Intimacy: Today, my boyfriend and I took a nap, fully clothed. I woke up...

By Anonymous - 06/12/2013 21:37 - United States - Albuquerque

Today, my boyfriend and I took a nap, fully clothed. I woke up to him panicking. He'd had a wet dream and was scared that his sperm somehow swam through several layers of clothing and got me pregnant. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 090

You deserved it 6 008

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Same thing different taste

By Embarassed - 10/09/2009 05:32 - Canada

Today, I got out of bed and went to the bathroom. At least, I thought I did, until I woke up to my pants, sheets, and boyfriend all soaking wet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 597

You deserved it 8 129

By Light Sleeper - 14/10/2012 04:24 - United States - Evansville

Today, I woke up to my boyfriend trying to initiate sex with me in my sleep. He confessed to thinking that if he did it lightly enough, I'd think I was just dreaming. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 032

You deserved it 4 495

By Anonymous - 04/12/2013 22:08 - United States - Marsing

Today, I told my boyfriend that I've missed my period, and that I think I might be pregnant. He started panicking and ended up puking in the toilet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 470

You deserved it 12 273

It's sus

By Anonymous - 04/01/2011 09:01 - New Zealand

Today, I went down on my boyfriend while he was drunk, and he told me to get protection from his bedroom. I came back, he was passed out on the couch. His parents then came into the room after hearing noises. I was sitting there naked holding a condom while he was fast asleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 140

You deserved it 10 355

Hot and humid

By drooler - 06/08/2009 02:23 - United States

Today, I was watching a movie with my new boyfriend. I got tired so I thought it would be cute to fall asleep on him. He woke me up and said, "You got me wet." Thinking it was a joke, I said smoothly, "That's what she said!" He replied "No, really." I looked down, I'd drooled all over his shirt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 314

You deserved it 40 787

You probably do

By Anonymous - 09/08/2021 22:01

Today, I woke up after a really intense wet dream. Problem is, I'd fallen asleep in the living room. My little brother saw the whole thing. Now he's going around telling family I need to get some. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 149

You deserved it 231

By Darcy - 26/10/2011 06:58 - Australia

Today, my boyfriend and I were about to have sex. He passionately laid me down onto the bed, both of us fully naked. Pressing down on my shoulder, he ended up dislocating it. The pain made me pee myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 570

You deserved it 4 582

By cutiekenz21 - 31/07/2011 00:45 - United States

Today, my boyfriend's mother walked in on us having sex. He started crying and ran into the bathroom where my clothes were located, leaving me to deal with his mother. Naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 802

You deserved it 8 376

Thanks!

By uh-oh - 21/07/2009 19:45 - United States

Today, I was taking a shower when my boyfriend suddenly hopped in with me. We were getting a little frisky when my mom's hand unexpectedly came through the curtain, dropped a condom on the bottom of the shower, all the while saying, "Keep it safe kids!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 61 120

You deserved it 30 921

That was quick

By Anonymous - 09/09/2012 12:03 - United States - Altamonte Springs

Today, while trying to rouse my sleeping boyfriend for some morning sex, he came. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 565

You deserved it 6 832

rgri 11

Saturday 7 December 2013 5:25

Try to convince him to wear a condom everytime he takes a nap, just to be safe.

ipierson 5

Saturday 7 December 2013 5:23

This is the dumbest thing I've ever heard.

Comments

bakingqueen 7

Saturday 7 December 2013 5:33

please tell me ya'll are still in grade school... because if not he needs to go back and get schooled!

ashjo 12

Saturday 7 December 2013 5:34

seven layers of clothing, ya'll cold?

MzZombicidal 36

Saturday 7 December 2013 5:38

Several... Not seven.

Sports_guy3 28

Saturday 7 December 2013 6:54

seven could mean several, you know.

timss4 19

Saturday 7 December 2013 13:20

Several generally refers to 5 or more in quantity, 7 is a likely number or several lol just sayin

joeyl2008 29

Sunday 8 December 2013 1:42

The definition of several is "more than 2; less thas than many"

jloko16 11

Saturday 7 December 2013 5:35

Was it his first wet dream ever? And did he fall asleep while watching Teletubbies?

ninjuh_wingman 29

Saturday 7 December 2013 5:55

I'm not sure if you're insinuating that the boyfriend is a really young or that the boyfriend had a wet dream about the Teletubbies.

luckyone365 7

Saturday 7 December 2013 9:38

32: ¿Por que no los dos?

karlcolt45 19

Saturday 7 December 2013 5:37

solid logic

shhhaaarrron 12

Saturday 7 December 2013 5:38

What the... Reassure him that that's not possible... Or mess with him lol

klutz44 28

Sunday 8 December 2013 2:59

Yes, tell him you can already feel the baby kicking.

Fernando83 19

Saturday 7 December 2013 5:39

Play along and tell him you need the morning after pill. Have him go to the pharmacy and explain why he needs it, Lmao.

foxy_grampa 19

Saturday 7 December 2013 5:41

Let's hope not because any person who can come up with something that dumb shouldn't reproduce

sabrinalynn22 19

Saturday 7 December 2013 5:45

Looks like someone needs to go back to sex ed.

olpally 32

Saturday 7 December 2013 5:49

Please don't have sex with him. My god. Smh, can't believe how stupid and idiotic people can be.

Opie_Winston 7

Saturday 7 December 2013 5:55

Please read #25. Unreal

Keywords

Love Cheating Money Relatable Work My ex Jealousy Health Accident ADHD Medication Snow Weather Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Public freakouts

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