Miscellaneous: Today, it's "family fun night." We're pulling weeds. FML - FML

By Suzie Leone - 24/01/2012 03:21 - United States

Today, it's "family fun night." We're pulling weeds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 487

You deserved it 2 708

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Same thing different taste

Let it all hang out

By Anonymous - 20/06/2021 14:01 - Germany

Today, my mom was pulling up weeds on the terrace while wearing gardening gloves. Why is that worth mentioning? Because that's literally all she was wearing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 141

You deserved it 105

Timewaster

By Anonymous - 04/11/2022 11:00 - Australia - Perth

Today, I spent the afternoon transplanting a whole bunch of corn seedlings that sprouted, even turning over the new soil with compost and fertiliser. While watering them in, I realised they're actually all just weeds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 392

You deserved it 642

By Anonymous - 21/05/2014 16:05 - United States - New York

Today, I woke to my drunk mother trying to vacuum the lawn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 864

You deserved it 4 377

Boom!

By JurassicHole - 22/04/2012 03:27 - United States

Today, while landscaping my backyard, I was pulling a big weed out of the ground. After the last tug, the soil came free, but ended up with me punching myself full force in the nuts. I think my future children are already filing for parental abuse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 208

You deserved it 4 470

By Anonymous - 02/04/2012 02:25 - United States - Binghamton

Today, while mowing the lawn, I ran over a hornet's nest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 950

You deserved it 3 440

Quality family time

By Anonymous - 28/03/2024 18:00 - United States

Today, after a long talk with the kids, I finally got all the chores around the house done early so we could have a fun family weekend. My wife decided to be a wet blanket and insisted we needed to deep clean the already clean kitchen. Three arguments later, everyone is sulking, and I'm working in the kitchen alone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 592

You deserved it 127

Family is everything

By Anonymous - 26/08/2021 17:01 - United States - Stoughton

Today, I thought I would take my family to the beach for the day. My wife is sitting on the front porch, not talking to me, because after working a 60-hour week, I would rather enjoy my family and the fruits of my labor, rather than help her clean the house that she has spent all week at, doing nothing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 055

You deserved it 215

By What. - 14/08/2013 00:08 - United States - Pawtucket

Today, my father bought a riding lawn mower. We don't have a lawn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 071

You deserved it 3 569

By anon - 20/07/2011 07:55 - Canada

Today, my neighbor finally cut the grass on his front lawn. At 2 in the morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 972

You deserved it 3 346

Green fingers

By Claire - 11/02/2024 15:00 - United Kingdom - Edinburgh

Today, it's been a few weeks since I took up gardening to relax, caring for my plants, and they finally started blooming. Excitedly, I posted a picture online, only to have a friend tell me that my "beautiful flowers" are actually weeds. Apparently, I have a talent for cultivating the unwanted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 416

You deserved it 128

Next

Top comments

zoPwNAgEzo 21

Tuesday 24 January 2012 8:35

What kind of weed?

cBlackout 13

Tuesday 24 January 2012 8:39

Then later you can all paint the garage, oh it'll be so much fun.

Comments

McDonaldsworker 4

Tuesday 24 January 2012 11:25

Hell yeah that's what I call a family fun night! (so why is this an FML?)

AcidLacedBong 5

Tuesday 24 January 2012 11:52

Consider yourself lucky I'd rather pull weeds than play board games or go out anywhere with my family .... Either way family fun night usually is lame sorry OP

Pelreskovich 11

Tuesday 24 January 2012 12:59

Sounds like a blast! Then y'all fire up the hookah in the living room later on?

ronski 41

Tuesday 24 January 2012 13:09

At least you're not smoking it

thelaxersvlog 9

Tuesday 24 January 2012 13:13

Sounds like a good ol' time

linkinpark98 23

Tuesday 24 January 2012 14:17

Splendid, indeed!

thiscrazything 1

Tuesday 24 January 2012 13:14

We used to have rock and stick parties, all family members were invited to a large pasture and given a wheel barrow and work gloves. What fun we had removing every stick and rock.

jazzy131 0

Tuesday 24 January 2012 13:26

Hey bro, it's either pulling them or smoking them.

mieks 18

Tuesday 24 January 2012 15:03

or pulling them, then smoking them

honeybadger123 0

Tuesday 24 January 2012 16:26

is it the smokeable weed? ;)

chosha_fml 26

Tuesday 24 January 2012 20:15

Sounds like Mormons. :)

KiddNYC1O 20

Tuesday 24 January 2012 21:04

It'll be worth it.

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The Top

Today, I learned the meaning behind the phrase, "Love you long time". It's from the movie Full Metal Jacket, when a hooker comes in and says, "Me so horny, me love you long time." I've been saying this to my parents and people at school, having no idea what it really means for over 2 weeks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 784

You deserved it 22 714

Today, my mother and wife are arguing over raising our baby Catholic or Church of England. They’re mad at each other and as a bonus they’re both mad at me because I’m non-religious and genuinely don’t care which made-up religion they try to raise her in, I’m just enjoying being a dad over here. FML

I agree, your life sucks 437

You deserved it 155

The Top

Today, my dad let me use his phone. Five minutes later, he had my mom call it because he thought he'd lost it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 702

You deserved it 123

Today, my boss told me to not burn the place down while she was outside. When she came back inside, I accidentally started a fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 192

You deserved it 477

Today, when my baby girl was born, my husband insisted we name her “Michelle” Michelle is the name of his coworker, who he potentially has a crush on. He insists that Michelle is strictly professional and he’d divorce me if I didn’t follow through with the name. Michelle is our new daughter’s name. FML

I agree, your life sucks 437

You deserved it 666

Today, my girl called me a "brainless, insensitive prick" Why? Because I wanted to surprise her with flowers since she’s been on vacation for 3 weeks and I hadn’t seen her. She was badly sunburned. I’d bought sunflowers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 220

You deserved it 118

Today, my boyfriend found out that male goats will stick their tongues out, snort, and garble at female goats in heat. Now he's doing it to me at all manner of times, sound effects and all. I now know why goats ram their heads into things repeatedly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 180

You deserved it 2 310

Today, my mother told me that I "should have never had children" after I sided with my son when he yelled at her for talking too loudly. I have hyperacusis, and my son has sensory deprivation disorder. My mom knows this, and blames it on her friends who are hard of hearing. Nothing is ever her fault. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 027

You deserved it 160