Miscellaneous: Today, my brother handed me a sandwich that I'd asked him to...

By Anonymous - 24/09/2011 23:32 - United States

Today, my brother handed me a sandwich that I'd asked him to make for me. Halfway through eating the sandwich, he started laughing hysterically. I still don't know what was in it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 298

You deserved it 7 218

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Well played

By FUCK THE PIGS - 26/01/2013 20:44 - United States - Oakland

Today, during lunch, my coworker offered me her food, claiming she was full. I was still quite hungry, so I accepted it. Halfway through eating the sandwiches, my boss walked in and started interrogating people over who took his lunch. I quickly realized I was the one eating it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 564

You deserved it 4 180

By groom - 12/12/2008 02:30 - France

Today, I cut my nice and tasty home-made sandwich in half to give to a homeless man. He tasted it, pulled an unimpressed face, and then stuck it in his pocket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 498

You deserved it 3 152

Snack time

By oops... - 12/09/2014 05:50 - Canada - Sylvan Lake

Today, my daughter was going to Bulk Barn so I asked her to pick me up something to snack on. When she got home, she brought over a bag and without listening to her explain what it was, I began eating it. She looked at me confused, then began laughing. It was a dog treat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 606

You deserved it 29 763

By ihatedogs - 22/06/2009 04:04 - United States

Today, my brother came down to my house, bringing his untrained puppies with him. As we were eating dinner, I dropped part of my sandwich in a liquid that was on the tablecloth. Thinking it was water, I ate it. As I chewed, I realized the liquid wasn't water. My sandwich was dipped in dog urine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 895

You deserved it 19 916

By who wants spaghetti - 17/12/2015 03:42 - United States - Oconomowoc

Today, during a family dinner, I witnessed my younger brother casually slip his hand down the back of his pants, take it out, sniff each finger individually, before stirring his hand in his spaghetti and continue to eat normally. I was the only one who saw this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 884

You deserved it 1 555

By argfarblewarblearble - 07/08/2015 13:49 - Canada - Edmonton

Today, I was laying on the couch, listening to music. I guess my brother noticed that I was yawning a lot, because when I opened my mouth and yawned again, he dropped one of his rancid toenail clippings into my mouth, then broke into hysterical laughter at my freaking out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 897

You deserved it 2 331

By Anonymous - 02/11/2013 17:34 - United States - Rowland Heights

Today, my husband and I were arguing, but I dropped it so we could calm down before discussing the matter again. Later on, he made us lasagna. The moment I swallowed the first mouthful, he smirked, then started snickering uncontrollably. What the fuck did he do to my food? FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 640

You deserved it 5 679

By Anonymous - 03/03/2012 03:05 - United States

Today, I was chatting to my brother on Skype. Out of the blue, and just as I read the punchline to a hilarious joke, he said his girlfriend had been cheating on him. I couldn't stifle my side-splitting laughter, and he's been ignoring my calls since. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 877

You deserved it 10 046

By Anonymous - 14/04/2011 17:35 - United States

Today, I made my young niece lunch. After she claimed to have eaten it all, she wanted to go out and play. I was putting my shoes on when I found part of the sandwich I made her stuffed in my shoe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 426

You deserved it 4 891

By DeeDee - 04/02/2014 22:08 - Austria - Vienna

Today, my brother came to my first standup comedy act. He'd apparently read my material beforehand, and kept finishing my jokes for me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 743

You deserved it 5 448

Freeze_fml 16

Sunday 25 September 2011 9:07

Probably some homemade mayo.

xlorawrz 9

Sunday 25 September 2011 9:07

... So did you stop eating the sandwich when he started laughing?

Comments

littlemissalex 3

Sunday 25 September 2011 9:53

This is why I don't take food from my brother.

Darklord53 0

Sunday 25 September 2011 9:59

Wait.........you made HIM make the sammich? What kind of woman are you?

amira101 20

Sunday 25 September 2011 10:10

Maybe your bro, watched The Help?

elisabeth1_fml 0

Sunday 25 September 2011 10:28

Mmmh chocolate pie lol

ScarletBloom 14

Sunday 25 September 2011 10:17

He didn't wash his hands after cleaning his ass before making the sandwich.

topgearrules100 0

Sunday 25 September 2011 10:19

Man nectar

leadman1989 15

Sunday 25 September 2011 10:26

It was Epic meal time he filled that sandwich up with gay bacon and A special SHAUCE!!! Wait that was lame I'm not drunk enough and this **** isn't gay enough give me a minute. :)

elisabeth1_fml 0

Sunday 25 September 2011 10:26

I had to make my brothers sandwiches for school and one day made a dry cat food sandwich for him. Since he used to eat dry cat food I thought he would enjoy it. Worth the beating I got and still laugh about it 30 years on.