Intimacy: Today, my boyfriend came in my room dressed as Harry Potter and...

By ginny - 10/09/2009 17:18 - United States

Today, my boyfriend came in my room dressed as Harry Potter and declared that he was going to put his basilisk into my chamber of secrets. And yes, that was my first time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 261

You deserved it 8 253

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

Let me Slytherin

By Wisconsin love - 13/12/2010 17:35 - United States

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be funny to speak Parseltongue to my vagina to "prepare the Chamber of Secrets for entry". FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 998

You deserved it 10 971

By harrypottermuch - 26/11/2009 11:50 - Canada

Today, I found out there's a Harry Potter club at my school. My boyfriend is in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 342

You deserved it 43 095

Movie night

By nah - 11/06/2021 11:01

Today, my boyfriend finally convinced me to watch Harry Potter for the first time. I was bored out of my mind the entire time, and by about an hour in, all I could think about was how badly I wanted to punch Hermione for being a rude little know it all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 662

You deserved it 1 716

Alone time

By Anonymous - 21/10/2015 12:12 - Philippines - Quezon City

Today, as I snuck downstairs for a midnight movie, I witnessed my dad "polishing his wand" to Harry Potter porn in the living room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 960

You deserved it 3 773

By Degueusement - 18/08/2014 04:48 - France - Puteaux

Today, to spice things up, my boyfriend suggested we wear disguises. Amused by the idea, I accepted. That's how I ended up having sex with Gandalf. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 795

You deserved it 11 020

By Bisounours - 22/07/2011 11:23 - France

Today, I went to see the new Harry Potter movie with my boyfriend. Feeling an intense need to pee, he decided to sacrifice a few minutes of the movie before the highly-anticipated final combat to get some relief. He went through the wrong door, locking himself out. Right until the end. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 811

You deserved it 1 414

By inconnue - 18/03/2013 22:34 - France - Lyon

Today, it was my first time with my boyfriend, at his house, in his Dora the Explorer sheets. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 644

You deserved it 9 146

By harrysolo - 19/07/2009 01:26 - United States

Today, I was going on a first date with a girl I really like. We were going to see the new Harry Potter movie, and she told me she was getting all dressed up. It was only after I picked her up I realized she meant that she was dressing nicely. I was dressed as Harry Potter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 572

You deserved it 65 212

By whorecrux - 02/07/2013 03:37 - United States - Newark

Today, my boyfriend told me that he was going to buy me a "magic wand". Being a Harry Potter fanatic, I assumed he meant a replica wand. It turns out he actually meant a Magic Wand vibrator. I was more excited about the HP wand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 928

You deserved it 9 845

Easy

By pokie - 30/08/2009 05:38 - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend that my fantasy was for him to eat me out on the dinner table. My boyfriend told me his was me in a Pikachu costume. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 927

You deserved it 9 445

PimpinPenguin 0

Thursday 10 September 2009 23:12

You should have cast an enlargement spell on him

JoeDotPadilla 0

Thursday 10 September 2009 23:15

It coulda been worse. He coulda been Voldemort.

Comments

Kingdutch 3

Wednesday 9 December 2009 22:00

I want to meet him! Need an autograph. This guy's Epic Win!

bribonic_plague 0

Monday 21 December 2009 22:37

I could marry this [man] for this device. (Shakespeare.) That Harry Potter thing is actually REALLY cute. It would make me feel more comfortable about my first time.

BaileyGirl 0

Wednesday 23 December 2009 9:31

Harry Potter... seriously? Is he old enough to have sex? Wow... FYL. But YDI.

clayton18 0

Thursday 24 December 2009 9:53

Little awkward but he sounds sweet. But i just hope for your sake he doesn't really have a basalisk or its gonna Huuuurt your virgin pu*y lol

danidipperz 0

Tuesday 29 December 2009 7:02

Yeah, he TOTALLY stole that from an ad. I saw a condom add with the exact same words on it...... LMFAOOO..... That really sucks that you did it with a nerd....