Kids: Today, my 10-year-old brother got the bright idea to urinate... - FML

By Anonymous - 27/12/2011 15:53 - United States

Today, my 10-year-old brother got the bright idea to urinate in my oven to cool it off. My whole house smells like burnt piss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 499

You deserved it 3 233

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

By neednewfriends - 19/12/2009 23:21 - United States

Today, I ran into the living room when I heard the smoke alarm going off. Turns out, my friend thought it was a good idea to melt a plastic cup on my floor heater. He also thought the best way to put it out was to urinate on it. My house smells like burnt pee. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 368

You deserved it 2 948

By Amber - 10/01/2010 17:17 - United States

Today, I found out why my bathroom has been smelling so bad. My 10-year-old son has been peeing on the radiator, thinking it's fun to watch it steam and sizzle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 157

You deserved it 3 276

I want to smell feet

By Anonymous - 16/08/2021 14:01

Today, my idiot son incinerated his shoes in the oven. They were wet and he wanted to "quick-dry" them, so now the whole house smells terrible. FML

I agree, your life sucks 897

You deserved it 159

The sweet smell of…

By Anonymous - 04/03/2017 14:00

Today, my not-quite-potty-trained toddler niece had a 'wee accident' in my bed. I used towels to mop it up and changed the sheets. Later, I had the bright idea to dry it faster by turning the electric blanket on high. Now my room smells like burned urine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 947

You deserved it 6 559

By richkief76 - 10/05/2011 02:34

Today, I finally found where the awful lingering stench in my house was coming from. My son thought it would be funny to piss in the baby's humidifier. He's 16. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 982

You deserved it 8 335

By girl on fire - 03/09/2015 00:32

Today, my idiot kid brother set my shirt on fire with a magnifying glass while I was taking a nap outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 419

You deserved it 2 723

By Anonymous - 08/03/2014 01:16 - United States - Newton Center

Today, my 5-year-old son thought it'd be a good idea to pee into the heat vent in the hallway of our apartment building. The whole building now smells like urine. The landlord is a 6-foot ex-convict. He wants answers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 561

You deserved it 6 905

Unpleasant

By Anonymous - 13/05/2023 14:00 - United Kingdom - Barnsley

Today, my brother tried to sit on my head and fart, except he followed through. It didn’t make it past his trousers but for a few brief seconds before he ran to the bathroom I could smell it and feel how warm it was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 865

You deserved it 103

By NikkiiFireStarter - 20/10/2009 10:46 - United Kingdom

Today, I found out my 10 year old step-brother has an obsession with fire, after he burnt all the belongings in my room, including an £600 guitar. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 105

You deserved it 2 933

By Anonymous - 11/01/2015 08:44

Today, my brother woke me up by trying to light my bed on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 945

You deserved it 2 841

Next

Top comments

Epsilonyx 15

Tuesday 27 December 2011 18:55

I'd be pissed.

PaulB123 11

Tuesday 27 December 2011 18:56

If he ever complains he's hot, pee on him. He'll get it.

Comments

JonnyAnonymous 0

Tuesday 27 December 2011 22:03

When you gotta go, you gotta go hahahahaha

old09 11

Tuesday 27 December 2011 22:06

Stuck his head in/on the oven That'll teach him

aFreedom127 9

Tuesday 27 December 2011 22:13

Did the oven cool down?

mlw63 0

Tuesday 27 December 2011 22:18

Laughing my ass off! That's classic.

ZDK5498 6

Tuesday 27 December 2011 22:35

what a dumb ass... punish that little stupid ****** so he has common sense thats ******* ridiculous... unless if he has mental issues... best of luck to you OP...

sodapopper 6

Tuesday 27 December 2011 22:41

Beat him unmerciful! That way you'll BOTH remember this experience forever.

KiddNYC1O 20

Tuesday 27 December 2011 22:51

A brewery right in your house, nice. Time to cash in.

hateevryone 14

Tuesday 27 December 2011 23:03

where the hell did he get that from?

LadyCarter89 6

Tuesday 27 December 2011 23:18

Perhaps try supervising children next time you welcome them into you house?

docscientist 9

Wednesday 28 December 2011 0:35

I know because you can watch EVERY move they make at ALL TIMES. And he's ******* 10, he should know better.

LadyCarter89 6

Wednesday 28 December 2011 0:48

Well he clearly isn't a mature ten year old and needs supervision.. I get that kids can't be watched every second - but how the **** was he allowed near a hot oven long enough to piss in it?!

ShadesOfBlue5 9

Tuesday 27 December 2011 23:27

Febreze moment

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Today, the woman I love, who rejected me countless times, got a boyfriend. Bitter about it, I post on my Instagram Story: “I could have been your love bug, but apparently you’re into roaches.” She posted a story of them kissing, saying, “I love my roach so much!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 47

You deserved it 1 332

Today, a blowjob from my fiancée turned into exchanged oral, which turned into mutual masturbation while watching porn, which then turned into me being kicked out of the room because it was "weird" with me watching. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 347

You deserved it 403

The Top

Today, my girlfriend asked me to marry her, and I said yes. My parents were thrilled, but my brother is so immature, he couldn’t stop laughing that of two lesbians I’m the “girl” and my girlfriend is the “guy.” I swear I’m going to ban him from the wedding in case he tries to make a speech. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 015

You deserved it 261

Today, I asked my boyfriend what would happen if I didn’t get into the same school as him. He replied, "Then we’ll just break up." We broke up. I still don’t know what school I’m going to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 805

You deserved it 153

Today, I asked my husband if he wanted to visit my parents for Thanksgiving. He choked on his own spit to avoid answering the question. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 335

You deserved it 1 531

Today, my math teacher decided to give everyone in the class candy. He skipped me, and when another student pointed it out, his response was, "I don’t like her." FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 581

You deserved it 376

Today, I brought my girlfriend back to my place, but my abusive, homeless dad, who I haven’t spoken to in a year, had broken in to have sex with some woman in my front room, before both passing out on heroin. My girlfriend saw my dad's penis and drug stuff, and left me to clean him up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 784

You deserved it 256

Today, while teaching swim lessons, a boy was holding a noodle and claimed it was his fishing rod. Trying to be fun, I grabbed on and told him to "reel" me in. He then yells out 'YAY, I caught a whale!'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 161

You deserved it 12 400