Health: Today, I was in a video chat with an old friend who I haven't...

By Poop - 02/10/2009 01:09 - United States

Today, I was in a video chat with an old friend who I haven't talked to in years, and my mom walks in. The first thing she says is, "Did you close the toilet after you pooped? Cause today on the news I heard that your poop particles can fly up to 25 feet, landing on your toothbrush." FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 991

You deserved it 3 215

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Same thing different taste

By me - 08/06/2012 14:00 - United States - Carthage

Today, I was taking a shower. My mom thinks it's ok to just walk in on someone when they are in there so she decides to take a crap. The worst part is she thought it would be less awkward to talk to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 488

You deserved it 2 711

Not now!

By Anonymous - 18/04/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, my mom decided to infodump on me as I came home needing to take a shit. She wouldn't stop talking and calling me back when I tried to walk off. I couldn't get a word in, and she was ignoring my gestures. She's now calling me disrespectful because I finally ran off and dropped a loud one in the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 449

You deserved it 95

By ok cool - 13/10/2015 01:53 - United States - Fayetteville

Today, while I was in the bathroom my mom walked in and tried to have a conversation with me about my bowel movements. I'm 23, and this is a regular thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 153

You deserved it 2 888

By seaweedlady - 21/06/2011 14:49 - United States

Today, my mother tried to have a conversation with me. While she was taking a piss. With the bathroom door wide open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 989

You deserved it 4 875

By June - 19/05/2009 21:51 - Canada

Today, I thought I could stay on the phone and go to the bathroom without him noticing. My mom knocks on the door and without even thinking, I yelled "I'M ON THE TOILET!" He said "ew.." FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 627

You deserved it 74 789

By FUUUUCK - 11/02/2014 20:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I was Skyping with a guy I'm really into. I'm not supposed to Skype at night, so when I heard my mum coming, I minimized the window. She walked in before I could mute my mic and started bitching me out for flushing my tampons down the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 454

You deserved it 26 072

Open door policy

By Anonymous - 09/03/2021 23:01

Today, my mom yelled at me for not pooping with the bathroom door open like the rest of the family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 210

You deserved it 78

Well did you?

By Kagura - 02/06/2010 15:05 - Turkey

Today, I went shopping with my mother. I needed to use the toilet, so entered a restaurant. After I left the toilet, my mother, who was near the restaurant's entrance, called out and asked, "Did you flush it?" Everyone heard her. And I'm 22 years old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 347

You deserved it 3 826

By Alisha - 07/08/2012 18:04 - United States - Fredericksburg

Today, I visited my mother's new apartment, and found a picture of yours truly hanging above her toilet, and I asked why it was there. She shrugged and said, "Because the thought of you makes me want to take a shit?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 176

You deserved it 2 345

Dump the dump

By lily anne - 30/01/2022 02:00

Today, my mom screamed my name five times while I was on the toilet. When I was done, I went to her and she said, “Why the FUCK did you not immediately drop what you were doing and rush to help me with the dishes?” Apparently, the fact that I was pooping wasn’t a good enough excuse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 443

You deserved it 144

allmidnighteyes 10

Friday 2 October 2009 9:36

Well, Orbit is always there to use afterwards. I'd still like to know where the hell they tested shit particles flying up in a parabolic arc 25 feet into the air though.

null_fml 11

Friday 2 October 2009 9:47

Well, at least your old friend has a reason not to talk to you for years again.

Comments

VR369 0

Friday 2 October 2009 18:22

actually its 6 feet, not 25

fuxkthis2 0

Friday 2 October 2009 18:41

Yeah 43, I was just about to type the same thing. They had it on MANswers...but hey maybe they found it could travel farther.

xolexie_rae16 0

Friday 2 October 2009 21:31

haha.. just about to say that.

j_rock1981 0

Friday 2 October 2009 21:52

I said that like 30 comments ago

AllFrackedUp 0

Friday 2 October 2009 20:51

maybe you shouldn't be living with your mother then you ******* idiot get off your lazy ass get a ******* job an move out you ******* idiot

israelnotjacob 20

Friday 2 October 2009 21:12

You know, your mom actually is right. Why the frick is it that most people think the toilet lid is just for decoration or something? It's there for a reason. Particles of crap do spray out when you flush, and when you leave it open that's just a good way to drop things in there. It's amazing that most people don't know enough to just use the lid. They are meant to serve a purpose.

DameGreyWulf 0

Saturday 3 October 2009 1:48

You should have said another stool fact. Like how you can have a heart attack and die if you take too big of a dump.

DangerousBabee 0

Saturday 3 October 2009 3:09

lol i heard that on MANswers.

guy_on_the_couch 0

Saturday 3 October 2009 3:16

Lmao That's so random! Awesome!

Moemoemoe_fml 0

Saturday 3 October 2009 7:05

Mythbusters is nothing but crap, #7. Mythbusters will also fly and attach to your toothbrush, even.

d_a_i_s_e_e 0

Saturday 3 October 2009 7:41

I'm sorry this has nothing to do with this story, but whats with the people that put 'you totally deserved it' on stories like these? how the hell did he totally deserve it? i just dont understand :| but funny story ahha