Miscellaneous: Today, I was going on a first date with a girl I really like....

By harrysolo - 19/07/2009 01:26 - United States

Today, I was going on a first date with a girl I really like. We were going to see the new Harry Potter movie, and she told me she was getting all dressed up. It was only after I picked her up I realized she meant that she was dressing nicely. I was dressed as Harry Potter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 572

You deserved it 65 212

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Same thing different taste

Weird movie choice

By Anonymous - 09/05/2021 00:01

Today, I had my first ever date. He invited me to dinner and a movie. Then he put on "The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo." I couldn’t think of an excuse to get out, so I had to wait till the end of the film. FML

I agree, your life sucks 738

You deserved it 379

Overenthusiastic

By Sash - 06/04/2012 21:04 - United Kingdom

Today, I dressed up for a date. After waiting for hours, sending countless texts and voice mails to my date, and thinking I'd been stood up, I remembered my date is actually scheduled for tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 620

You deserved it 38 368

By toastedguy - 01/12/2009 05:00 - United States

Today, I went on my first date in a long time. We went to see "New Moon." After the girl stole my hat, I grabbed her phone. While trying to get it back, she held a lighter to me, threatening me. Next thing I know my beard is on fire, so not only did I have to sit through horrible acting, I got burnt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 660

You deserved it 13 158

When love breaks down

By sadday - 20/11/2009 08:25 - United States

Today, I was planning on going on a date with a girl I've really liked. She told me today was the only we could hang out before her trip. I got an expensive hair cut, planned on cooking her dinner, and pulled a few strings and got on the list for a big concert. Turns out she'd rather go shopping FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 076

You deserved it 4 017

By MCKilllerrr - 18/01/2011 05:05 - United States

Today, the girl I really liked started talking to me, so I asked her out on a date. After waiting an hour at the theatre, I texted her asking where she was. She replied with, "Oh! You were serious about the date?!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 784

You deserved it 3 524

By waterspike - 29/01/2010 13:18 - France

Today, after finally getting a date with the girl I like, she invited her new boyfriend along as well. I ended up paying for their first date. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 797

You deserved it 9 979

Pleased to meet y'all

By rokkstarrrVRV - 28/12/2013 08:42 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I took a girl on a date. Her and her imaginary friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 329

You deserved it 5 165

Matching

By Anonymous - 23/02/2023 02:00

Today, I went on a first date with a guy I met online. I arrived early and waited for him for over an hour. When he finally showed up, he was wearing the exact same outfit as me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 722

You deserved it 200

By beachbumb8538 - 15/07/2011 17:01 - United States

Today, I had to do a "damage report" on myself after going to the midnight premiere of Harry Potter. As I was waiting for the previews, a 20 year old man dressed as a house elf tackled and wrestled me for my seat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 750

You deserved it 5 271

First date from hell

By lizzardbreath - 31/03/2009 10:44 - United States

Today, I went on a first date with a guy I don't know very well. He told me to dress in formal attire, so I assumed he was taking me to a nice dinner. He took me to his brother's wedding, and introduced me as "The One" to his entire family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 115 874

You deserved it 7 944

qwerty23 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 9:14

Well, I'm a girl, and I would totally dress up as Harry Potter. Just not for a first date. :P

Junaeffer 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 9:15

haha i wanna know what happened when she saw you! that's cute that you got dressed up though, it was just a misunderstanding[: you'll be okay

Comments

Boweezee 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 9:22

Nice one! I dressed up and went to the Midnight showing with my boyfriend. Maybe she found it funny and thy you have a sense of humor. (:

whitneyyy 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 9:22

Hahah that's cute,if it's real

effthis 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 9:23

******* nerd.. get a life

Alex_Wilko 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 11:39

Dosen't he have a life if he went on a date? And chill out.

zaooza 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 9:23

wow..hope she has a sense of humor..

heymcfly53 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 9:25

I would have dressed up like Luna. You have nothing to worry about (:

fml_08_23_93 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 9:25

haha wow i would have thought it was cute =]

PimpDaddyT 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 9:26

damn third. yeah man don't dress like a dork on a 1st date. ydi

Smallworld_fml 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 9:26

Fail. Epic.

Ray_of_midnight 22

Sunday 19 July 2009 9:26

If she disapproves then she's probably not right for you. Forget her and move on.

gorbagil 0

Sunday 19 July 2009 9:27

Wow ydi nerdy retard

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Today, I told my wife I had a huge Zoom interview and could not be disturbed under any circumstances. Nevertheless, she called her mom, got into a screaming argument the interviewer could clearly hear, then came into my office to cry on my shoulder. She doesn't understand why I'm furious with her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 642

You deserved it 78

Today, yet again I had to lie to a date about what I do for a living, because every time I tell someone the truth, that I work in private equity, they have some choice words about "people like me ruining things" and "ruining the housing prices." I feel like an evil James Bond or something. FML

I agree, your life sucks 153

You deserved it 547

The Top

Today, I got a very accusatory phone call from my daughter's teacher. According to my daughter, I absolutely refuse to let her eat in the morning. In reality, I told her it’s her responsibility to get herself up and get breakfast on her own before we leave. My daughter is 17 years old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 345

You deserved it 237

Today, my neighbors called the police and said that they saw, through the window, a suspicious person in my house doing something to my piano. The "suspicious person" was me, in my own house, playing my own piano. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 579

You deserved it 2 843

Today, my boyfriend and I are going on vacation to Panama. When we landed, our suitcases were missing and the airline has no clue where they are. It’s 32 degrees Celsius outside, and all we have is our winter jackets and a pair of jeans. FML

I agree, your life sucks 751

You deserved it 131

Today, due to medication I am taking that causes constipation, I have become all too accustomed to using a disposable rubber glove to dig crap out of my own butthole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 171

You deserved it 2 426

Today, is the day I got my first tattoo. It's also the day where my mom screamed at me, gave me the silent treatment, and kicked me out of the house. Apparently I’m not considered her daughter anymore, because my skin is “damaged” now. I don’t have other family anywhere, and I have nowhere to go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 404

You deserved it 561

Today, during one of my final exams at university, the police academy across from the class decided to practice their marching. With the full band of bagpipes. For the entire 3 hours. I have a headache verging on migraine and start humming the marching beat occasionally. FML

I agree, your life sucks 901

You deserved it 88

Same thing different taste

Weird movie choice

Overenthusiastic

When love breaks down

Pleased to meet y'all

Matching

First date from hell

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