Miscellaneous: Today, I told my husband I wanted a divorce. He told me he didn't....

By jentown11 - 28/09/2009 15:14 - United States

Today, I told my husband I wanted a divorce. He told me he didn't. End of discussion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 806

You deserved it 18 036

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Same thing different taste

Fast food dinner

By anonymous - 18/12/2019 20:00 - United States - San Angelo

Today, I called my husband and asked him what he wanted from our favorite fast food place. A divorce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 203

You deserved it 195

By Anonymous - 19/05/2014 18:43 - United States - Shawnee

Today, my husband suggested we get divorced, "for tax purposes". FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 700

You deserved it 5 223

Too late

By Anonymous - 16/07/2023 03:00

Today, my husband told me he'd changed his mind and no longer wants children. We already have two kids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 877

You deserved it 140

By Anonymous - 14/04/2015 07:21 - United Kingdom - Nottingham

Today, my husband of 3 weeks told me he doesn't want to be married anymore because I suggested getting a joint bank account. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 823

You deserved it 4 446

By Nuts - 07/11/2015 02:55 - Canada - Grimsby

Today, my daughter told me she wanted to divorce me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 710

You deserved it 3 166

By PokeWife - 06/02/2013 13:38 - United States - Omaha

Today, my husband started a conversation with, "In Pokémon…" and ended the same conversation with "…and that's why we should divorce." FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 308

You deserved it 4 525

By ZaraAce - 15/04/2011 11:38 - United Kingdom

Today, my husband of 30 years told me that he thought we should 'just be friends'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 202

You deserved it 4 763

The whole kit and caboodle

By Anonymous - 05/07/2023 21:00

Today, I asked my husband for a divorce. He said fine, as long as I got full custody of the kids. I did an actual double take; he didn’t want shared custody, he wanted me to take the kids, no arguments or negotiating, because he doesn’t want the kids anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 437

You deserved it 536

Bad timing

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - Cedar Rapids

Today, I finally worked up the courage to tell my boyfriend that I wanted to go separate ways. Before I could say anything, he proposed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 074

You deserved it 3 755

By Lace - 23/08/2010 04:17 - United States

Today, my husband just told me that he no longer loves me but keeps me around to handle his finances. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 139

You deserved it 3 754

mo_the_owl 0

Monday 28 September 2009 19:52

pfffff... Texas.

anonnie 0

Monday 28 September 2009 19:52

Damn. Lol

Comments

giganticbrain 0

Tuesday 29 September 2009 2:09

HA! I can see he's the badass in this relationship.

eric01 0

Tuesday 29 September 2009 2:14

YDI, your husband kicks ass. He is a keeper.

isabella_leigh 0

Tuesday 29 September 2009 2:24

i know what you mean.. my parents are going through the same thing.. and it isnt as easy as everyone thinks..

ILoveJace01 0

Tuesday 29 September 2009 2:27

Great communication skills.

hollywoodhero 0

Tuesday 29 September 2009 2:38

sounds like my husband.

VeeZazz 0

Tuesday 29 September 2009 2:46

If you call this an FML, then YDI. Just leave; he can't keep you there.

clovermeg1 0

Tuesday 29 September 2009 3:02

sounds like Orson on desperate housewives YDI

i_stay_anonymous 0

Tuesday 29 September 2009 3:15

Umm... This seriously - edit, SERIOUSLY made it through the moderation? Oh god... Worse FML ever.

mmfgk 0

Tuesday 29 September 2009 3:18

YDI for living in Texas.

youEQUALtosser 0

Tuesday 29 September 2009 3:50

And you can't stand up for yourself? Well, YDI.

Keywords

Embarrassing Love Poopoo peepee Miscellaneous Christmas Romantic Break-ups Money Annoying Gross Ironic Argument Friends Awkward Cute Haircut Holidays Lonely Relatable Capitalism Work Bosses You're fired Cars Covid Health Jealousy Cheating Parenting Kids

The Top

Today, my boyfriend and I decided to try the ice cubes in the vagina thing we'd read about. He kept sticking one in after another and they got stuck. My vagina had a brain freeze for a half an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 786

You deserved it 3 961

Today, my mother and wife are arguing over raising our baby Catholic or Church of England. They’re mad at each other and as a bonus they’re both mad at me because I’m non-religious and genuinely don’t care which made-up religion they try to raise her in, I’m just enjoying being a dad over here. FML

I agree, your life sucks 443

You deserved it 155

The Top

Today, at my daughter's fundraiser, I noticed that a guy with a face only a fist could love kept staring at her. I said "Beautiful, isn't she?" Before I could tell him to keep it in his damned pants, he replied "Hah. She's my girlfriend, dude. Total beast in the sack." Complete news to me on both counts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 766

You deserved it 3 370

Today, because my boyfriend drives a 2-seated sports car, I had to awkwardly sit on his brother's lap as we drove to the store. I soon felt a poking sensation through his pants, just a few minutes before we hit a bumpy road. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 252

You deserved it 7 004

Today, my husband and I were having sex. It was stormy outside, and when lightning flashed through the window, he screamed like a little girl and scrambled off the bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 947

You deserved it 297

Today, my colleague pointed out with a disgusted look on his face that I'm wearing 90s clothes again. Just like every time he sees me. What does he mean by 90s clothes? Jeans. Literally any pair of jeans. FML

I agree, your life sucks 967

You deserved it 67

Today, while waiting the required 5 minutes for my hair removal cream to work, my cat rubbed all over my legs while I wasn't looking. After getting clawed to death throwing her in the bath to get the cream off, all her hair on that side fell off. I now have a half hairless cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 073

You deserved it 4 627

Today, I met one of my favorite webcomic artists. As I purchased a shirt from their booth, he asked, "What size?" I stupidly asked "How big is a small?" He chuckled, "It's small" and chuckled some more. So much for keeping it cool. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 499

You deserved it 7 808