the mood for love. The food poisoning from the restaurant had a different idea. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 852

You deserved it 2 498

By anonymous - 31/01/2013 04:02 - Canada - Fergus

Today, my boyfriend and I celebrated our anniversary. I had cooked him a romantic meal and we were planning on eating it in front of the fire. This would have gone great had I not forgotten to unblock the chimney. My entire basement filled with smoke and didn't clear for three hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 635

You deserved it 28 883

By Sad Chef ;( - 05/12/2014 03:33 - United States

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. Being a chef of a highly-rated restaurant, I cooked a well-liked dish. Not only did she say no, but commented on how bland and tasteless the meal was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 960

You deserved it 3 360

A+ for Effort

By Anonymous - 14/02/2017 22:40 - United States - Monroe

Today, being Valentine's Day, I went all out for my wife with flowers, a candlelit dinner, and tickets to a broadway show. The flowers arrived dead, the dinner sucked, and my wife hated the show. Afterwards, I tried to be intimate, but apparently I smelled like a shart trapped in a pant leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 042

You deserved it 741

A man without a plan

By Anonymous - 31/01/2023 16:30

Today, I was going to surprise my partner with a romantic dinner, but when I got home I realized I had forgotten the main ingredient: the food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 221

You deserved it 837

kitten1800 18

Saturday 4 October 2014 18:55

You're a good guy OP, I'm sure she'll thank you when she wakes up. Good things come to those who wait ;)

XxXBadAshXxX 27

Saturday 4 October 2014 18:55

You did a good job! Whenever she comes out of it I'm sure there are plenty of things in store for you.

Comments

kotake 7

Saturday 4 October 2014 21:01

and why wasn't that cute? because you didn't get to do the horizontal tango after? that's not being cute, that's being horny :P

Enslaved 36

Saturday 4 October 2014 21:29

Ummm girls are also horny and like sex too. Stop trying to make the guy think he did anything wrong. He could have done nothing and still wanted sex just because it's their anniversary. Btw there's nothing wrong with wanting to have sex if it's mutually accepted.

nolifeatall 6

Sunday 5 October 2014 2:10

because men think that if they do something nice then they deserve sex. so they were saying he was only trying to get sex out of it instead of just being cute about it.

summer135790 15

Saturday 4 October 2014 21:38

Sorry op, at least you tried, it's the thought that counts (:

EmpireCityRay 13

Sunday 5 October 2014 11:18

His girlfriend will remember your post when she dies one day off his awful cooking. @OP Stick to cooking Chef-Boy-ar-Dee lol

sydstoomuch 19

Saturday 4 October 2014 21:59

The Itis!!!

ldkindasucks 6

Saturday 4 October 2014 22:21

How is this an FML? You treated your girlfriend, and she loved it. Is it FYL because she didn't clean after you treated her? Or because she didn't have sex with you?