By creepermagnet - 06/04/2009 19:39 - United States

Today, I went on a date with a guy for the first time. We went to Starbucks and got coffee. We talked for a while, and we were joking and having a good time. Suddenly, he put his hand on my stomach and said, "Soon, this will be plump with my seed." FML
I agree, your life sucks 399 834
You deserved it 46 094

creepermagnet tells us more.

creepermagnet 0

Let me tell you the rest of the story: this actually happened a couple months ago, but I just discovered this site. First off, there was NO second date. My God. Right after he said that, I told him I wanted to go home (he had driven, and I didn't have a car or any way to get home). He then asked if I wanted to go to the woods so he could "do things to me." I told him no, going home would be fine. He took me home and I called him and told him I never wanted to see him again. For half an hour, he tried to convince me to see him again, but I eventually just hung up. For a month or so he called me every day but I didn't answer. Finally, I grew tired of this and I answered the phone. I told him he was really scaring me and he needed to stop trying to contact me. He told me, "I was falling in love with you but they all laughed at me!" (Mind you, I do not know who "they" are. Nor do I wish to know). I told him I was very sorry, but he had to stop calling me or I would contact the police. He then said to me, "Where is the darkness??? Why do you paint me as a demon when I just want to show you the light???" I haven't spoken to him since.

Top comments

Comments

HAHA!!! Well, I laugh, but if I were you I'd totally freak out... Creepy...

Do you normally attract creepers? hahahahhahhaha best pickup line EVERR

Oh, i would run for my life. i don't know about you but i think that's just horribly weird.

RUN, do not walk, to the nearest exit.

fitz_dizzyspells 0

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAAHAHHAHAHAHHAA.

HAHAHAHA. Freaking hilarious, the best FML I've read in a week. Hopefully he was joking.

lauren416 0

That's the best thing I've heard in a while.

WOW. Joking gone too far? Better safe than sorry, ditch him! That's one of THOSE stories, you know; your skin crawls, but you're crying from laughing so hard...