Miscellaneous: Today, I tried to imitate Mary Poppins by jumping off a shed... - FML

By Anonymous - 30/05/2009 03:04 - United States

Today, I tried to imitate Mary Poppins by jumping off a shed with an umbrella. I spent the next 3 hours in the emergency room. My leg is broken. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 241

You deserved it 246 178

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Same thing different taste

By chinchilla4404 - 02/08/2011 14:17 - United States

Today, I broke my leg while trying to show my friend how I broke my other leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 136

You deserved it 72 223

By Malpal - 23/01/2009 11:03 - United States

Today, I tried jumping off my bed over the footboard. I tripped and broke a full length mirror with my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 544

You deserved it 29 632

By Anonymous - 02/03/2018 19:30 - United States

Today, I woke up after being sick from the flu and tried to get out of bed. I forgot I was in a bunk bed and broke my ankle in the fall down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 338

You deserved it 856

It's all deregulation's fault

By Anonymous - 23/03/2023 22:00

Today, it's been a few days since I moved into a new apartment and was excited to finally have a balcony. I went out to enjoy the view, but as I leaned against the railing, it gave way and I fell two stories onto the pavement below. I ended up with a broken leg and a huge medical bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 075

You deserved it 111

Unbelievable

By Anonymous - 15/08/2013 17:39 - Spain - Mon?var

Today, I slipped and fell down the stairs, landing hard on my knee. Through my screams of agony, my mom accused me of exaggerating the pain, and said I was just being an attention seeker, before finally taking me to hospital. I was told my leg was broken. She refused to apologize. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 988

You deserved it 3 458

By Anonymous - 11/11/2015 11:03 - United States - Rochester

Today, I fractured my shinbone after slipping on a leaf. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 802

You deserved it 2 279

Agony

By ... - 02/10/2012 20:55 - Canada - Airdrie

Today, I fell down the stairs and landed heavily on my foot. Because I wasn't crying, my mom refused to take me to the hospital. It took me an hour of agony to convince her. It turned out to be broken in three different places. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 365

You deserved it 1 789

Stealthy

By jessye1182 - 11/05/2012 23:16 - United States - Yaphank

Today, I was babysitting, playing hide and seek. I tried to jump behind the armchair, but it tipped, and I hit my head into the wind chimes, ripped the curtain rod from the wall, and smashed my knee into the wall. I lay on the ground in agonizing pain as the little girl shouted, "I know where you are!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 708

You deserved it 6 265

By IronFoot - 14/08/2011 02:41 - Canada

Today, while on the roof of my friend's house, I took a shortcut down by jumping onto the roof of his nearby shed. Not only did I go right through it and hurt my arm, I've also received several calls from my friend's dad, demanding I pay for the damage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 886

You deserved it 54 567

By seussical65 - 14/04/2009 13:48 - United States

Today, during dress rehearsal before the show, I came in with crutches pretending I broke my leg as a joke. I then threw away the crutches, laughed and then fell down some stairs. I am now in crutches with a broken leg. I was the lead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 739

You deserved it 93 545

Next

Top comments

Authoress 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 12:07

I'm sorry to hear your leg is broken, but honestly? Are you a complete idiot? For the sake of humanity, I hope you are a troll.

Addicted2FML303 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 12:09

Gravity's a bitch, huh?

Comments

TuxRug 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 8:36

You're the reason they have stupid warnings on everything. If umbrella==parachute, you'd see skydivers using them. Plus at shed-height a parachute wouldn't have time to deploy. You were a bed of nails away from a Darwin Award.

herbertx 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 11:29

servers you right to do something that dumb

crazycracker37 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 15:31

your life must be ******, seeing as you are brain dead. FAIL.

FEARTHEGOAT93 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 19:26

For **** sake....UR ****** STUPID Lets see.. Gravity vs. Dumbass..... GRAVITY WINS

anton4223 3

Tuesday 2 June 2009 20:05

lol Gravity is a bitch but ur the idiot,,,,,,the next movie you should try is hmm Titanic ?? help ill be the iceberg u be the ship

anton4223 3

Tuesday 2 June 2009 20:07

# 1 she diddnt jump she floated,,,

dmmd8686 0

Tuesday 2 June 2009 20:19

You're a complete idiot. How old are you - 5? I hope for the sake of humanity you never reproduce.

italian99 0

Wednesday 3 June 2009 0:28

Jesus Christ are you dumb. You cant fly with an umbrella. Everyone knows its a parasol that does the trick.

plehning 0

Wednesday 3 June 2009 1:23

Who tries stuff like that? Ur an idiot

whobutme23 0

Wednesday 3 June 2009 2:47

Are you 5 years old? Who does stuff like that?

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The Top

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. He knows that I love when he breathes on my neck. Just when I was about to finish, he put his lips a millimeter away from my neck and ear, and breathed, "I love how you smell like my grandmother's house." FML

I agree, your life sucks 111 810

You deserved it 9 769

Today, after finally getting up the confidence, I started talking really dirty to my boyfriend on the phone. I was getting really onto it, and he seemed to enjoy it too. Then I stopped for a second to gauge his reaction. He was snoring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 873

You deserved it 4 683

The Top

Today, I tried to help my community by cleaning up a patch of waste ground covered in litter. Instead of gratitude, I was reported to the cops and issued with fines for noise complaints, trespassing, causing a nuisance, littering, harming wildlife, and about 15 other offences. Screw this community. FML

I agree, your life sucks 937

You deserved it 170

Today, I was camping with my family, and had to share a tent with my 13 year old brother. During the night he had to pee, but instead of going outside to use the bathroom, he zipped open a section of the tent, stuck his knob through it, and peed all over my shoes that were drying outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 364

You deserved it 3 068

Today, I called my aunt to wish her a happy birthday. My mom and I proceeded to sing "Happy Birthday" to her. The first words that came out of her mouth were, "You guys are terrible singers." You're welcome, I guess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 366

You deserved it 171

Today, I went to a party. Although I wasn't drinking, I was still afraid the cops would bust me. Halfway through the party, the cops showed up. I tried to hop a fence, ripping my pants and cutting my leg in the meantime. It wasn't until was on the ground that I found out there was a gate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 468

You deserved it 2 107

Today, my new online college class about Asian and Pacific American studies is teaching us how to write mini essays, not how to include Asian and Pacific Americans. FML

I agree, your life sucks 296

You deserved it 471

Today, I realized it is my life goal to get kicked out of a fast-food restaurant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 244

You deserved it 870