Love: Today, I took the day off work to be with my wife, since she's...

By boblaj - 22/05/2012 16:11 - United Kingdom - Hastings

Today, I took the day off work to be with my wife, since she's always bemoaning my lack of romantic gestures. As thanks, she spent most of the day reading Fifty Shades of Grey, which is basically a blatant plagiarism of Twilight, starring a pair of two-dimensional BDSM freaks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 872

You deserved it 4 032

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Same thing different taste

By fiftyno - 01/10/2012 15:02 - United States - Tacoma

Today, I came home to my wife practising biting her lip in the mirror. Fuck you, Fifty Shades of Grey. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 853

You deserved it 4 123

By Divorce? - 29/07/2017 00:30

Today, I came home and caught my husband in a compromising position. He was watching Twilight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 025

You deserved it 604

By Anonymous - 20/08/2013 08:06 - United States - Gig Harbor

Today, I had to endure my girlfriend crying and screaming at me. The reason? I'm not able to please her like the fictional character Christian Grey in 50 Shades of Grey. When she left me, she took all her stuff and left me with copies of the 3 books. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 434

You deserved it 4 426

By I_dislike_Twilight - 08/09/2011 12:52 - United States

Today, my wife showed me what was missing in our marriage with a Twilight video montage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 399

You deserved it 4 707

They're still books, technically

By breakmyfall - 15/11/2020 02:02

Today, my brother's girlfriend came over to visit and we got to talking about books. Thinking she'd be interested, I suggested a few. She responded that she "only reads good literature." The only books I've ever seen her read are Fifty Shades of Gray and the Twilight saga. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 071

You deserved it 125

Affection breakdown

By Anonymous - 19/12/2020 13:02 - United Kingdom - Boston

Today, my wife can't be bothered to do anything that isn't work, talk about her work, and sit on the sofa. Then she complains that I don't show any affection, when she can be bothered to even talk to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 885

You deserved it 143

Stuck in the past

By Anonymous - 05/04/2020 05:00

Today, I found out my boyfriend still writes Twilight fan fiction. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 409

You deserved it 409

No rest

By Anonymous - 30/10/2021 11:00

Today, I'd booked a day off work so I could sit and read books all day. I told my wife this, and her response was basically, "Well since you're at home not doing anything important, here’s a list of jobs that need doing." I wasn’t aware enjoying reading counted as doing nothing important. FML

I agree, your life sucks 717

You deserved it 355

By actor my ass - 21/01/2012 22:44 - Canada

Today, trying to be romantic, I invited my girlfriend over to watch a movie. I said she could pick one up on the way, and I'd pay for it later. I ended up having to suffer through some "movie" that involved nothing but Nicolas Cage gurning like a stroke victim between crappy fight scenes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 294

You deserved it 29 126

By whymanwhy - 13/04/2015 10:43 - Czech Republic

Today, I went on a date with a cute guy I met at a bookstore. He stood up and said he was leaving when I said that I didn't like 50 Shades of Grey, because he, "doesn't want to be near a bitch who doesn't know her place". He then told me to give him a ride home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 201

You deserved it 3 347

ManInTheMachine 19

Tuesday 22 May 2012 22:35

Dammit redbluegreen! You edited your comment and now I look like an idiot.

Snafuusmc 12

Tuesday 22 May 2012 21:52

IT'S A TRAP!

Comments

jwbfml 11

Tuesday 22 May 2012 22:59

Read it together and be BDSM freaks afterwards.

truthbringer007 6

Tuesday 22 May 2012 23:04

Its clear you haven't read 50 shades of grey

smilz2u 0

Tuesday 22 May 2012 23:08

I don't see how this book can be connected to Twilight. First off, Twilight is a love triangle story. This book has no love triangle. Secondly, Twilight is about a vamp and werewolf. This book has no paranormal in it at all. Thirdly, Twilight has no explicit sex scenes in it. This book is so full of sex that parts of it seem monotonous. If anything, maybe after she reads all three books in this trilogy, she might want you to take her to an adult toy store. Then you might be happy she chose to read them hehe :)