Miscellaneous: Today, I told my husband I wanted a divorce. He told me he didn't.... - FML

By jentown11 - 28/09/2009 15:14 - United States

Today, I told my husband I wanted a divorce. He told me he didn't. End of discussion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 806

You deserved it 18 036

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Same thing different taste

Fast food dinner

By anonymous - 18/12/2019 20:00 - United States - San Angelo

Today, I called my husband and asked him what he wanted from our favorite fast food place. A divorce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 203

You deserved it 195

By Anonymous - 19/05/2014 18:43 - United States - Shawnee

Today, my husband suggested we get divorced, "for tax purposes". FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 700

You deserved it 5 223

Too late

By Anonymous - 16/07/2023 03:00

Today, my husband told me he'd changed his mind and no longer wants children. We already have two kids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 877

You deserved it 140

By Anonymous - 14/04/2015 07:21 - United Kingdom - Nottingham

Today, my husband of 3 weeks told me he doesn't want to be married anymore because I suggested getting a joint bank account. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 823

You deserved it 4 446

By Nuts - 07/11/2015 02:55 - Canada - Grimsby

Today, my daughter told me she wanted to divorce me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 710

You deserved it 3 166

By PokeWife - 06/02/2013 13:38 - United States - Omaha

Today, my husband started a conversation with, "In Pokémon…" and ended the same conversation with "…and that's why we should divorce." FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 308

You deserved it 4 525

By ZaraAce - 15/04/2011 11:38 - United Kingdom

Today, my husband of 30 years told me that he thought we should 'just be friends'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 202

You deserved it 4 763

The whole kit and caboodle

By Anonymous - 05/07/2023 21:00

Today, I asked my husband for a divorce. He said fine, as long as I got full custody of the kids. I did an actual double take; he didn’t want shared custody, he wanted me to take the kids, no arguments or negotiating, because he doesn’t want the kids anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 437

You deserved it 536

Bad timing

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - Cedar Rapids

Today, I finally worked up the courage to tell my boyfriend that I wanted to go separate ways. Before I could say anything, he proposed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 074

You deserved it 3 755

By Lace - 23/08/2010 04:17 - United States

Today, my husband just told me that he no longer loves me but keeps me around to handle his finances. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 139

You deserved it 3 754

Next

Top comments

mo_the_owl 0

Monday 28 September 2009 19:52

pfffff... Texas.

anonnie 0

Monday 28 September 2009 19:52

Damn. Lol

Comments

Adurr 0

Wednesday 30 September 2009 7:34

that sucks

mikhailb1990 0

Thursday 1 October 2009 8:30

ahahahahahahahahaha.......whipped!

PallasAthea 0

Thursday 1 October 2009 10:41

Lol. Because you need need his permission, of course.

googoodoll123 0

Friday 2 October 2009 0:47

haha i agree with #162 soooo wipped

Projund_Skishy 0

Friday 2 October 2009 2:41

Genesis 3:16

mangotron 0

Friday 2 October 2009 3:53

lol owned, NOW DO THE DISHES!!!

WTFsGoingOn 0

Friday 2 October 2009 3:54

Maybe he believes in the 80 20 rule of relationships.

googoodoll123 0

Friday 2 October 2009 6:56

Damn and who said every thing is better in Texas.

boolover 0

Friday 2 October 2009 21:35

Just leave him if you are not happy with him anymore... I did and believe me you will feel better when he is out of your life.

Josh_Factor 0

Thursday 15 October 2009 21:09

Oh yeah, go ahead and leave. Instead of making this relationship work, just find the perfect guy. I'm sure everything will end up absolutely perfect with the next guy you find. Unless you're getting abused, but it sounds more like you simply got tired of him or there's a problem you refuse to try and work out. Your life is only messed because that's the way you choose to make it.

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Keywords

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The Top

Today, I annoyed my friend by texting him "Meow" over and over at random times of the day because when he's drunk he meows in his sleep. Apparently a great way to get back at me was to tell my parents I wasn't a virgin, and that I got high on Wednesday. He had pictures to prove it for both. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 634

You deserved it 68 713

Today, and ever since I told my wife I had sacked my secretary, a pretty redhead, I’ve noticed my wife has started reverting to her old habit of getting headaches on Fridays, which is normally sex night. Funny how this wasn’t a problem when I had a pretty secretary. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 994

You deserved it 1 050

The Top

Today, my ex asked me if I would reconsider a future with him. I said, “Only if we can learn to communicate effectively." He said, “Good talk, this time you actually got through to me.” Then he ceased all communication. FML

I agree, your life sucks 882

You deserved it 141

Today, I was shopping for socks and I went to look in the men's section. Dad said: "You don't want those, they are for men." I asked what the difference was? He looked around, and then leaned in and whispered: "Men have a penis!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 969

You deserved it 491

Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex when halfway through, he leaned over to grab his cup of hot coffee off the nightstand. He then attempted to drink it and spilled most of it on me. He never stopped thrusting the whole time, and wanted to continue after. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 610

You deserved it 3 310

Today, since I'm too broke to get a new one, I had to duct tape my bra. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 891

You deserved it 3 598

Today, I was waiting at an intersection. Across from me, a car was approaching when a bunny ran out. Trying to save it, I flashed my lights and beeped at the car crazily, and the bunny turned around. The lights turned, and as I drove forward the bunny came back out and I hit it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 699

You deserved it 7 597

Today, it’s the middle of my vacation and I just got a notification saying my time off request was denied. A month earlier, I got the notice saying it was approved. I’m literally 4 states over. I’m not going to have a job when I get back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 188

You deserved it 92