By creepermagnet - 06/04/2009 19:39 - United States

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML
I agree, your life sucks 399 832
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creepermagnet tells us more.

creepermagnet 0

Let me tell you the rest of the story: this actually happened a couple months ago, but I just discovered this site. First off, there was NO second date. My God. Right after he said that, I told him I wanted to go home (he had driven, and I didn't have a car or any way to get home). He then asked if I wanted to go to the woods so he could "do things to me." I told him no, going home would be fine. He took me home and I called him and told him I never wanted to see him again. For half an hour, he tried to convince me to see him again, but I eventually just hung up. For a month or so he called me every day but I didn't answer. Finally, I grew tired of this and I answered the phone. I told him he was really scaring me and he needed to stop trying to contact me. He told me, "I was falling in love with you but they all laughed at me!" (Mind you, I do not know who "they" are. Nor do I wish to know). I told him I was very sorry, but he had to stop calling me or I would contact the police. He then said to me, "Where is the darkness??? Why do you paint me as a demon when I just want to show you the light???" I haven't spoken to him since.

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Comments

Ender_ 0

I'm just imagining that he's not saying it to you, but more to himself in a self-satisfied sort of way. hahahahaha.

THAT.IS.AWESOME i cant wait to use that

Kaaaaatie 0

well, it could have been worse. he could have put his hand lower down and said "soon, your love canal will be filled with my manhood." always look on the bright side!

tkiero 0

ahahahahahhahaha oh my godddd

marykateex3 0

AHAHAHA. That just made my day. It's unbelievably creepy (how do you respond to that?!), but it's also HILARIOUS. But honestly, run as fast as you can. Maybe buy some new locks and sleep with pepper spray and a rape whistle for now on... ::continues laughing::

youre_fucked 0

so is his seed in there yet?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHA THIS IS MY OTHER FAVORITE FML. ahahahaah LOVE THAT BOY. as long as he just has a cool sense of humor and was joking..