Intimacy: Today, I wanted to spice things up in the bedroom with my husband,...

By BurnedDown - 28/10/2014 20:45 - United Kingdom - Bridlington

Today, I wanted to spice things up in the bedroom with my husband, so I set up some Halloween torches to create a wild ambiance. Unfortunately our dickhead neighbours saw the glow, didn't remember that fire tends to give off smoke, and called the fire department on us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 500

You deserved it 7 806

When Christmas Ends Badly…
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It's getting hot in here…

By pmek - 26/03/2012 09:11 - Australia - Collingwood

Today, things started to heat up in the bedroom. Not in a sexual way, though; the lamp caught fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 473

You deserved it 3 299

Cursed

By Anonymous - 31/10/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, I bought a Halloween fog machine to make my front yard look spooky. I didn’t realize it would set off my house's fire alarm when I tested it before putting it on the front porch. I ended up outside in full costume while firefighters checked my “haunted” house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 134

You deserved it 387

By Bawo - 02/06/2009 01:20 - United States

Today, I was getting it on with my cute guy friend in his candlelit bedroom and we had just started tearing each other's clothes off. I decided to be coy and sexy and flip my hair to the side. As I did so, my long hair caught in the flames of his lit candles and caught half of my head on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 070

You deserved it 33 988

What's going on?

By wahhh - 08/08/2011 11:07 - United Kingdom

Today, my neighbour from across the road phoned me at work telling me there was a fire engine outside my house and a lot of smoke. I drove home in a panic, smashing a rear light on a post and getting flashed by a speed camera. It wasn't my house. The firemen were putting out a bonfire next door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 856

You deserved it 6 631

By FMLFMLFMLFML - 29/05/2009 17:52 - United States

Today, I had sex with a new guy. After we were done, he noticed my lighter on my nightstand and said "I've always wanted to try that!" He put the lighter by his butt and fart into it, producing a flame. After, when he left, I sat there, naked, mortified. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 206

You deserved it 14 887

By LadySteph12 - 29/10/2009 00:53 - Canada

Today, the guy I was seeing put candles all over his room to make things romantic. As we were getting it on, a plastic bag caught fire next to the bed. He had the brilliant idea to wave it around to put it out. Burning pieces of plastic landed on my arm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 383

You deserved it 3 340

By Anonymous - 26/12/2011 04:52 - United States

Today, a guy rang my doorbell, yelled "Happy Halloween" and then threw a bunch of leaves that he'd lit on fire at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 997

You deserved it 2 766

Sexy time

By Msmerfner - 03/08/2013 08:40 - United States - Hemet

Today, I was trying to be sexy in the bathtub for my boyfriend. I leaned back and caught my hair on fire with the candle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 482

You deserved it 16 105

By desertpunk75 - 19/01/2011 03:40 - United States

Today, my friends thought it'd be funny to hold lighters under the smoke alarms while I was sleeping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 843

You deserved it 3 169

By how - 25/07/2013 04:10 - United States - Crozier

Today, my husband managed to set fire to half of our garden setting up mosquito repellents. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 152

You deserved it 3 394

extremereviews 26

Wednesday 29 October 2014 0:17

At least you know your neighbors care about you

tigerisabelle 31

Wednesday 29 October 2014 0:19

You're pissed cause it ruined the romantic atmosphere, but at least if there ever was a fire, you'd be safe. I don't think they did anything wrong, how were they to know you were lighting torches?

Comments

laineym1 10

Wednesday 29 October 2014 4:20

Well that's awkward

SilverFoxx 19

Wednesday 29 October 2014 5:07

I don't blame them OP, Halloween torches are usually made to look like real torches.. And thus they glow and flicker just like fire. At least you have caring neighbors, you shouldn't be so hard on them just because one moment was ruined.. There will be plenty of others.. But maybe next time... Close your window.

Headcrab 29

Wednesday 29 October 2014 5:19

Well it's you who is stupid enough to light up torches inside a house. Be glad your neighbors care.

MzZombicidal 36

Wednesday 29 October 2014 7:05

In the UK flashlights are called torches.

brewmasterg 34

Wednesday 29 October 2014 5:25

If my neighbour's house is ever on fire I'll be sure to wait until it's entirely engulfed in flames and I can feel the heat for myself before I call emergency services because, well, I wouldn't want them to think I'm a ******** now would I?