By SaMike - 01/09/2009 01:12 - United States

Today, I took my girlfriend to the movies. She's pretty conservative and I decided after four dates to give her her first ever kiss. As I leaned in she violently sneezed and hit me in the nose with the hand she brought up to cover her face. I broke my nose and got blood down her cleavage. FML
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Same thing different taste

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Top comments

DameGreyWulf 0

.... Conservative.... but she has cleavage. For some reason, this annoys me. FYL though. Better luck next time? At least you have a funny story?

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Comments

Nicoleismyname 0

And btw yes I have little muscle mass, not strong at all, have a poor diet and I'm a 5 ft 110 lb female so I would pretty much say a palm strike and a swift kick to the happy sack (lol) is really the only thing I have going for me if I was ever attacked by a mugger or rapist.

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airplanefood 0

Cleavage doesn't just mean big breasts. It also refers to wearing clothes that are revealing enough to expose the cleft, i.e. her top must have been low enough for blood to spill down. It's just kind of gross thinking about how it must feel to have someone's blood running down between your breasts. F both your lives.

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MacFeat2010 0

It is possible to break a nose by bringing your hand up to cover a sneeze. I bring my hand up rather quickly when i sneeze. Your nose is cartilage not BONE...it is not as hard as bone. With enough velocity it would be possible. Also, nicole was just stating that it is possible to break a nose with just your hand.

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AdvocataDiaboli 0

Dude, if you're going to "decide" to "give" someone their first kiss -- and you can't friggin just ask first -- at least make sure they're into it and not about to sneeze. Idiot.

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RabbitOfAurora 28

Thank you for being the one to say this. OP, you honestly should have asked. What if she didn't want to kiss you yet? Or at all. Your attitude towards this raises red flags for me and YDI.

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_electricbonbon 0

Pimpin88, is it ever possible for you to just write one sentence? Damn.

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frawd_fml 0

seriously date a girl that isn't a prude. i'm not saying date a ****, but date a girl that actually wants to enjoy life and its sensory experiences

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DameGreyWulf 0

It sounds to me like she might be a virgin, if that is her first kiss. It's not that she's against enjoying it, it's that she isn't ready. There is nothing wrong with not being ready, and he was trying to make her feel more comfortable by trying to be spontaneously romantic, and he had some really, really awful timing. Think he COULD have kissed her, then she sneezed all over his face. Or, she could have sneezed while kissing him. OR, she could have sneezed on his face when he moved in, instead of breaking his nose, but that's hardly worse. Just saying he had bad timing any way he went, and it really doesn't seem like it had a lot to do with her being conservative. He pointed that out so he can "set the scene and mood" for the audience; implying he was trying to be a spontaneous romantic or whatever by pointing out it would be her first kiss.

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Nicoleismyname 0

Nah I don't think I'll be carrying a gun around anytime soon. It's not easy for just anyone to be allowed to carry a gun anywhere they go.

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