Intimacy: Today, my boyfriend still couldn't work out where my clitoris...

By Anonymous - 27/09/2011 15:56 - United States

Today, my boyfriend still couldn't work out where my clitoris is. It's RIGHT THERE, you idiot. I've pointed it out, but each time it's like he needs a compass and a map or something. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 694

You deserved it 12 994

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Same thing different taste

Not going so well, is it?

By Anonymous - 29/07/2013 07:54 - United States - Riverside

Today, my boyfriend went down on me for the first time. When I didn't get off right away, he asked what he was doing wrong. I told him he was doing fine, but instead of focusing only on my vagina, he might want to pay attention to my clitoris as well. His response? "What's a clitoris?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 150

You deserved it 10 103

Nearly there

By baby_trex_arms - 05/05/2015 15:13 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I had to play the hot and cold game with my boyfriend until he found my clitoris. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 468

You deserved it 5 735

By Oops - 26/09/2011 15:35 - United Kingdom

Today, I was trying to be sexy and rub my boyfriend's un-aroused package while we were watching a movie. I couldn't find it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 952

You deserved it 7 844

Found it

By Anonymous - 01/02/2022 20:01

Today, my boyfriend was about to go down on me as foreplay before losing his virginity and he actually poked my clitoris and said, "What’s this thing?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 812

You deserved it 432

By BustedEgo - 23/03/2014 05:31 - United States - Norway

Today, my boyfriend told me he doesn't know what it's like to be turned on. Apparently, I've been doing something wrong for the past two years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 815

You deserved it 7 326

By geewhy - 26/12/2012 21:20 - United States - South Park

Today, my boyfriend discovered that if he flicks my clitoris just right, my legs both twitch spastically regardless of arousal level. He thinks it's hilarious and can no longer take sex seriously. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 709

You deserved it 5 440

Dick appointment

By Anonymous - 20/10/2020 21:01 - Canada - Spruce Grove

Today, I walked out halfway through a much anticipated dick appointment because it became apparent that he thought my clit was located somewhere on my upper thigh. He kept rubbing it and moaning, "Oooooh, I bet you like that, baby." No, sir, I certainly did not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 640

You deserved it 290

By Anonymous - 28/02/2014 21:10 - Canada - Winnipeg

Today, frustrated that my boyfriend never gives me any orgasms when we make love, I tried politely hinting that he needs to improve. To start with, I said maybe he should be more spontaneous in bed. He replied, "What, like putting it in your ass? Gotcha." Great. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 850

You deserved it 16 533

By Anonymous - 28/11/2009 05:25 - United States

Today, I was explaining the inner parts of a vagina and how they work. To my boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 633

You deserved it 6 737

By Hannah - 13/06/2013 16:19 - Australia - Caulfield North

Today, my boyfriend dumped me, accusing me of lying to him about "being a hermaphrodite". His almost total lack of knowledge about female anatomy led him to believe that my clitoris is actually an extremely tiny penis. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 365

You deserved it 6 069

steve247 2

Tuesday 27 September 2011 19:01

Try circling it with a sharpie?

orgasm_blush 4

Tuesday 27 September 2011 19:01

Hmmm. How old are you guys I feel like that might play a big part in this.

Comments

theReMEDy0723 1

Thursday 29 September 2011 7:23

At least he's making an effort. Be grateful

schealey 0

Thursday 29 September 2011 9:24

Tbh my bf was going down on me and started saying "come out come out wherever you are". You're not alone.

Anubis_81 21

Thursday 29 September 2011 12:29

I don't need a map.

elliesdreams 2

Thursday 29 September 2011 13:01

Funny how my 15 yrs old boyfriend knows where it is...

jimshrimp 0

Thursday 29 September 2011 16:34

YOU ARE A BITCH.

NinjaSmurf777 0

Thursday 29 September 2011 19:22

Im 14 and I can find it instanly. and the G-spot :P

katt_is_here 24

Friday 30 September 2011 1:53

If you are 14, what are you doing here? This place isn't for you.

lewei1314 1

Sunday 2 October 2011 14:57

So proud? You are only 14.

Rikkai 0

Thursday 29 September 2011 20:43

Hello, dumbass alert! xD

michaeljcaboose 7

Thursday 29 September 2011 22:01

Give Barry another chance! He has brain control!!!

lisha88 1

Thursday 29 September 2011 22:27

Sounds like a line from the movie "Dinner with the Schmucks"

lisha88 1

Thursday 29 September 2011 22:29

Just grab his peepee and put it in yourself

Keywords

Love Cheating Money Relatable Work Jealousy My ex Accident Health Medication ADHD Snow Weather Miscellaneous Awkward Embarrassing Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird Dating AITA Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Fight

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Today, my girlfriend will only have sex when she's on her period, because it's the only time she gets horny. She also gets body acne, bloating, and utterly foul BO and gas. The sex is so unpleasant, I'm starting to wish she just got cranky and emotional. FML

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You deserved it 211

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I agree, your life sucks 11

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The Top

Today, I snuck into my aunt's house while she was working to raid her pantry, like I do most days. Excited for a snack cake, I went to the pantry. Apparently she'd found out, because there was a lock on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 96

You deserved it 2 021

Today, I bumped into a lady, apologised and tried to continue on. She screamed assault and tried to citizen's arrest me. I've got better things to do, so I ignored her but she latched onto my leg like a toddler. I ended up dragging this insane woman up the street until she finally let go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 077

You deserved it 181

Today, I was checking out a customer who seemed quite friendly. As I finished, he reached slightly over the counter and I impulsively reached out and shook his hand. He gave me a dumbfounded look and said, "Can I have my change please?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 329

You deserved it 35 123

Today, I caught my best and only friend snooping in my sister's underwear drawer. I don’t know if I should tell on him, or pretend it didn’t happen. What do I do? FML

I agree, your life sucks 695

You deserved it 140

Today, I managed to cut myself on a piece of chocolate. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 855

You deserved it 9 140

Today, while installing a deadbolt on my closet, I did it wrong. It closed but wouldn't lock so I had to re-install it. Sitting on the floor of my closet, I shut it to make sure it was installed correctly. I locked myself in for twenty minutes, home alone, before kicking the door down. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 868

You deserved it 50 528