By creepermagnet - 06/04/2009 19:39 - United States

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML
I agree, your life sucks 399 832
You deserved it 46 094

creepermagnet tells us more.

creepermagnet 0

Let me tell you the rest of the story: this actually happened a couple months ago, but I just discovered this site. First off, there was NO second date. My God. Right after he said that, I told him I wanted to go home (he had driven, and I didn't have a car or any way to get home). He then asked if I wanted to go to the woods so he could "do things to me." I told him no, going home would be fine. He took me home and I called him and told him I never wanted to see him again. For half an hour, he tried to convince me to see him again, but I eventually just hung up. For a month or so he called me every day but I didn't answer. Finally, I grew tired of this and I answered the phone. I told him he was really scaring me and he needed to stop trying to contact me. He told me, "I was falling in love with you but they all laughed at me!" (Mind you, I do not know who "they" are. Nor do I wish to know). I told him I was very sorry, but he had to stop calling me or I would contact the police. He then said to me, "Where is the darkness??? Why do you paint me as a demon when I just want to show you the light???" I haven't spoken to him since.

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Comments

creepermagnet 0

#82 was what I did after that.

hahahahhahahahahahahahahhahahaahah omggg that had me rolling. damn thats hilarious. wooo thanks for that. one of the best FML's in my opinion. im sure he was joking but if not i would get the hell out.

HAHHAHAHHAHAHA omg, too good, too good.

#92 awesome that was really funny til i read the rest of your story... now it's just disturbing. that's a shame because if it were a joke he'd be my dream man :op

lmFUCKINGao!! #3 I was just about to say that lmfao! haha im not guna forget this one. RUN.

ellebell 0

hold on...*takes drink- - -spits it out* WTF?!?!?!

Oh, I just saw the OP's response above… I'm sorry, that's creepy but hysterical!

bridgetheartsyou 0

that is sooo creepy. i sugest never going on a date with him again

tiltwrestler 0

LMAO! It's guys like this that makes it that much easier for guys like me to get laid! I love it. Hahahahaha

iPikachu 0

That's my status on fb right now. haahahaaahaa Jw what did u do after that?