Intimacy: Today, I was about to lose my virginity to my girlfriend. Unfortunately,...

By Perdito_Coño - 05/09/2014 20:55 - Australia - Quakers Hill

Today, I was about to lose my virginity to my girlfriend. Unfortunately, she started fake-moaning like a pornstar before I even entered her, totally killing the mood and my boner. She swore she hadn't moaned, accused me of not finding her attractive enough, and angrily left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 752

You deserved it 7 616

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Same thing different taste

No good

By :(( - 28/09/2013 21:24 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, I was all set to lose my virginity to my girlfriend. I was ecstatic, until she threatened to "beat the fuck" out of me if I didn't make it good for her. The actual sex was 30 seconds of me being given death glares, causing me to lose my boner, and have to leave in shame. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 436

You deserved it 8 032

What are you doing?

By dating a moron - 14/12/2014 17:30 - United States - Dearborn

Today, as I was about to lose my virginity to my girlfriend, she started doing stupidly fake moaning, which then went really high-pitched like a little girl's, killing my hard-on. She says she thought that because I'm Japanese-American, I'd only be able to come if she copied "those Japanese pornstars". FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 663

You deserved it 5 075

By Anonymous - 22/12/2013 08:45 - Canada - Richmond

Today, while going down on my girlfriend, she stopped moaning and told me to stop because she couldn't fake it anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 526

You deserved it 16 760

By fuck you, Odin, FUCK YOU - 03/03/2014 22:35 - United States - Los Angeles

Today, I was finally all set to lose my virginity. My girlfriend pushed me onto the bed and pulled off my underwear. She then made a face as if she'd just sucked on a lemon, and got up and left without a word. I haven't heard from her since. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 322

You deserved it 9 621

By Anonymous - 02/05/2015 02:22 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I lost my virginity to the girl of my dreams. I could tell she really enjoyed it, because she muttered "Well, that was disappointing." afterwards, then got dressed, said she'd made a huge mistake, and asked me not to call her again. Yep, total stud. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 013

You deserved it 4 134

A tale as old as time

By flopsy - 03/12/2010 16:19 - Australia

Today, I was about to lose my virginity. I couldn't get it up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 418

You deserved it 11 365

By ryan - 10/02/2010 15:08 - United States

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. Its was pretty good and heavy and she was moaning nicely. Then her moans got softer and softer and then nothing. She fell asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 475

You deserved it 6 827

By EliseV - 03/11/2014 18:56 - United States - Chino Hills

Today, I lost my virginity. In the middle of it, he just gave up and said he wasn't in the mood anymore. Then I had to listen about his past failed relationships for over an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 970

You deserved it 6 008

By Anonymous - 14/03/2013 16:59 - Germany - Dortmund

Today, my girlfriend and I were going to get intimate, so I masturbated before leaving my place, hoping it would help me last longer than usual. 10 minutes in, she shoved me off and started screaming at me, convinced that I've been cheating on her and practising with someone else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 730

You deserved it 10 556

By katie - 25/05/2011 08:23

Today, as my girlfriend and I were making love, and she started to moan and groan. All of a sudden, she stopped and said, "I'm lying, you suck at this." FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 973

You deserved it 19 174

alex_622 22

Saturday 6 September 2014 1:43

Sorry OP. Maybe she wasn't worth it then

RedCityScapes 5

Saturday 6 September 2014 1:49

She denied moaning? You both have ears- that was a dumb excuse. She may have been embarrassed, but that was an overreaction on her part.

Comments

shesashootinstar 6

Saturday 6 September 2014 8:40

You do know that females can ****** without being touched at all right? She might not have realized she was moaning at all. I'd be pissed if I were her too.

more4me 27

Saturday 6 September 2014 8:52

bitches be crazy.

mister_icicle 17

Saturday 6 September 2014 12:14

Great job, Don Juan. Next time, take it as a compliment.

HeartYou101 31

Saturday 6 September 2014 12:30

I cringed when I read this

graphicstyle7 17

Saturday 6 September 2014 13:12

If you're a virgin, how do you know if it's "fake" or not? Stop watching **** online and do the real thing a few times. You have a long way to go to be emotionally mature enough to be with someone anyway. If someone is moaning and you think it's fake, slow down, have a gentle talk, start again. Maybe she was worried about not being good enough.

interesting33 36

Saturday 6 September 2014 13:33

Maybe she was moaning because of the foreplay?

granCanyon 12

Saturday 6 September 2014 13:43

Maybe she was very aroused. Vaginal sex is not the only way to make a girl have an ******. Actually many women won't achieve an ****** with just penetration. You don't even know if she was faking. Some people can make weird noises during intercourse. You are probably both young and this must have been very awkward for her too. I think you handled it very badly. Even if she was faking then you don't know why she did it. Maybe she was scared that she's not good enough or that she's doing something wrong. If her noises were so distracting you could have started kissing her.

DarkStorm2Bad 14

Saturday 6 September 2014 14:06

Am I the only one who read it like this?: "I was finally about to bone my girlfriend, but then she moaned in a way that killed my mood; she told me she never moaned an' that I don't find her sexy enough, an' then said there was no way."