Animals: Today, I was walking by a pond when I saw a small frog. I decided...

By adad - 01/02/2010 14:34 - France

Today, I was walking by a pond when I saw a small frog. I decided to catch it to get a close look. After I picked it up, I realized that it was not a frog. It was dog shit shaped like a frog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 816

You deserved it 38 046

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Same thing different taste

By AD240Z - 16/12/2016 11:39

Today, while walking my dog in the darkness, I bent down to pick up his poop. I screamed like a little girl as his morning turd leapt up my arm, covering my hand and jacket sleeve in soggy poop. My dog had curled one out onto a dozing frog. I skipped breakfast. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 612

You deserved it 646

By Unknown - 30/06/2014 01:05 - United States

Today, I found out that the lump under my carpet that I stomped on to flatten was actually a dead frog that had gotten caught in the wrong place at the wrong time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 917

You deserved it 7 213

Alas, poor Kermit

By traumatizedforlife - 05/08/2013 20:21 - United States

Today, I stepped out of the house for some fresh air. It was still dark out, so imagine my horror when I accidentally stepped on a frog. It squealed for a split second before being crushed beneath my uncovered foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 425

You deserved it 6 804

By BaliTheDog - 24/03/2013 23:01 - France

Today, I was walking my dog when he stopped in the middle of the street and took a dump. I looked around furtively but saw nobody, so I just kept walking. I stepped in it on the way back home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 020

You deserved it 97 596

By Caqtusmonkey - 25/08/2016 15:28 - United States - Arlington

Today, I heard my dog chewing on something. I called her over, held out my hand, and told her to drop it. She dropped it into my hand, and I was proud of her. That was until I realized it was cat poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 790

You deserved it 1 810

Handful

By Mary - 19/10/2009 01:11 - France

Today, I was walking my dogs when I noticed one of them had found something, and was eating it. After my command to "drop it" went unheeded, I took it upon myself to scoop it out of her mouth with my finger. After getting it all over my hand, I realized it was a piece of another dog's poop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 830

You deserved it 6 934

Rained on

By smellyhand - 16/12/2009 21:11 - United States

Today, it looked like rain so I held out my hand to catch a raindrop. When I finally caught one, I closed my hand over it and ran to show my friends to prove it was raining. I opened my hand saying, "Look! It's raining!" When I looked down, I saw that I had actually caught a bird shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 792

You deserved it 34 072

By oops... - 19/06/2009 04:23 - United States

Today, as a frog biologist I was out in the field searching for a relatively rare frog species. After three hours I finally heard the frog call and I crept closer and closer to the sound until... squish... I stepped on the very frog I was trying to collect. They're endangered. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 347

You deserved it 20 061

By lbg2msf - 06/11/2013 18:08 - United States - Biloxi

Today, I walked under a tree and heard birds chirping from above. I stopped and looked up, only to catch a face full of bird shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 848

You deserved it 9 501

By justin Bieber - 15/06/2015 14:49 - United States - Westland

Today, I was on a boat and I thought I saw a towel fly off, but it was actually my fricken dog. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 195

You deserved it 5 503

alexisthename 0

Monday 1 February 2010 23:15

Reshape it to look like Jesus and leave for someone else to find.

DogmaT_fml 4

Monday 1 February 2010 23:24

good thing you didnt try to kiss it.

Comments

wordgirl 0

Tuesday 2 February 2010 4:51

Did it taste like chicken?

krislea10 0

Tuesday 2 February 2010 5:18

1. how is dog poo confused with a frog? 2. why were you trying to catch a radom frog? and 3. how does dog poo move by itself? YTDI.

sundog 0

Tuesday 2 February 2010 6:04

What a moron... you are as dumb as a bag of hammers.

fairies633 8

Tuesday 2 February 2010 6:11

why would u be picking up a frog anyway?

Iimanii09 0

Tuesday 2 February 2010 6:22

haha green dog poop?? lol ewwwwww

gozar_fml 1

Tuesday 2 February 2010 7:06

ribbit

avizzlery 0

Tuesday 2 February 2010 8:06

buy some glasses.

grog_fml 3

Tuesday 2 February 2010 10:12

was it really hard to catch?

helo2 0

Tuesday 2 February 2010 11:33

bwahahaha. I laughed so hard

Zigma_fml 0

Tuesday 2 February 2010 16:23

"Today, I was just hopping around when a random person picks me up and mistakes me for dog shit. FML."

Keywords

Family Miscellaneous DIY Cats Poopoo peepee Work Awkward Management Am I overreacting? Capitalism Relatable Coworkers Frustration Transportation Dogs Animals ADHD Dating Love Mental health Health Anxiety Technology Sleep Noise Roommate Clumsy AITA Confused Parents

The Top

Today, I got home from visiting my long-distance girlfriend. I spent $366 to get a plane ticket to visit her for the week. The day after I arrived there, she broke up with me and I had to buy a ticket for an earlier flight home. With fees and penalties, I paid around $550 to be broken up with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 66 711

You deserved it 5 223

Today, my wife waited until we’d been married for two weeks to tell me she has a mountain of credit card debt that she’s been hiding from me. This explains why she insisted the mortgage and car be in my name, her credit score is so low that it’s almost a double digit FML

I agree, your life sucks 485

You deserved it 131

The Top

Today, I returned home from a two-year trip overseas. My mom's first words as she greeted me at the arrivals terminal of the airport were, "Your father and I are getting a divorce." FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 702

You deserved it 2 921

Today, my baby brother learned to remove his nappy. He immediately used this new skill to shit all over my room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 825

You deserved it 414

Today, I overheard my mom telling my aunt what an “attention-seeking drama queen” I’ve been lately. All I asked was that she not smoke around me. I’ve had asthma all my life and am currently recovering from Covid. She thinks it’s all a conspiracy, meanwhile I haven’t taken a deep breath in weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 399

You deserved it 115

Today, I went to pick up my daughter from school. The secretary said that my husband had already picked her up two hours ago. I don't have a husband. He left while I was pregnant with her 6 years ago. The secretary said “no one told her” she had to check ID’s before releasing a child for early dismissal. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 259

You deserved it 115

Today, an hour into a family road trip, my mother informed me that she didn't put my suitcase in the car because it "didn't fit". FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 865

You deserved it 2 078

Today, the girl I'm secretly in love with, whom I was talking to on MSN, told me she'd "brb in 10, no wait 20, oh make that 30 min" depending on her boyfriend's stamina. FML

I agree, your life sucks 70 851

You deserved it 9 790

Same thing different taste

Alas, poor Kermit

Handful

Rained on

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