Animals: Today, my 5 year old fish died. As I was flushing him, he started...

By dukebluedevils13 - 05/08/2011 01:47 - United States

Today, my 5 year old fish died. As I was flushing him, he started swimming again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 265

You deserved it 8 146

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 10/12/2012 22:40 - Sweden - V?ster

Today, I woke up to find my best friend lying down and unresponsive. Frightened, I tapped on the glass. He got scared and started swimming again. My best friend is a fish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 592

You deserved it 7 209

By SydIsPrettyCool - 04/08/2011 05:44 - United States

Today, my pet fish died because my drunk father microwaved it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 153

You deserved it 3 397

By That idiot - 28/08/2014 02:33 - United States - Las Vegas

Today, I won a goldfish at the amusement park. My little brother took him out of the bowl because he thought he was drowning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 407

You deserved it 3 625

So that's what the smell was!

By Anonymous - 23/11/2009 07:31 - United States

Today, I found my son's dead goldfish. Apparently, when it died he didn't flush it. Instead he placed it in one of my socks, placed that sock in a jar, and set the jar in the back of my closet. The fish has been dead for over a month. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 526

You deserved it 2 858

Murdered

By Anonymous - 16/02/2021 20:01

Today, I woke up and checked my fish tank. I thought the temperature was too low, so half asleep, I turned it up. Now all my fish are dead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 404

You deserved it 1 030

By dEpPrEsSeDgIrL - 11/11/2009 11:28 - United States

Today, my dad decided to clean my 20 gallon fish tank. I had 6 fish. One of them was called a transparent fish, clear with a bright orange tail, which was my favorite. My dad didn't see it, and dumped the water out along with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 914

You deserved it 3 923

By Anonymous - 31/12/2011 08:44 - United States

Today, my favorite fish died. To make things better my parents thought to take me out to dinner. We ate sushi. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 583

You deserved it 6 645

By gimmeasalad - 21/04/2012 06:01 - United States - Walnut Creek

Today, as I was washing my boyfriend's fishbowl, the fish did a Nemo and made an unholy leap down the drain. My immediate impulse was to flip the switch. Our kitchen now smells like mutilated fish and my boyfriend won't speak to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 148

You deserved it 36 922

By exfishowner - 27/01/2019 12:00

Today, my 3-year-old daughter put her grow-in-water salamander in my fish tank. The residue from the toy gummed up the filter and killed all the fish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 522

You deserved it 354

By fledermausi - 12/06/2012 13:02 - Hungary - Budapest

Today, I came home to my boyfriend emptying his bowels into my aquarium. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 848

You deserved it 3 113

bwenduh45 7

Friday 5 August 2011 8:52

Maybe he'll escape like nemo...

ariannaimelda 7

Friday 5 August 2011 8:53

It's his plan! He wants to go back to the ocean! Evil genius he is ;)

Comments

bc4025567575 3

Friday 5 August 2011 9:21

Are you sure it wasn't the toilet flushing that made the fish look alive again?

Introduction 0

Friday 5 August 2011 9:21

smart fish.

TaylorTotsYumm 10

Friday 5 August 2011 9:23

NEMO, NOOOO!

jigsawbanana 0

Friday 5 August 2011 9:24

Just keep swimming, just keep swimming just keep swimming , swimming , swimming. What do we do? We swim SWIM. - - - the faithful words of Dory :D

Mirorbo 26

Friday 5 August 2011 9:25

Why so many fish stories lately? D8 My own fish is on the verge of dying because of this god awful heat!!

firestarter31 0

Friday 5 August 2011 9:30

now you can get a real pet

MrDbagManSir 3

Friday 5 August 2011 9:30

WTF ASS HOLE!!! THATS ******* ANIMAL CRUELTY!! YOU DAMN BASTARD!

mythii 3

Friday 5 August 2011 9:42

You're ****** retarded.

MrDbagManSir 3

Friday 5 August 2011 9:32

14, your weird lookin. like a asain and blakie and meskin

Harlson13 0

Friday 5 August 2011 9:37

well he won't be swimming for long... no worries

Stylin_Since_97 10

Friday 5 August 2011 9:45

Five years down the drain... Or toilet:(

ifrigginheartyou 8

Friday 5 August 2011 10:08

heyy(;

Stylin_Since_97 10

Friday 5 August 2011 10:26

Hey there, message me sometime cuz I never listen when I get the stranger danger talk:)

Stylin_Since_97 10

Friday 5 August 2011 10:57

Message me sometime:) I'd love to talk and I don't give a rats ass about stranger danger:)

Keywords

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The Top

Today, while my boyfriend and I were on a picnic date out in the country, things got a little heated. When we were switching positions, he screamed and started running around. Turns out neither of us noticed the beehive in the tree above us until his dick got stung. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 297

You deserved it 1 134

Today, the girl I love who friendzoned me called to talk. She shared the marvelous things she'd done for her friend's birthday, then said, "You had a recent birthday too." Then she laughed. We'd talked multiple times without her mentioning my birthday. She ignored it on Facebook. Time for no contact. FML

I agree, your life sucks 399

You deserved it 194

The Top

Today, I was working at Chuck-E-Cheese. If that isn't enough, I was put in the mouse costume. Due to the disgusting hot smell and atmosphere in the costume, I fainted in front of a birthday party. I awoke to a little boy screaming who then kicked me in the face and ran. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 403

You deserved it 4 421

Today, I decided to give my boyfriend one last chance at fixing our failing relationship. Instead of talking about how to fix our dying relationship, he decided to game all day and ignore me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 254

You deserved it 1 917

Today, when my son told me he wanted to work with animals, I thought he meant a vet, turns out his actual career goal was to be the guy who puts the strays to sleep at the animal control centre. He got that job and I’ve never seen him happier. What monster have I raised? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 174

You deserved it 182

Today, as a delivery driver, I have been stiffed in tips by three separate people because "a delivery fee is a tip, right?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 158

You deserved it 1 078

Today, I fell in a hole in my back yard and got stuck. My mother called the fire department. They all stood around laughing and taking pictures before they helped me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 305

You deserved it 5 699

Today, I was walking down the street hand in hand with my girlfriend. I couldn't help but stare at a gorgeous girl as she bent down to pick something up. It was such a great sight, I didn't notice the metal telephone pole directly in my path. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 406

You deserved it 102 732

Same thing different taste

So that's what the smell was!

Murdered

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