Transportation: Today, I was driving down the road at about 10pm, when the passenger...

By Aether - 03/05/2009 21:17 - United States

Today, I was driving down the road at about 10pm, when the passenger in the car in front of me threw something out the window. The object flew towards and landed directly on my windshield. It was a condom. A used condom. It wasn't tied. Semen spreads out quite a bit when you're driving fast. FML

I agree, your life sucks 136 973

You deserved it 7 608

Christmas: Snowy Joys and Blunders
Enjoy Christmas stories where unexpected gifts and family reunions create lasting memories... and fun! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By anonymous - 27/12/2011 22:32 - United States

Today, I was driving home from work when I saw the woman in the car in front of me throw something out the window. Only when it landed on my windshield did I realize what it was. A bloody tampon. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 484

You deserved it 2 658

The gift

By bubblensuds1 - 28/10/2009 04:22 - United States

Today, someone left a used condom under the windshield wiper of my car. I didn't notice it until I was driving. And it was raining. It was even tied, so the contents couldn't leak out. I'm not planning artificial insemination anytime soon, but thanks for the thought. Man, I love college. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 795

You deserved it 3 101

Road rage gone feral

By 16590 - 15/06/2012 22:13 - Sweden

Today, while I was driving home, some jackass in an open-top sports car overtook us and flipped me off. Just as I overtook him in turn, my wife rolled down her window, pulled out her tampon, and launched it at the kid. I'm not sure who was more horrified, me or him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 340

You deserved it 4 850

Why would you stick that there?

By Co-B - 03/09/2009 20:59 - United States

Today, my girlfriend reached into my pocket to get my keys so she could get something out of my car. When she yanked them out, the condom that we'd just used flew up into the air and landed on the floor in front of her entire family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 886

You deserved it 61 114

By Anonymous - 24/02/2014 15:21 - United States

Today, I was driving along, and went to spit out my window. My window was up. This happened in heavy traffic. People saw. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 077

You deserved it 51 911

By Jake - 02/10/2012 11:52 - United States - Athens

Today, I woke up with a used condom on my face. Turns out my roommate had sex with his girlfriend during the night and instead of getting up and throwing it away, he decided to throw it across the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 607

You deserved it 2 812

By Anonymous - 12/08/2019 04:01

Today, in my tidy, small-town neighborhood, I parked my car 50 metres further back from my usual spot just across from our house on a half-empty public street, because it was taken. Apparently, someone didn't appreciate this. So much so, they put a used condom under my windshield wiper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 507

You deserved it 132

By Anonymous - 24/04/2014 15:35 - United Kingdom - Montrose

Today, I got my car cleaned. As I drove home, the passenger of the van in front of me vomited out the window. The vomit sailed back and splattered all over the front of my car. A waste of £10 and a mental image that will never go away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 235

You deserved it 3 417

By Username - 13/05/2011 08:13

Today, I was driving along when the car in front of me ran over an animal. I only realised this when a chunk of flesh and blood landed on my windscreen. I put my wipers on to get rid of it but instead it got stuck underneath the wipers and smeared all over the screen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 857

You deserved it 6 735

Emotional rollercoaster

By ehcanadianeh - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - Canada - Toronto

Today, I found $20 under my car seat, so I put it in the cup holder, only for it to fly out of the window while going down the highway. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 001

You deserved it 12 360

PlasticShark 0

Monday 4 May 2009 1:10

today's going to be sunny with light semen showers

Serial 2

Monday 4 May 2009 1:10

at least you weren't driving a convertible

Comments

dragonmystik3030 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 12:20

as rodney rude said. Oh my god i been hit by a flying ****. lol

meta_knight_486 5

Tuesday 5 May 2009 13:50

Dude... how does that even HAPPEN? Life can be full of surprises... but nobody said that they were all good... :/

DeeJayD 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 19:31

I hope you got their license plate number and reported them for littering.

wanderingidiot 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 20:16

LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOLLLLLLL number (#) 11!!!! hahahahhahahaha!

serendipitieee 0

Tuesday 5 May 2009 20:56

maybe it was a sign from the heavens..... "stop sexually depriving yourself, here's a treat!" >.>

BBstfu82 0

Wednesday 6 May 2009 0:23

haha if those stupid people in that car actually got pregnate, thatd be a funny story to tell the kid when he got older.. that is pretty messed up though

bubs_AKA_vermin 0

Wednesday 6 May 2009 2:49

eeeeeeewwww! rofl 226.

Always_And_Never 0

Wednesday 6 May 2009 2:49

That Sucks, I guess safe sex is dangerous for everyone else, and WTF puts YDI, no one deserves a **** filled condom flying at them

aggieskate900 0

Wednesday 6 May 2009 3:10

This is how Smart Cars were invented. One of these used un-closed-off condoms landed on a rollerskate, and it just stayed pregnant for the rest of its existence! Thus you have your Pregnant Rollerskate (a.k.a smart car)