Miscellaneous: Today, I tried to imitate Mary Poppins by jumping off a shed...

By Anonymous - 30/05/2009 03:04 - United States

Today, I tried to imitate Mary Poppins by jumping off a shed with an umbrella. I spent the next 3 hours in the emergency room. My leg is broken. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 241

You deserved it 246 178

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Same thing different taste

By chinchilla4404 - 02/08/2011 14:17 - United States

Today, I broke my leg while trying to show my friend how I broke my other leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 136

You deserved it 72 223

By Malpal - 23/01/2009 11:03 - United States

Today, I tried jumping off my bed over the footboard. I tripped and broke a full length mirror with my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 544

You deserved it 29 632

By Anonymous - 02/03/2018 19:30 - United States

Today, I woke up after being sick from the flu and tried to get out of bed. I forgot I was in a bunk bed and broke my ankle in the fall down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 338

You deserved it 856

It's all deregulation's fault

By Anonymous - 23/03/2023 22:00

Today, it's been a few days since I moved into a new apartment and was excited to finally have a balcony. I went out to enjoy the view, but as I leaned against the railing, it gave way and I fell two stories onto the pavement below. I ended up with a broken leg and a huge medical bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 075

You deserved it 111

Unbelievable

By Anonymous - 15/08/2013 17:39 - Spain - Mon?var

Today, I slipped and fell down the stairs, landing hard on my knee. Through my screams of agony, my mom accused me of exaggerating the pain, and said I was just being an attention seeker, before finally taking me to hospital. I was told my leg was broken. She refused to apologize. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 988

You deserved it 3 458

By Anonymous - 11/11/2015 11:03 - United States - Rochester

Today, I fractured my shinbone after slipping on a leaf. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 802

You deserved it 2 279

Agony

By ... - 02/10/2012 20:55 - Canada - Airdrie

Today, I fell down the stairs and landed heavily on my foot. Because I wasn't crying, my mom refused to take me to the hospital. It took me an hour of agony to convince her. It turned out to be broken in three different places. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 365

You deserved it 1 789

Stealthy

By jessye1182 - 11/05/2012 23:16 - United States - Yaphank

Today, I was babysitting, playing hide and seek. I tried to jump behind the armchair, but it tipped, and I hit my head into the wind chimes, ripped the curtain rod from the wall, and smashed my knee into the wall. I lay on the ground in agonizing pain as the little girl shouted, "I know where you are!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 708

You deserved it 6 265

By IronFoot - 14/08/2011 02:41 - Canada

Today, while on the roof of my friend's house, I took a shortcut down by jumping onto the roof of his nearby shed. Not only did I go right through it and hurt my arm, I've also received several calls from my friend's dad, demanding I pay for the damage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 886

You deserved it 54 567

By seussical65 - 14/04/2009 13:48 - United States

Today, during dress rehearsal before the show, I came in with crutches pretending I broke my leg as a joke. I then threw away the crutches, laughed and then fell down some stairs. I am now in crutches with a broken leg. I was the lead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 739

You deserved it 93 545

Authoress 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 12:07

I'm sorry to hear your leg is broken, but honestly? Are you a complete idiot? For the sake of humanity, I hope you are a troll.

Addicted2FML303 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 12:09

Gravity's a bitch, huh?

Comments

DrConstantine 0

Sunday 31 May 2009 17:58

Just a little chlorine in the gene pool, didn't do it's job though . . .

milkbox 0

Sunday 31 May 2009 18:00

hahaha are you five?? YDI.

J3553ROCKS 0

Sunday 31 May 2009 18:33

Hahaha! You got what you deserved! Nobody can imitate Mary Poppins!

addidas0_o 0

Sunday 31 May 2009 19:15

i had to wait 4 hours in the ER=Emergency room with my fractured wrist after i effed up skateboarding

FMLfangirl89 0

Sunday 31 May 2009 19:47

Never reproduce.

greenfinch 0

Sunday 31 May 2009 19:50

That was pretty ******* stupid. Mary Poppins>Chuck Norris. Why even try?

porkchop69 0

Sunday 31 May 2009 19:57

haha #12. and what does ydi mean ppl? im lost haha

jenncraig_123 0

Sunday 31 May 2009 20:31

YDI = you deserved it. AND YDI.

Sarahhh4978 0

Sunday 31 May 2009 21:04

How boring is your life?

Fluffiness 0

Sunday 31 May 2009 21:06

FYL... Since you actually attempted. O_O;

Keywords

Embarrassing Love Poopoo peepee Miscellaneous Christmas Romantic Break-ups Annoying Money Gross Ironic Argument Awkward Friends Cute Haircut Lonely Holidays Relatable Bosses Capitalism Work Cars You're fired Health Covid Jealousy Cheating Kids Parenting

The Top

Today, I woke up feeling awful, having caught the same illness my boyfriend had last night. When he was sick, I skipped my friend's baby shower to take care of him. Now that I'm sick, he goes to a friend's place, says to call if I need him, then turns his phone off. Seriously. FML

I agree, your life sucks 60 100

You deserved it 7 572

Today, my wife dragged me to the bathroom, promising to "show something hot." Not that I was in the mood, but okay. She took off her pants, sat on a toilet, and demanded that I tell her about my day. She wanted me to entertain her while she was taking a dump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 511

You deserved it 84

The Top

Today, my wife appropriated our savings to finance her crazy, midlife crisis idea of designing and marketing Cheez Whiz dildos. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 685

You deserved it 3 466

Today, as a reward for finishing all my work in maths, I was told I could leave early. Apparently, later on, the class had a random attendance inspection. I didn't know about this until I received a detention for not being present at that class. My teacher had completely forgotten about me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 933

You deserved it 2 732

Today, my youth pastor died and I was crying. My boss told me to dry my tears, because it was affecting my coworkers. Sorry I'm human and cry when someone I know dies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 894

You deserved it 171

Today, I had to give a speech as part of my campaign for school captain. I was rather happy with it and so I told another candidate my speech. Apparently it was a good idea as minutes later that same candidate stole my entire speech, leaving me looking like a complete idiot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 943

You deserved it 37 813

Today, I discovered why the toilet seat is often sticky in the morning. My husband is too lazy to lift the seat, instead opting to pee all over it and sleepily wipe it down with loo paper if he notices a splash. He doesn't see why it's a problem since he 'cleans' it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 526

You deserved it 782

Today, my last grown child moved out and into their own place. As I stood in my house, which was finally empty and quiet for the first time in 37 years, all I could think was, "THANK GOD THOSE IRRITATING SODS ARE GONE, I HAVE MY LIFE BACK, BUT DAMN IT, I’M TOO OLD TO HAVE REAL FUN ANYMORE." FML

I agree, your life sucks 459

You deserved it 811