Money: Today, I was playing at a bingo hall, when I got a bingo for... - FML

By greenhide8 - 28/05/2011 05:27 - United States

Today, I was playing at a bingo hall, when I got a bingo for $50. I got so excited that I accidentally yelled, "Holy fuck!" They kicked me out. I didn't get the money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 014

You deserved it 46 119

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Same thing different taste

By winner winner chicken dinner - 26/09/2018 05:00

Today, I finally won at bingo after playing every Thursday night for months. It was a $750 bingo. I split with 85 other winners. My share was $8. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 759

You deserved it 632

By Anonymous - 20/02/2016 08:21 - United States - Pomona

Today, I went to a bingo club with my gran and won the second game and a butthurt old lady accused me of cheating. I ended up being taken aside by an apologetic member of staff and asked to leave. I'm still trying to figure out how you can even cheat at bingo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 924

You deserved it 1 452

Bingo is serious business

By earlytermination - 06/09/2015 03:31 - United States

Today, I was visiting my grandmother at her retirement community. Bingo is really popular there and she loves it, so I went thinking it would be a fun activity for us. I won the jackpot and my car got keyed by a group of angry old people. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 088

You deserved it 2 461

By Anonymous - 11/08/2012 14:20 - United Kingdom - Bishops Stortford

Today, my social anxiety hit a new low. I was playing bingo and, although I won, I didn't shout "bingo" because I thought too many people would look at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 497

You deserved it 8 898

Dopamine rush

By thiscantbereal00 - 07/01/2022 14:02

Today, I went to the casino and put $500 into a game and lost it all. I tried another $100 and won it all back, plus some. Instead of walking out ahead, I kept trying to hit bigger and ended up losing all my rent money. Rent is due and now I can’t pay it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 165

You deserved it 3 692

By goodbye sweet internet - 06/07/2013 18:23 - Greece - Athens

Today, after playing numerous games of poker against my friend, and him telling me that I'm the best poker player he's ever met, I went out and played for real money. I got totally destroyed, lost all of my money, and was laughed out of the building. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 377

You deserved it 50 203

By Anonymous - 11/10/2010 09:07 - Canada

Today, I scratched a lottery ticket I had gotten for my birthday and won $10,000. In celebration, I jumped up and raised my hands directly into a ceiling fan. Oh, and it was a fake ticket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 385

You deserved it 6 088

By aianmoo16 - 01/05/2016 21:52 - United States - Chicago

Today, I was at a mini arcade and accidentally put a hundred dollar bill through the quarter machine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 444

You deserved it 9 200

Wanker

By sourgirl101 - 01/03/2023 06:00

Today, while buying lottery tickets, I mixed up "jackpot" and "scratch off" and asked for "$10 worth of jackoffs." FML

I agree, your life sucks 417

You deserved it 553

By janedoe - 12/02/2009 22:21 - United States

Today, I was volunteering at a nursing home calling bingo numbers. One woman stood up and started making noises, so I assumed she had won and started clapping. She then fell on the floor and died of a heart attack. I essentially applauded her death. FML

I agree, your life sucks 91 811

You deserved it 12 748

Next

Top comments

AScic1 3

Saturday 28 May 2011 11:53

You're a swearing, iPhone using elderly person?

tpike1296 11

Saturday 28 May 2011 11:58

Well, you'll need a holy **** to feel better after this.

Comments

rofl99 0

Sunday 29 May 2011 9:17

wow r u serious... u where playing at a bingo hall??? lol xD Srry... hehe

nerualyma 6

Sunday 29 May 2011 14:50

make that a nan facebook group :P

waterboy14 7

Sunday 29 May 2011 17:38

Oh crazy old people how I love all of you ^^

nismo1992 0

Sunday 29 May 2011 17:49

money grows on trees because money is paper and paper is made of trees

darcimckeown 3

Monday 30 May 2011 22:56

wow! 50$? NO WAY! if you're that excited over 50$ why don't you get a job? I wonder how you wouldve reacted to 75$

Datenstreber 4

Tuesday 31 May 2011 0:12

you are suppose to say BINGO, not Holy F**K. lol

lolrofl69 0

Tuesday 31 May 2011 4:22

**** your self :)

EnterChoose 1

Friday 3 June 2011 15:45

Should've saved yourself like... Holy FUUU...ge.

megan98387 0

Wednesday 8 June 2011 7:52

awww that's sad lol

Zuuk 0

Sunday 12 June 2011 23:02

BINGO!

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Keywords

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The Top

Today, my thieving, layabout stepmom planted weed in my bedroom and showed my dad. Well, maybe I'm jumping to conclusions here, but her smirk and telling me later that I shouldn't fuck with her again seems conclusive to me. Goodbye freedom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 128

You deserved it 3 083

Today, my parents told me that unless I think about my behaviour and make some real changes, people are going to think I’m weird or suspicious, and I’ll never make friends. This is because I choose to attend church on Sundays instead of watching TV and getting drunk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 386

You deserved it 273

The Top

Today, at work, I dropped a heavy block of lead on my hand. On my hunt for ice, I had to tell my manager - who told her manager, who told the chief - in the end, the whole department found out and they made me fill in two long-arsed incident reports. I had to fill them in myself with my busted up hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 996

You deserved it 3 276

Today, my idiot boyfriend, who thinks he's an outdoorsman, made sauce from mushrooms he'd foraged. I refused to eat it. He got upset and had two helpings. He's now in bed, whining about how bad he feels. Stupid dumbass. FML

I agree, your life sucks 876

You deserved it 181

Today, I felt like cheating on my diet and ordered a pizza. My mom and my sister were napping, so I put in the delivery notes, “Please don’t knock.” The delivery guy knocked anyway. LOUD. My mom and sister got up and saw everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 418

You deserved it 1 275

Today, I went to a nice restaurant with my grandfather, who kept telling me to be kind towards our waiter, as he was probably just starting his summer job. The same waiter who, as my granddad had probably forgotten, had brought us our food six months ago and was now standing four feet away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 355

You deserved it 211

Today, I went to go give my boss a high five for a job well done. I missed his hand and accidentally slapped his ass on the way down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 887

You deserved it 12 554

Today, I received a phone call from my son's school. Apparently, for the past week he has been telling everyone "mummy works as a drug dealer." I'm a pharmacist. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 406

You deserved it 3 329