Love: Today, I was startled awake at 4am by a loud and awful sound....

By Anonymous - 01/02/2011 13:43 - United States

Today, I was startled awake at 4am by a loud and awful sound. Completely serious, I asked my fiancé if he had just shit his pants. His response: giggles followed by a softly whispered "maybe". FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 150

You deserved it 5 332

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Same thing different taste

Rude awakening

By Anonymous - 08/04/2020 23:00

Today, I was woken up at 4 in the morning by my boyfriend farting on my leg and giggling in his sleep. For the third time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 546

You deserved it 254

Single shot

By irulan - 14/01/2020 03:00 - United Kingdom - London

Today, I farted so loudly in bed and I woke up my husband. Startled, he thought that someone was entered in our room and fired a shot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 540

You deserved it 599

Flatulophobia

By Anonymous - 18/12/2021 07:01 - United States - Watford City

Today, while in bed with my husband, we were discussing our fears. Mine being the Doomsday Clock. He giggled and made me feel silly about my (rational if you ask me) fear. I let out a tiny toot, and he jumped and screamed bloody murder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 825

You deserved it 227

By Anonymous - 06/01/2012 15:50 - United States

Today, while in bed with my boyfriend, I accidentally let one slip. While thinking "maybe he didn't hear, maybe he's sleeping", the shaking of the bed from his laughter let me know otherwise. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 538

You deserved it 9 415

By sleepylillion - 25/04/2016 05:07 - United States - Eleele

Today, I woke up to the sound of my boyfriend chuckling to himself. Turns out he had just clogged the toilet. When he called maintenance, halfway through explaining the problem he started hysterically giggling and had to hang up mid-sentence. This has been a reoccurring theme. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 237

You deserved it 1 537

By SkinsCastSelection - 17/01/2011 09:53 - France

Today, in the middle of the night, my girlfriend whispered "Are you asleep?" I chose not to respond, to see what she'd do. She then let rip a loud, stinking fart, giggled, and went back to sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 113

You deserved it 41 514

By Mel - 07/05/2011 22:27 - United States

Today, my fire alarm startled me so badly that I shit myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 972

You deserved it 12 963

By embarrassed2 - 24/01/2011 02:47 - United States

Today, my boyfriend tickled me. In between laughs, I warned him that I was going to pee myself. He didn't believe me. After I actually did, he suggested we use a "safety word" from now on so that he will know when I'm being serious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 969

You deserved it 4 795

By Secretlypossessed - 29/10/2018 03:00

Today, I was awoken to a punch in the face. My boyfriend said I was giggling in my sleep and he thought I was possessed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 974

You deserved it 293

By fartz - 31/08/2013 06:04 - United States

Today, while I was sleeping, apparently I rolled over towards my fiancé and told him "We gotta save the turtles!" and had a five seconds long fart. Now he won't stop making fun of me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 520

You deserved it 8 107

Frickmetinajenks 0

Tuesday 1 February 2011 19:03

Lol, get used to it. It won't be as funny a couple years into marriage.

TheB0a 5

Tuesday 1 February 2011 19:22

The giggles is what makes this funny. Who giggles after supposedly ******** their pants, lolZ.

Comments

Adailin 0

Monday 21 February 2011 17:01

this sounds like it just came out of family guy lmao ! I would of gone him n said I "maybe" farted in your face...

kaystarz32 0

Tuesday 22 February 2011 8:47

ew. gross.

daaron 3

Wednesday 23 March 2011 5:53

haha lol fat bastard classic give the guy props for doing that

mzled24 0

Saturday 9 April 2011 2:20

wait that's actually reeeaallly funny!

massnerder420 4

Wednesday 20 April 2011 0:47

I LMAO-ed.

bkpost36 0

Saturday 23 April 2011 5:41

bahahahahahahahaha

callmesillyxxx 1

Tuesday 3 May 2011 7:36

lmao

Talestair 0

Monday 16 May 2011 4:01

Sometimes the embarrassment of buying adult diapers isn't so embarrassing as forgetting to.

coco_puffs09 0

Wednesday 1 June 2011 7:17

lol Love it.

AwwwwYeeaaahhh 0

Thursday 9 June 2011 17:24

Is your husband, by any chance, Peter Griffin?

Keywords

Poopoo peepee Love Embarrassing Miscellaneous Romantic Christmas Break-ups Annoying Money Gross Argument Ironic Awkward Friends Cute Haircut Lonely Holidays Relatable Work Bosses Capitalism Cars You're fired Covid Health Cheating Jealousy Parenting Kids

The Top

Today, I was walking in the freezing rain when a guy asked me if I wanted to share his umbrella with him. I grinned and told him I did. He then noticed a pretty girl walking behind me and he abruptly turned to her and asked her the same question. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 973

You deserved it 2 303

Today, I was in an elevator with my girlfriend when it suddenly stopped. Thinking of being spontaneous like in all the movies, I propped her up on the railings and started getting passionate. That's when the emergency phone rang. And I discovered there was a security camera. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 331

You deserved it 41 023

The Top

Today, a few people in my class used calculators on the math final exam, even though it clearly stated at the top that they weren't allowed. The teacher found out, and now everyone has to retake the 200-question exam. I didn't even use a calculator. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 743

You deserved it 497

Today, at work, I put on a smile and went to take an elderly gentleman's order. He looked at me, asked if I'd stick a finger in his sweet tea to make it sweeter, then complained that it was a shame I wasn't "on the menu". FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 285

You deserved it 3 920

Today, I filled out an application at WalMart after being unable to find a job in three months. I just graduated from law school. With honors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 655

You deserved it 5 127

Today, it was my birthday. I finally got the PS3 I've been asking for, for a long time. When I opened the box, I didn't find a PS3, but a bunch of clothes that my mom put in my brother's PS3 box. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 036

You deserved it 4 195

Today, I found out how painful it is to static shock the tip of your dick. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 221

You deserved it 7 282

Today, I met my boyfriend's parents. I hope my charm and smile was enough for them to forgive me for not wearing pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 989

You deserved it 31 371

Same thing different taste

Rude awakening

Single shot

Flatulophobia

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