Miscellaneous: Today, I was hanging out with some friends, and I had to take...

By Anonymous - 22/04/2013 18:33 - United States

Today, I was hanging out with some friends, and I had to take a dump. After I was done, I realized there was no more toilet paper, so I asked my friends to get me some. They threw in duct tape, sandpaper, and saran wrap, and told me to make a decision. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 918

You deserved it 8 678

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Shit for brains

By Anonymous - 31/10/2023 15:00 - Australia - Brisbane

Today, in desperate need of a shit, I quickly ran into a shop to buy toilet paper. I rushed home and unleashed, only to realise I'd bought paper towels. Without options, I had to wipe my ass with them and consequently blocked the toilet. I found rolls of toilet paper while looking for the plunger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 182

You deserved it 653

By FUCKFACECUNT - 02/08/2015 13:32 - United Arab Emirates - Abu Dhabi

Today, I took a dump at work, when I realized there was no toilet paper left. There was another guy in the room, so I asked him for some. He decided he'd rather dump all the rolls of paper into the other toilets, before wishing me luck and walking out while laughing his ass off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 684

You deserved it 2 388

By CallmeEddie - 14/11/2013 16:44 - United States - Joliet

Today, while I was in a bathroom stall, the guy next to me asked me for toilet paper. It was then that I realized I didn't have any either. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 891

You deserved it 4 909

Confinement, episode 3774

By S3XY_SiNG3R - 11/04/2020 02:00

Today, I woke up to use the restroom, because I had to take a shit. There was basically no toilet paper left. I asked my boyfriend if he could go get some. It was 1 a.m. He said he’d go when the stores were open, then told me to just rinse off in the shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 790

You deserved it 2 067

TW: Gross

By sweet_stufz - 11/11/2010 13:30 - Canada

Today, I was in a public washroom and I had to take a dump. I knew how dirty the toilets were, so tried to do the "stand and poo." Unfortunately, I slipped and the poo fell on the ground. Then I realized there were no paper towels. There was a line outside waiting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 651

You deserved it 38 899

By Anonymous - 27/08/2011 23:07 - Canada

Today, I took a dump without checking for toilet paper. I then called my step dad, who said "use the stuff in the garbage." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 504

You deserved it 5 644

By Anonymous - 15/06/2015 02:54 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I was drying myself with a towel after a shower when I noticed a bad smell. After running out of toilet paper last night, one of my friends decided to use my clean towel to wipe herself instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 680

You deserved it 2 410

By Anonymous - 19/01/2011 05:45 - United States

Today, I was going to the bathroom at my boyfriend's house. I had awful diarrhea and was almost done, when I noticed a spider on the ground. Being terrified, I took a giant ball of toilet paper to kill it. I realized then that I had no toilet paper left to use. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 714

You deserved it 35 128

Always check before

By Anonymous - 19/05/2017 14:00

Today, the stall I was using didn't have any toilet paper in it. Being the immature idiot I am, I was too embarrassed to ask for someone to grab me some. So I waited 45 minutes for the bathroom to be empty and crept into the next stall, only to find it was also out of toilet paper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 694

You deserved it 952

By penguinsfan - 16/05/2009 14:47 - Canada

Today, I had to pee badly. I went into a stall and sat down. Only until after I'd peed, I realized that I didn't have any toilet paper. I waddled to the next stall with my pants down to get more toilet paper, believing that the bathroom was empty. It wasn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 129

You deserved it 53 798

your_ma 27

Monday 22 April 2013 23:06

How could you post this without telling us what you picked?!

liv_graham 7

Monday 22 April 2013 23:06

use their towels

Comments

TheHeavyOne 15

Tuesday 23 April 2013 2:52

YDI, it amazes me how anyone can sit down for a deuce & not look to see if there is tp first.

dovehigh 15

Wednesday 4 February 2015 16:09

sometimes people are so rushed to get in there before they need themselves that there isn't time to notice its gone.

INDYSTRUCTABLE 43

Tuesday 23 April 2013 2:58

tape the sandpaper & cover it in a wrap lol.

ahinners 11

Tuesday 23 April 2013 3:03

Use your sock

finch01 18

Tuesday 23 April 2013 3:34

use the show curtin

allisadawn91 8

Tuesday 23 April 2013 3:46

Whatever you picked, it better have gone down the toilet lol

ronnie220 11

Tuesday 23 April 2013 3:49

I hope the Saran wrap won!

MemeGuy99 5

Tuesday 23 April 2013 4:06

Either use the back of the duct tape, folded in half, or tape it to the back and front of the sand paper, and wipe. Or just use the back of the sand paper. :)

KnifeStuff 8

Tuesday 23 April 2013 4:17

I can't stand the feel of sandpaper

unixdude 9

Tuesday 23 April 2013 4:23

If it is their house, just drag your ass across the carpet like a dog does. You get bonus point for marking your territory as well as asserting your dominance of the pack. And, your turdcutter won't be a foul pit of despair.