Love: Today, I was propositioned by an incredibly pretty girl. I'm...

By Junktown - 07/07/2011 14:40 - Israel

Today, I was propositioned by an incredibly pretty girl. I'm a 24 year old virgin; she's my best mate's girlfriend. She tells him everything when drunk, and he's a black-belt in karate. This could officially be classified as torture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 673

You deserved it 6 342

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By Brennan Lebrun - 18/05/2018 05:00

Today, I went to my best friend's house to propose to my girlfriend of 6 years. When I walked in, she was having sex with my best friend's 37-year-old brother. She then yelled, ”You should have knocked first!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 924

You deserved it 369

Awkward conversation

By anon - 28/12/2019 05:00 - United States - La Puente

Today, I had to have a very difficult and awkward conversation with my best friend about her fiancé hitting on me. She seemed completely unfazed and ended up admitting that a three-way with me was actually her idea, but she didn't want to "weird me out" by asking me about it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 622

You deserved it 378

Catch 22

By Anonymous - 26/03/2021 20:01

Today, I was at a friend's house; she left the room for a few minutes. Her dad then put me in a headlock and told me that I'd, "better treat his daughter right if I ever wanted to walk again," because she's in love with me. I'm a gay guy, and she knows. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 071

You deserved it 104

Read the room

By Anonymous - 28/02/2024 05:00 - United States - Maryland Heights

Today, I proposed to the girl of my dreams. She asked me who I was, and maced me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 90

You deserved it 1 228

By whattheactualfuck - 22/01/2016 12:50 - South Africa - Durban

Today, my new girlfriend's father made good on his "What you do to her I do to you" threat when he took me out for drinks and then drunkenly hit on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 848

You deserved it 3 407

By Anonymous - 27/09/2009 02:18 - United States

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend with the cliché of the diamond ring in a champagne glass. Apparently there was an off-duty police officer across the room watching me slip the ring into the glass. He thought I was slipping in a date-rape drug and tackled me down before I could propose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 55 162

You deserved it 4 423

Conundrum

By Anonymous - 04/05/2021 04:01

Today, my best friend is completely head-over-heels for his girlfriend, has been buying her very expensive stuff and gave her the ring of compromise after 4 years of relationship. The problem is, I just found out that the girlfriend has been sexting with someone else, and is sure to dump my friend for that guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 017

You deserved it 141

By ohwell - 24/11/2014 13:44 - Sweden - Tullinge

Today, I met my best friend's girlfriend for the first time. After a few hours of talking and eating, she followed me to the bathroom and said, dead serious, ''If you ever touch him or get too close to him, I will cut you''. I've known him for twelve years, they have been dating for a month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 937

You deserved it 3 305

By Anonymous - 09/12/2012 14:53 - United States - Conroe

Today, my boyfriend of 4 years drunkenly introduced me to another very special lady. His wife. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 352

You deserved it 3 771

All kinds of wrong

By Anonymous - 16/06/2020 14:01

Today, while at my friend's house, she had to leave the room for a few minutes. Her dad then put me in a headlock and told me that I had "better treat his daughter right if I ever wanted to walk again," because she's in love with me. Then he left. I'm a gay guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 796

You deserved it 200

InsidiousChild 0

Thursday 7 July 2011 18:46

hit it

cowjudgesyou 0

Thursday 7 July 2011 18:49

Being a black belt means nothing anymore: schools give out belts to anyone willing to put in the money. go for it

Comments

IloveRec 0

Wednesday 6 June 2012 7:50

Say she raped you. If that doesn't work get a baseball bat.

amyrules99 7

Sunday 12 August 2012 15:37

Here's a thought... don't have sex with her? If you're a big enough jerk to sleep with your best friend's girlfriend then YDI if she gets drunk and tells him