Kids: Today, I was taking a crap in a public stall when three kids...

By Anonymous - 19/04/2011 15:06 - United States

Today, I was taking a crap in a public stall when three kids broke down the door and pelted me with eggs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 149

You deserved it 6 182

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Same thing different taste

By eggs - 28/02/2009 06:30 - Canada

Today, while at work at my grocery store I sold a TON of eggs to a bunch of kids. We joked around that they were "going to bake a giant cake." When I got home I found out someone had egged my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 405

You deserved it 9 220

By Anonymous - 18/06/2019 06:44

Today, I was in a public toilet taking a dump. I then noticed someone trying to peep under the door, so I kicked them in the head as hard as I could. Turned out it was a 5-year-old looking for his parent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 973

You deserved it 1 441

By Laura - 11/03/2011 05:20 - United States

Today, I was waiting for the pan to heat up so I could make myself scrambled eggs. Just then, my mom runs up to me, cracks an egg open on my head, and runs away laughing. I only had one other egg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 568

You deserved it 4 607

By Rizmo - 25/09/2016 07:11 - United States - Cedar City

Today, I found out that the loud noise outside my bedroom a few weeks ago was neighborhood kids throwing eggs at my window, landing on the AC. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 511

You deserved it 743

Not now, Kelsey

By Amy - 01/04/2011 01:46 - United States

Today, after a huge row with my best friend at school, I hid myself away in the bathroom and quietly sobbed to myself. A kid loudly busted into the stall next to me and took a minute-long shit that sounded like a hailstorm of bullets. The putrid stench made me retch and violently throw up everywhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 713

You deserved it 7 258

By Anonymous - 07/10/2011 03:21 - United States

Today, my car got acquainted with about 3 dozen eggs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 494

You deserved it 3 360

By Eggs - 15/11/2013 05:00 - United States - Port Richey

Today, I fell down in the street when a speeding car chucked a hard-boiled egg at my butt. While I waited for the feeling in my legs to return, they came back and threw more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 095

You deserved it 3 149

By not a shitty situation so fuck you - 24/06/2016 22:52 - United States - San Francisco

Today, in a public toilet, I got to experience a guy high out of his mind kicking in my locked stall door and puking all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 851

You deserved it 773

Volcanic

By poopshooter101 - 30/06/2009 11:53 - United States

Today, I was at Walmart when my stomach began to hurt. I quickly waddled to the restroom in pain. As soon as I got in the stall, a huge crap exploded out of me. The child in the stall next to me started crying. When her mom asked what was wrong, she said that I'd "killed her nose." FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 767

You deserved it 9 343

By Anonymous - 15/06/2011 13:37 - Denmark

Today, I was in my family's hotel room taking a dump. The lock to the bathroom was broken so we had made a deal: when the door is closed, someone is using the toilet. The maid didn't know that. She punched me in the face because she claimed I scared her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 175

You deserved it 3 307

MyMuse7 0

Tuesday 19 April 2011 18:52

I would have pelted them with my shit

amerwin 3

Tuesday 19 April 2011 18:50

I would've scrambled out of their as quickly as possible.

Comments

collegeadministr 0

Tuesday 19 April 2011 23:18

When you have to go, you have to go. honestly, most public restrooms aren't that bad. I have no problem with them :)

TheDamnDrifter 1

Tuesday 19 April 2011 23:20

Hmmmmm gives me ideas

underpaid011 0

Tuesday 19 April 2011 23:20

throw shit back at them!!

DjPDub 0

Tuesday 19 April 2011 23:34

Were you... bowled over... when they kicked the door open? Did you feel... flushed? Have a few... ***** n giggles... about this later.

ugli77 0

Tuesday 19 April 2011 23:42

that's yolks

pdk420 0

Wednesday 20 April 2011 0:16

YDI for ******** in public

JenL_fml 7

Wednesday 20 April 2011 0:54

God, I hate these puns... -.-

lilmisslovely13 15

Thursday 21 April 2011 3:56

i agree. they get old real fast. like after the first person said one

MeatSucks777 0

Wednesday 20 April 2011 0:58

lol I should do that hahaha

Trooth 13

Wednesday 20 April 2011 1:08

lol that does suck but it's pretty funny :p

Krilleee 5

Wednesday 20 April 2011 1:42

kicked the door down?! man that's ******* awesome! yeah bad ass kids

Keywords

Miscellaneous Family DIY Cats Work Poopoo peepee Awkward Management Frustration Am I overreacting? Capitalism Relatable Coworkers Transportation Animals ADHD Dogs Dating Love Mental health Health Anxiety Technology Sleep Noise Roommate Clumsy AITA Confused Parents

The Top

Today, I found out that my boyfriend lost a bunch of money by buying some scam cryto crap linked to that "Hawk tuah" girl. Easiest break-up ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 457

You deserved it 109

Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 507

You deserved it 15 067

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I agree, your life sucks 931

You deserved it 358

Today, my boyfriend is leaving me for his pregnant side chick, all because I “deprived” him of sex after suffering a miscarriage. To top it all off, the smug bastard actually told me, “Don’t worry, you’ll find happiness again someday, what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger.” Seriously dude? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 607

You deserved it 221

Today, my girlfriend of 4 months confessed that she purposely lied and told me she was on the pill when she wasn't so she could get pregnant (she now is). All websites call tampering with birth control reproductive coercion and abuse, but ONLY when a man does it to a woman. When she does it to me, it's a romance book plotline. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 141

You deserved it 184

Today, my girlfriend and I were going to get intimate, so I masturbated before leaving my place, hoping it would help me last longer than usual. 10 minutes in, she shoved me off and started screaming at me, convinced that I've been cheating on her and practising with someone else. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 732

You deserved it 10 557

Today, I invited a guy I've been crushing on for ages to my house, and I really wanted to make a good impression. We were sitting in the living room having drinks when my cat came in, dragging a pair of my dirty underwear and dropped them right in front of us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 592

You deserved it 4 523

Today, I got a 4-hour Saturday detention as a punishment for skipping a regular detention. We had to wear full school uniforms, then sit at our desks in silence and write long boring punishment essays. It was HORRIBLE. I don't think schools should be allowed to detain and punish pupils on a Saturday. Do you agree? FML

I agree, your life sucks 197

You deserved it 2 007

Same thing different taste

Not now, Kelsey

Volcanic

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