By benander - 15/09/2009 21:14 - United States

Spicy
Today, I was in the bathroom defecating when I felt something hanging there. I reached back with toilet paper and starting pulling it out inch by inch; 3 feet later I learned I had a tapeworm. Worst of all, no pharmacy has the med the doctor prescribed. I have to live with this thing until the med gets here. FML
I agree, your life sucks 69 015
You deserved it 4 113
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Top comments

LOLYLIF 0

I hope to ******* God no one does a comic for this one.

137 6

Comments

the_stereotype 0

@26, i think he meant that if he couldn't actually feel any physical pain, it would be a little be easier to ignore but that is just eww...that thing has gotten all the way down your digestive tract

3 0
BlueBomber 0

BLARG. Tapeworms are some seriously disgusting creatures. FYL, I've known a few people who have had them. English Trolls: please, PLEASE shut the **** up. Take a cue from the Taoists: "He who speaks does not know. But he who knows does not speak." If you're so damn smart, show us by writing an eloquent post instead of throwing your shit at the wall and howling. GodDAMMIT.

24 1
anil6057 0

that's disturbing. I heard that you can put a piece of meat in front of your mouth or I guess asshole and lure the tapeworm out of your body.

1 14
Ree_rel 0

It's a parasit.. do you even know what that is?

2 0
WoWoWoWoWo 0

Actually, you can. Sort of. If you don't eat anything for a day or two, then hold some smelly food - milk, peanut butter, meat - in front of your mouth, the tapeworm will smell it and might try to crawl up your esophagus and reach out your mouth to get it. At which point you (or a friend, since you won't be able to pull too far from your own mouth) grab it by its head, whip it out, fling it across the room, and take pictures.

17 1
Amysbodybetrayal 0

I believe that's what the tapeworm said.

37 0
Amysbodybetrayal 0

Glad I could help. :] xD

2 0
Khiash 6

LOL But OP, FYL bigtime. That must be absolutely awful x.x

0 0
oh_dear34 0

#247, I think you are thinking of pin worms. Pin worms are tiny parasitic worms that live in your rectum. They can cause your anus to itch horribly. Tapeworms do not bother one like that.

1 0
thelovelykira 0

Dude. This is a huge FML. they are so gross D: Im sorry you had one :/

3 0
maryoceanblue 0

eww that's nasty! do u feel it at all inside of u? did u name it?

3 1
Bud_fml 16

Pull it out the rest of the way?

2 0
ohboy456 0

It's attached to his intestines. If he could physically pull it out (which I'm pretty sure he couldn't because of the way they attach themselves with teeth-like projections), he would seriously cause some damage.

2 0
kjraynor 0

If u drink a tiny bit of cyanite not enough to kill u but to paralyze your stomach for a couple of hours the tapeworm will detach and be excreted during a bowel movement.

0 5
ihatestupidppl 0

Cyanide? I would not trust myself to put *any* amount of that in my system.

3 0
Chibi_fml 9

That sounds about as reputable as "you can't get pregnant if you douche with coke after sex".

9 0
DrunkenValor 0

This sounds like the awesome basis of a sitcom...! "Meet Charlie, he lives with a tapeworm, lets find out what happens when Charlies friends come round for a pool party...!" *insert studio applauds.*

0 2
Mignun 0

I gagged a bit. I haven't met anyone who's had a tape worm, but hopefully it'll be gone soon. At least you're alive, and it hasn't moved on to organs. Wish you luck in getting better! =/

2 0