Generally I feel like it's my job to pay the bill so I love when my girlfriend pays for shit. The other night I bought dinner and she bought dessert at a frozen yogurt place. It was great

I kinda see where the guy is coming from I think doing it on the sly like that was not the best move butttt he defs overreacted to the situation and I get the feeling he would have been a very controlling person so it's probs a good thing the relationship ended. Next time though if you're gonna pay just ask first or say no I got this don't wait till the guy is in the toilet then do it. That way the guy be like are you sure? and then be very happy that he has such a generous GF or he gets to bat you off saying no I took you out I'm paying and then he gets to feel generous either works out best for both of you really in that situation :).

If that's enough to make him lose his manly pride, then he's obviously very insecure. A real man would have just said 'Okay, but I'll buy some dessert on the way home" or something. Did he at least write you a cheque for the dinner before he dumped you?

Having one friend who also acted this way doesn't make it any less old fashioned and, really, a bit outdated. Even if a hundred people did it, it's still the minority and, although I get it's supposed to be a nice thing, a bit morally questionable.

Actually, even though it was a nice gesture, you did do it in a shitty, sneaky way. If a woman wants to pay, I must have a chance to offer and then let her insist. I'm a modern guy who is secure in his manhood, so I don't put up much of a fight (plus, I'm a cheapskate ;) ) However, this formality is important and you kind of cheated this guy out of the little dance. It's probably an overreaction, but you really did commit a faux pas with the stealth payment.

Good you're rid of that weirdo, bro's got issues if he can't accept a woman paying for his food.

That sucks op, but your better off without him if he is going to act like that. When my husband and I first dated I had a better paying job so I would tend to pay for things more, and he loved that I could hold my own. Your ex should have excepted the gesture with a smile and then took you home and rubbed your feet.

Wow, talk about being an immature sissy. I feel for you OP. My fiance and I really don't have a problem with inviting the other. Sometimes he pays, sometimes I pay. It's 50/50. To be honest, I earn much more than he does since he runs his own business and has been lately severely impacted by the recession. I pay most of the rent and we share the bills. He is man enough to be ok with it since we see our relationship as a partnership. If I was the one struggling, he would be supporting me. Don’t worry and most of all DON’T apologize. He should be the ones crawling at your feet. I still wonder in fairness if he didn't use this as an excuse and had the intention of breaking up with you for a while because splitting up over something so stupid seems really extreme. :-/

What an idiot

My boyfriend prefers to pay for things but he's glad that I like to pay too. In his mind it shows that I'm not using him as a bankroll which has happened to him in the past. It honestly drives me nuts that he tries to pay so often but I know it makes him happy so we try to compromise on who's paying when. Sucks that that happened to you OP, but you're better off.