Love: Today, I went for a run. When I got home, no one was there so...

By johnboy - 09/11/2010 17:08 - United States

Today, I went for a run. When I got home, no one was there so I took off my clothes and laid on the cool wood floor. I decided to call my girlfriend and we started talking in baby voices. That's when my mom walked into the house witnessing everything. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 835

You deserved it 37 147

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Same thing different taste

By Jonnygiant - 14/03/2009 01:45 - United States

Today, I was taking a shower after basketball practice. When I got out of the shower I thought no one was home so I thought it might be fun to walk around the house completely naked. I walk downstairs and my mom was eating dinner. Along with 20 other members of her bookclub. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 268

You deserved it 70 109

By bob - 05/02/2011 12:02 - United States

Today, I saw my mom run across the house naked for a condom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 151

You deserved it 4 219

Cool off

By chumleevil - 08/07/2011 04:20 - United States

Today, after running a couple of miles, I went upstairs into my air-conditioned room to cool off. Apparently, my mom walked past my room and heard me breathing heavily. Later, she had my dad give me a talk about masturbation. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 263

You deserved it 3 504

By IceMage - 18/01/2010 00:57 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I decided to sneak into the shower at her house while her parents went out to eat and a movie. Half way through our shower we heard a knocking at the door, it was her mom. We had left all of our clothes downstairs. Safe to say I won't be allowed there any more. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 645

You deserved it 39 425

By Lolrus - 28/03/2009 16:50 - Qatar

Today, I was jogging through my neighborhood and then I notice this cute guy running beside me, we stoped and flirted for a while and my mom drove past. She then rolled down the window and said "Honey, you owe me for the dry cleaning on your period pants." FML

I agree, your life sucks 103 191

You deserved it 5 766

By ohfantastic - 25/01/2009 02:47 - United States

Today, I was sleeping with my boyfriend and woke up in his arms to hear him say "Mom, Mom." FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 696

You deserved it 2 385

By adam - 03/02/2010 20:10 - France

Today, my mom woke me up and asked if I wanted breakfast. I had passed out naked on the kitchen floor after a party. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 085

You deserved it 40 680

Lesson learned

By katharine - 15/03/2010 20:12 - United States

Today, I was daydreaming in bed when my phone rang from across the room. I scrambled out of my covers, tripped over a pair of boots I had by the bed, and slipped on some jeans laying on the floor. Luckily, I answered my phone in time, but only to have my mom tell me to clean my room before she got home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 065

You deserved it 30 683

By MereLewis95 - 26/10/2011 08:58 - United Kingdom

Today, my mother called me urgently from the kitchen. Thinking she was hurt, I ran to her as fast as possible. She threw a wet cloth at my head and ran away, laughing her face off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 457

You deserved it 4 533

Just a question

By Anonymous - 14/12/2019 14:00

Today while I was about to go into the shower, my mom walked in on me while I was naked. She looked down and asked me if I was cold. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 074

You deserved it 258

DocBastard 38

Tuesday 9 November 2010 22:28

Girlfriend: So what are you doing? OP: Just finished a run. I'm all hot and sweaty. Girlfriend: Ooh that's so hot. What are you wearing? OP: Nothing. I'm totally naked. Girlfriend: Ooooh! Sexy! Are you touching yourself? OP: Yeah, I am. MOM?! Girlfriend: Yeah! Call me mommy! You bad boy! OP. MOM!!! Girlfriend: OOOOOOOOOH!!

torrance1221 4

Tuesday 9 November 2010 22:08

hahahahaha that's a hilarious image

Comments

pitineo_fml 0

Tuesday 9 November 2010 23:43

mintcar : you should rotate your pic , it's upside down. and probably pût your face instead of your ass.

mintcar 9

Wednesday 10 November 2010 0:23

Wow, really? That was your best shot? You're incredibly disappointing. By the way the accent circumflex on the word " put" is unnecessary.

Selena_is_back 7

Tuesday 9 November 2010 23:48

But it's fun... :( the cold of wooden floors feels nice. Not that I would know... >_>

ashtin85 0

Tuesday 9 November 2010 23:48

hahah wow. people these days.

ydi_4_suking 20

Tuesday 9 November 2010 23:58

Haha he probably messing with his junk like how babies sit there and poke at it

rawrgirl13 0

Wednesday 10 November 2010 1:41

were u like fully nude? cuz if u were, WTF dude.

ThePaperDragon 31

Wednesday 10 November 2010 1:56

First off, I would like to ask the OP why he would decide to lie naked in a common room of the house, regardless of the fact that he was home alone, I mean, really? Second, I must point out, as previous comments have, your whole "no on" error, I think you should proofread your post before submitting them in the hopes of acceptance, shame on whoever accepted this into F.M.L. In closing, "baby talk"? I would punch a guy square in the face if he used "baby talk" during a conversation with me, especially during sex, I like being submissive and being manhandled a bit by a big strong man, but, that's just me.

MzKitty83 0

Wednesday 10 November 2010 4:00

I'm sorry but really? really? u are a walking oxymoron, I LOVE Jesus, wanna ****? I truly get the vibe that religion is important to u oh an ur nipple is showing

ricethief 0

Wednesday 10 November 2010 5:05

hey ur cute I love rap and go to church and love making origami of flower lilies I could make u sunshine

ricethief 0

Wednesday 10 November 2010 5:09

hey love Jesus can u give me ur email to hook up sexy women love ur necklace

ricethief 0

Wednesday 10 November 2010 5:14

On the wings of an eagle, My love for you flies. Soaring higher and higher, And touching the skies. I reached up above, And pulled a star from the sky. To place it within, Your precious minds eye. To dwell there forever, As my love for you. On the wings of our love, Enduring and true. I honor you my darling, With all that I am. Please darling please, Will you be my man? There are so many things, My heart wants to say. I love you sweetheart, There is no other way. your love ricethief

ThePaperDragon 31

Wednesday 10 November 2010 5:55

No no, If you would read a bit closer, you would know that I wrote that I TRY to follow my religion, however, I have strayed and do regret it, and I have "done the deed" twice, once, well, I do not like to talk about the first experience, and I felt a burning need to do it again to rid myself of the first experience.. And although I have been told that I will be forgive for the first time, it happened and seeing as it took my virginity, I can't help but count it...

FFML_314 11

Wednesday 10 November 2010 6:07

Hypocrite, 64. You should proofread your comments before posting them. Also, it's obvious that the staff of *FML felt the story was worthy of publishing. Cheers!

ThePaperDragon 31

Wednesday 10 November 2010 6:33

The staff of *F.M.L. will only read through those entries if they pass through the moderation process. Therefore, each potential post must be voted through first; and pardon my error, forgiven*. I admit what I did was wrong, and it was after I rid myself of that foul feeling from my first encounter that I realized that my method of restoring order was wrong, and that was when I began focusing on my religion, but in my original post, I was going more along the lines of "This is what I hope to get out of a marriage, through the church, in the future". Pardon me for being unclear.