Customers and Work: Today, I took my first fare as a qualified taxi driver. The pride...

By Anonymous - 03/08/2012 14:52 - United States

Today, I took my first fare as a qualified taxi driver. The pride soon diminished as I was forced to listen to my passenger give a greatly detailed description of his recent colonoscopy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 648

You deserved it 2 458

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Same thing different taste

Getting the point across

By Anonymous - 05/05/2020 02:00

Today, I was discharged from hospital and I took a cab home. The driver drove really fast and made sharp turns that made me feel nauseous. As I opened my mouth to tell him to slow down, I threw up all over the back seat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 679

You deserved it 134

Naptime

By Celeste - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - Singapore

Today, I fell asleep in a taxi. So did the taxi driver. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 995

You deserved it 3 325

Hard knock life

By rockytrolley - 08/10/2014 09:01 - Cyprus

Today, my taxi driver kept falling asleep and swerving off the road, so I asked him if he was okay. He stopped and burst out sobbing about the long hours he had to do after his divorce, and his wife taking all he had. Long story short, I ended up driving him home and getting another taxi from his place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 495

You deserved it 3 693

By Anonymous - 15/06/2014 00:34 - Canada - Nanaimo

Today, I started my job as a driving instructor. My first client showed up piss drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 215

You deserved it 4 241

Accept this gift

By for shite's sake - 17/01/2015 22:24 - United Kingdom - Mirfield

Today, I took my driving test. I was really nervous, but I thought I did pretty well in the end. That is until I parked the car and looked to the examiner. He was visibly shaken. He said I'd passed, quickly filled in the paperwork and left. On the downside, my car still smells of his shart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 677

You deserved it 3 731

By Username - 27/01/2011 17:40 - Romania

Today, I was running late for school because I had a huge stomach ache. To save on time, I took a taxi. When the taxi driver hit a bump, I lost control of my bowels and shit myself. Not only do I have to wash my underwear in the sink at school now, but I had to pay the driver extra to remove the smell from his car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 122

You deserved it 5 708

By unhappy - 07/06/2015 18:23 - United States - San Anselmo

Today, I had my first driving lesson. I learned how to be stopped by a cop, who told me what a horrible driver I was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 010

You deserved it 3 961

By Anonymous - 16/07/2011 02:06 - United States

Today, I caught a cab to take me to a hospital appointment. The driver turned around and told me I was in the Cash Cab. I got really excited and screamed. That is, until she laughed and said, "Just kidding. I always wanted to do that to someone." FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 600

You deserved it 9 131

By stevenr579 - 23/01/2013 23:33 - Canada - North Vancouver

Today, I took a taxi ride with my friends. As we were getting out, I paid the taxi driver. With a grin, he drove away fast. It turns out my friend had already paid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 936

You deserved it 7 586

By proteinboy - 16/11/2009 03:00 - United States

Today, I waited for 20 minutes to get a cab outside grand central station in New York (it was raining). Finally, to my relief, I found a cab but when I got in I let a little fart slip. Two minutes later the cabby kicked me out of his cab because I stunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 721

You deserved it 30 475

misspulkadot24 17

Friday 3 August 2012 18:50

I think it would be cool to taxi around people from all over and hear their stories.

Prolux_fml 23

Friday 3 August 2012 18:50

Well, how'd it go?

Comments

j_cat187 19

Friday 3 August 2012 18:56

Just wait until the night shift. You get to meet all sorts of ****** up... I mean interesting people.

bossroyd 4

Friday 3 August 2012 20:11

Like a hooker...I mean a talented woman in the service industry. Or a drug dealer...I mean medicine supplier. Sorry OP, you'll prolly meet worse people than the guy who enjoys talking about his recent colonoscopies. But at the same time, you'll still meet some nice people who are pretty normal and easy to talk to.

siberianhamster 17

Friday 3 August 2012 18:56

The problem with public transport is the public that uses it.

Bigmoneyshotz 0

Friday 3 August 2012 18:58

As long as he didn't smell like a colonoscopy you should be alright!

wowthatissad 9

Friday 3 August 2012 19:00

Nothing like a detailed description of a man's asshole to brighten your day..

nevershoutkendal_fml 10

Friday 3 August 2012 19:01

I'm hoping he didn't show you any pictures.

slimshadey 5

Friday 3 August 2012 19:02

Were the flashbacks in black an white?

CessnaPilot 5

Friday 3 August 2012 19:03

You should pretend that you don't understand English.

SqueakyChipmunk 21

Friday 3 August 2012 20:48

Que? No habla ingles.

Grimmerie 31

Friday 3 August 2012 21:07

*hablo

SqueakyChipmunk 21

Friday 3 August 2012 21:12

I'm female. Habla is feminine. Hablo is masculine. Grammar Nazi fail.

Shrike 23

Friday 3 August 2012 21:16

Hablo means "I speak". "Habla" means "he", "she" or "it speaks". You just said something like "he doesn't speak English" or "he isn't speaking English".

SqueakyChipmunk 21

Friday 3 August 2012 21:46

Great. Thanks to my Spanish teacher, we have at least 100 kids that think habla is the same as hablo. I should have transferred when I had the chance.

chtyree7 1

Friday 3 August 2012 22:34

Shrike is right! It is hablo. I have taken 3 years of Spanish and I am majoring in it in college. You may not have paid attention to the conjugations. Most people don't.