Health: Today, in the gym, as I bent over to pick up my weights an old...

By Anonymous - 27/10/2009 10:28 - United Kingdom

Today, in the gym, as I bent over to pick up my weights an old man farted right in my face. The stench was appalling. To make matters worse, a girl I've fancied for ages thought it was me and reported it to the instructor. I was told to leave for 'anti-social behavior'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 618

You deserved it 2 939

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Same thing different taste

Get out

By pipefitter28 - 27/12/2012 06:46 - Canada - Vernon

Today, I tried to impress a girl at the gym on the squat rack, but let out a big fart. She was grossed out and laughed at me with her friends. Her boyfriend came over and told me I was a dead man, and I'd better leave. I'm now the proud owner of a year membership at a gym I can't go to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 129

You deserved it 28 900

By Mark - 30/03/2009 07:06 - United States

Today, I was working out at the gym doing squats. There was a girl there that I wanted to impress so I loaded up the bar with a lot of weight and began to do my squat. As I was going down I farted so loud that I began to laugh and fell backwards. Everyone in the room just stared at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 450

You deserved it 74 955

By yogapants - 24/09/2010 20:21 - Switzerland

Today, I let out the most horrific, loudest, and most vile smelling fart I have ever had in my life while in the middle of yoga class. Out of embarrassment, I tried to lessen the tension in the silent room by giggling, but no one saw the funny side. I was given looks of horror, and avoided by everyone else for the rest of the class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 250

You deserved it 14 868

Core

By Anonymous - 18/03/2023 16:00

Today, I went to the gym and accidentally farted during yoga class. Everyone looked at me and the instructor said, "Let's all take a moment to appreciate the power of core strength." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 110

You deserved it 163

Stealth

By smellyhair - 02/11/2014 11:28 - United Kingdom

Today, I was shopping for a new deodorant, and this guy was standing in the way. He wouldn't move, so I crouched down to get the one I wanted, right when he did the most violent fart right in my face. Then his wife came over, made a face and he whispered, "I think that girl just farted". FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 141

You deserved it 3 867

Foul

By cdubb27 - 11/10/2010 06:00 - United States

Today, while at the gym, I noticed a foul smell while on elliptical machine. I figured it was the little old lady on the machine next to me. It was so bad I had to leave. When I got in my truck, I realized the smell had followed me. It was me. My cat had pissed on my workout clothes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 120

You deserved it 9 043

By belle_arina - 08/10/2009 05:05 - United States

Today, we were doing stretches in dance class where you are on your hands and doing the splits in the air while your partner helps hold you and stretch your legs further. Right as I lift my left leg up, I farted hugely right in my partner's face. I couldn't make eye contact for the rest of class. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 423

You deserved it 8 519

By tantanpanda - 24/06/2015 12:44 - United States

Today, I was swimming my routine laps at the gym's pool and a man came in and swam in the adjacent lane. While swimming freestyle, I smelled a really nasty fart. Not a minute later, he hurriedly left. I didn't realize what he had done until I saw "floating particles" in the water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 492

You deserved it 1 941

Stealth bomber

By Jogger - 19/08/2020 14:01

Today, I was standing in line at a coffee shop when the guy stood behind me let out a huge fart, then walked away. The rest of the line turned around, thinking that it was me. An old lady started to lecture me about being rude, while the guy who did it laughed behind his mask in the corner of the shop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 570

You deserved it 136

Check her out

By minnie - 28/08/2009 18:30 - United States

Today, I was feeling sick and I farted really loud in the school's girls bathroom. Some boys overheard from the hall and called everyone over. I came out only to find about 20 guys staring anxiously at the bathroom's door to see who I was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 803

You deserved it 6 905

2step 1

Tuesday 27 October 2009 16:04

WTF? Reported and kicked out for farting? Is it some nazi gym?

FreddyLunch 0

Tuesday 27 October 2009 15:58

"Fancied" is such a British thing to say, I'm glad that you are keeping it British and didn't say you had a crush on her.

Comments

phatdaddy 0

Tuesday 27 October 2009 19:21

Next time you see see her there. fling poo at the bitch. Then stab her.

bored690 0

Sunday 8 November 2009 15:34

now THAT is anti-social behaviour.... banned for life

Witchcraft_fml 4

Tuesday 27 October 2009 19:52

Did dust explode out of the old man's ass when he farted?

Superawesomestev 0

Tuesday 27 October 2009 21:08

ydi for not sticking up for yourself. also, where are you exercising that there is an old guy, you and an instructor?

averagexbecca 0

Tuesday 27 October 2009 21:12

Not all women have it out for guys who like them. Probably the girl didn't know about his crush and just said to the instructor, "HOLY SHIT! HE JUST FARTED - IT ******* STINKS." And since OP and the old man are right next to each other, and the OP was bending over to pick up weights when it happened, it probably looked like he did it. So the instructor asked him to kindly leave for his 'anti-social behavior' xDD And as for the second part and third part, I agree. OP should've explained himself, at least for his own image. Who wants to be seen as the guy who got kicked out for farting? OP shouldn't have gone down without a fight. And, the OP bent over sticking his face in the man's ass without waiting for him to move? Lol, that is anti-social. That, or mid-bend the man suddenly moves over and sticks his ass there...o.O

AidenGarrett 0

Tuesday 27 October 2009 21:21

my question is...why was there an old guy in a school gym...most schools don't just let random weirdos on campus

iSmellNice 2

Tuesday 27 October 2009 21:44

It's not a school gym, it's a public gym. They do have those.

itouchguy360 3

Tuesday 27 October 2009 22:13

sucks 4 you.

wyocowboysfan 0

Tuesday 27 October 2009 22:47

fancied? this is america! we speak american!

ugh_a_lug 7

Tuesday 27 October 2009 23:08

He's from Britain. They say stuff like 'fancied.'

wtfismyfml 0

Tuesday 27 October 2009 23:13

not all of us brits say that sort of stuff depends where bouts you from

Person1233 12

Tuesday 27 October 2009 23:40

#45 is 11 years old, don't mind him.

hornetchik 0

Wednesday 28 October 2009 2:01

What the ****, YOU may be from America, but some people here aren't! I'm not British, im from New Zealand, and I speak the same language as you, but its not American, its ENGLISH!

Mr_Tumnis 0

Wednesday 28 October 2009 6:23

Some people can't spot a troll...

hornetchik 0

Wednesday 28 October 2009 6:32

Im not up with the internet terms sorry, I don't go on that much.

Mr_Tumnis 0

Wednesday 28 October 2009 6:46

;)

NATTiCUS 0

Thursday 29 October 2009 2:01

FFS! Learn that other countries use different words to u. Get over it! The FML still makes sence, read it and move on with out being a bitch.

bored690 0

Sunday 8 November 2009 15:36

the internet isn't strictly american you douche

BaconChubs 0

Tuesday 27 October 2009 23:36

I don't understand how farting is "anti-social behavior". Everyone does it.

Christina21 2

Tuesday 27 October 2009 23:43

SHE TOLD ON YOU..ARE U SERIOUS ???

aliceeeeeeeeeee 0

Wednesday 28 October 2009 0:09

britain does not 'suck'. it does have it down point though. like you cant buy tippex under 18. but oh well. + is this gym like tiny? at david lloyd the weights were well away from any old men. change your gym.