Animals: Today, I tried to have a relaxing soak in the tub. The giant...

By nopenopenopenope - 23/09/2016 03:28 - United States - Winston Salem

Today, I tried to have a relaxing soak in the tub. The giant wolf spider that was already in the tub didn't like me trying to set it free outside. It ran right across my feet and back into my house when I dumped it out of a cup outside. I screamed like a little girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 679

You deserved it 2 475

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By terrified - 09/08/2015 03:10 - United States - Forest City

Today, I saw a huge wolf spider in my room. It ran off and hid before I could kill it, but after two hours looking for it then giving up, I finally found it, with my foot, as I put on my shoes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 411

You deserved it 2 447

By imfromtexas02 - 06/06/2009 14:03 - United States

Today, I discovered an enormous hairy spider sitting in the bathtub. I also discovered that I scream like a girl and pee a little bit when I am truly terrified. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 436

You deserved it 12 633

By Anonymous - 29/03/2009 05:04 - United States

Today, I saw a spider in my bathtub, so instead of killing it, i decided to bring my dog inside the bathroom to kill the spider for me. Turns out that the spider was a black widow, and my dog was bit. The dog killed the spider. The spider killed my dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 90 169

You deserved it 185 637

Buggin' out

By Anonymous - 21/09/2022 22:00 - Australia

Today, I reached into my wardrobe to get ready for the day, when something hairy tickled my hand. Imagine my shock seeing a fully-grown wolf spider staring me down from a coat hanger. I grabbed the can of bug spray and let him have it. Half the can later, I now need to re-wash my entire closet. Damn arachnophobia. FML

I agree, your life sucks 837

You deserved it 421

By yuckspider - 20/04/2009 00:17 - United States

Today, I saw a spider crawling on the floor but had nothing to kill it with and it hid somewhere. So, I got dressed and went out and come home for a shower, and as I'm taking off my undies, something crushed and black fell out. It was the spider and he had been in my underwear the entire day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 324

You deserved it 7 652

By Anonymous - 14/03/2010 20:30 - United States

Today, while taking a shower, a spider fell from the ceiling onto my foot. I took down my shower head to wash it down the drain, and in the process, got soap in my eye and rammed my head into the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 662

You deserved it 8 343

Adapt, improvise, overcome

By Arthur B. - 24/09/2019 12:01

Today, I saw a spider in my kitchen. Freaked, but trying to be humane, I held out a piece of paper so it would climb on, and I would then put it outside. However, it jumped out of nowhere and landed on my face. My reaction was to whack at where the spider was - my face. I stumbled around, disoriented; the spider got away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 352

You deserved it 464

By Hannah - 04/03/2012 20:46 - United States

Today, I faced down the Godzilla of all spiders. I smashed the goddamned holy shit out of it. Trying to impress my cute new roommate, I scooped up the remains and showed him. It was his pet tarantula. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 994

You deserved it 31 758

He was just chillin'

By Anonymous - 04/07/2021 13:59

Today, I was taking a shower when I noticed the huge spider above my head. Now, being the smart person I am, I sprayed the water up at it, causing it to fall. Right on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 352

You deserved it 1 011

Freaked

By AussieGirl - 21/11/2009 11:40 - Australia

Today, as I put on my pajamas, a large spider ran down my leg. After freaking out, killing it, and recomposing myself, I went to the bathroom. As I sat down to go to the toilet, I looked up to see hundreds of baby spiders hanging over my head. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 178

You deserved it 4 027

Bobby319 24

Friday 23 September 2016 14:56

Time to burn your house down

Shay_Shay97 23

Friday 23 September 2016 15:09

I would've just straight up cried if I saw that thing. But if it ran across my leg? Oh hell no, it's time to amputate.

Comments

Notesz_b 13

Saturday 24 September 2016 9:37

I swear, just by reading OP's name first, I knew this was going to be spider related.

species4872 19

Saturday 24 September 2016 23:32

Consider yourself lucky you aren't in Australia, over here a spider in the bath is just a scout for the rest of them and you would've had a few snakes waiting for you outside the door also. If your in northern Oz the odd crocodile as well.

healthcarechick 9

Sunday 25 September 2016 1:14

Oh hell no!!!!! Douse your house with lighter fluid and light a match!!!! "We don't need no water let that muther ****** burn!!!!!!"

Taurus_ChicKa 36

Sunday 25 September 2016 21:44

Should have just squished it. If those things bite you, it hurts horribly and leaves a huge welt.

LoZelda123 20

Monday 26 September 2016 1:15

1. OP you have some serious balls to be able to catch that thing to let it out, so no shame for screaming 2. spiders are actually more likely to die if you remove them from wherever you found them in your home because they have already formed their own ecosystem, which is probably why it ran back into your house so burning the house may be the best option ^^;

snickerpuss 9

Tuesday 27 September 2016 1:50

Aw well done for not trying to kill the thing, it always makes me sad when people kill spiders, ever since I've read James and The Giant Peach! Hope it will stay hidden in the house now so you don't have to do that again