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Bad timing, but just explain to her that you're very happy in your relationship and that you value her as a friend. Hope it all works out, OP!
Try to move pass it, you guys have to be friends longer than 4 years, so take this as it is and be there for each other in the future. If you guys are meant to be friends in the long term, you both will get past it
There's actually no mention of how this came about so saying the friend was selfish may be jumping the gun a bit. Another possibility is that she never mentioned it before coz she knew it was never going anywhere but was hurting about the wedding and OP could see she wasn't happy, so asked. We don't know enough about the context to know whether anyone was selfish.
You know what, instead of writing about it here, go to your friend and tell her that you're honored that she had such feelings for you, but that you can't return them. Tell them that you care for her as a friend, and nothing more. Ask her what she needs (if she wants to opt out of the wedding). Be her friend and be a grown up about it. I took so many guts to admit what she did.
great response and view point. its always nice to see logical thought process. and it did take so many guts to do what she did
I really feel for you both. She picked an awful time to tell you, but she probably thought that telling you before the wedding was preferable to telling you afterwards. I hope you manage to overcome it and remain friends, and I hope she's able to move on and fall in love with someone who will return her feelings. Congrats on the wedding though!
This was my thought as well. It's a selfish and terrible time to speak up (should have been done long before, or not at all), but from the friend's perspective, she may have seen it as her last opportunity to say anything, ever. (Speak now or forever hold your peace, as the saying goes...) And if the bride had been marrying because it was expected of her, or was a closeted lesbian or bi-girl herself and never had the opportunity to come out, it might have worked. Unfortunately for the friend, the bride seems to be very happy to be marrying her future husband. And that makes it a painful and awkward situation for everyone involved. Sorry, OP - you're in a difficult situation. Best of luck with your marriage! ربنا يسعدكو ويهنيكو
Take care of her, she's still your friend. Good luck to the both of you!
You don't determine how good of a friend is based on how much time you've spent with them. You determine it with how much stuff you two have done together in that time
Um.. Did she think that would change your mind and you would be like "Oh! Good..I'm gay too! Callin off the wedding!..".. There was no point in telling you that.. Zero. I feel sorry you have to deal with that now. :/
And that's what happens when you friendzone someone arbitrarily. It bites you in the ass.
How can you friendzone someone if you have no idea that they even like you? And you're going to "friendzone" everyone if you're in a relationship.
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Wow she just picked the perfect freaking time to tell you that... Sorry you have to go through this right before your wedding, OP.
Hope you wedding goes well besides all the drama :)