Miscellaneous: Today, I was using a public bathroom when a woman backs in, pulls...

By yourmom - 16/06/2009 04:06 - United States

Today, I was using a public bathroom when a woman backs in, pulls down her pants, and sits on my lap. Needless to say she didn't even notice I was there until I hyperventilated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 510

You deserved it 4 748

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Same thing different taste

By Gasman - 15/07/2017 15:30 - New Zealand

Today, I was sitting in the doctor's waiting room and thought that I was alone. I let rip two massive farts before realising there was a very short woman behind the computer screen at the desk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 510

You deserved it 3 149

Surprise!

By Anonymous - 12/10/2022 02:00

Today, at nine months pregnant, I stopped at a truckstop to use the restroom. I opened an unlocked stall door and stood face to face with a woman bent over wiping. She let out a scream so blood-curdlingly loud, that I wet myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 871

You deserved it 125

By s3xygrandpa - 06/11/2013 19:09 - United States - Palm Harbor

Today, despite my fear of using public restrooms, I was forced to anyway to avoid my bladder exploding. I was finally getting over it when someone stuck their head under the stall to "see if someone's in there". I'm scared more now than I was before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 730

You deserved it 5 122

Shy pooper

By privatebathroomneeded - 16/12/2014 19:26 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I needed to take a dump at school. As soon as I sat down, somebody else walked in. I'm extremely poop-shy, so I was forced to wait for several minutes while they styled their hair and applied makeup. After they left, I breathed a sigh of relief. Then someone else walked in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 937

You deserved it 8 085

Help!

By Anonymous - 25/11/2012 06:56 - United States

Today, I was in a public toilet, enduring an extremely awkward silence between myself and the person in the next stall. In my rush to get out of there, I managed to get my ass stuck in the toilet seat, and ended up being pulled out by the maintenance men. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 406

You deserved it 8 095

By Anna - 13/07/2013 04:40 - United States - New York

Today, I was using a public restroom. As I lowered my pants, a man's head and arms popped out over the divider. He took a picture and immediately rushed out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 334

You deserved it 3 222

UTI

By Anonymous - 09/01/2021 07:01 - United States - Fort Worth

Today, while studying in the library, I felt a sudden urge to pass gas. There were not too many people around, so I let it go while in my seat and it went unnoticed. What caught the attention of everybody was the puddle slowly forming under my seat. Turns out, I farted so hard I pissed myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 510

You deserved it 1 069

By Tressa95 - 25/02/2018 18:30 - United States - Belleville

Today, I walked into a public restroom and, to my utter surprise, saw a lady squeezing blood out of used tampons. We made eye contact, she continued, and I ran out in horror. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 681

You deserved it 306

By a manly woman? - 09/02/2009 23:57 - United States

Today, a girl entered the public washroom I was washing my hands in. When she saw me, she stopped dead in her tracks. I then saw her go to the door to make sure she was actually in the girl's washroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 124

You deserved it 4 978

Relaxed

By Sorry, Doc - 10/09/2022 01:30

Today, I was very tense as I sat in the chair for my gyno appointment, so the doctor repeatedly told me to relax, in order for her to do the routine exam. I then overcompensated and relaxed so much, I accidentally farted in her face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 962

You deserved it 223

Avenging_Angel 0

Tuesday 16 June 2009 12:12

There are too many holes in this FML: 1. you left the door wide open in a public restroom?! 2. The lady did not feel the warmness and squishiness of your body when she sat down?? 3. You didn't say "******* get off me, bitch?!?" You are just retarded.

r0ji 0

Tuesday 16 June 2009 12:03

Wow that's pretty extreme.

Comments

SublimeToInsomni 0

Wednesday 17 June 2009 18:11

Everyone who says it doesn't make sense is an idiot. Allow me to illustrate; ______ P>___| W> P is poster and W is woman. Arrow shows what way they're facing. The door's lock is broken. _______ P>W>_ The door (like most toilets) opens inwards, so the woman (who either really needs to goor is too obese to turn around) backs in. ______ PW>_ The woman plants herself down on the poster. Either the sheer shock of the whole event combined with the urgency of the woman's need to go or the woman's crushing weight (which may have winded the poster) combined with her obesity causing her ass to have a weakened sense of touch or have gone completely dead (as any fat person who has sat in a slumped position will tell you is common) caused the woman to not notice the texture of the "seat" and the poster to start hyperventilating. And when the poster does, the woman notices and an FML is born. So suck it.

lara_anne 0

Sunday 26 July 2009 6:02

ha ha thats hilarious, lol gotta love the diagrams

ashattack23 1

Monday 11 April 2011 15:55

XD win

foryoublue94 0

Wednesday 17 June 2009 22:40

lol how would she NOT realize that she was sitting on someone else's lap idc if it's fake, it's funny but sick. XD

dancepants 0

Thursday 18 June 2009 2:16

lmao, who the hell sits on someone else's lap in the washroom and doesn't notice! That actually made my day, and my friends' day

eeknicole 0

Thursday 18 June 2009 7:52

this is so fake. whoever actualy believes this really happen'd to someone is stupid. no one would actualy just sit there while some stranger's naked ass in ontop on them taking a piss/shit and doesn't try to push them off or lay something to them. funny mental image though.

RhymePrime 7

Thursday 18 June 2009 8:41

You invalidated this anecdote when you referred to yourself as "yourmom" in the author section. And apparently you don't have arms because anybody with them would extend them to obstruct her descent onto your lap, Lol.

InspiredByGaGa 8

Thursday 18 June 2009 20:07

I've had people open the door on me before. Sometimes, the lock is broken or you are in a crappy bathroom where the doors don't align properly, and you can't even lock it!

SusanaSaysRawrxD 0

Thursday 18 June 2009 20:52

YDI for your username. That 'your mom' business is the single most annoying thing everr.

Traum_fml 0

Thursday 18 June 2009 23:06

I dont understand why everyone says your fault you didnt lock the door. It seems obvious that the lock HAD to have been broken because NO ONE goes into a public restroom and leave the door unlocked if they have a choice. I mean I have heard of stranger things happening so I wont say its a fake but is a far stretch.