Intimacy: Today, my co-worker finally gave me a check for the money he... - FML

By Patrick R - 09/06/2011 16:01 - United States

Spicy

Today, my co-worker finally gave me a check for the money he owes me. In the memo line, he wrote "for swallowing". Now I have to go cash it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 171

You deserved it 7 000

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 16/09/2012 13:46 - United States

Today, I was finally paid back by a friend who wrote a check out. Not really looking at it, I went to the bank to deposit it. As I handed it to the teller, I noticed that he had written "sex" in the "for" memo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 563

You deserved it 4 118

By Anonymous - 11/07/2012 05:29 - United States - Dallas

Today, my boss asked me if he could pay me in gum. Thinking he was playing around, I agreed. He wasn't playing around. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 014

You deserved it 9 874

What?

By Patrick - 29/10/2020 03:08 - Trinidad and Tobago - Couva

Today, my coworker got a raise by making our boss give me a pay cut for doing his job while he was slacking off. As we were heading home for the day, he found $100. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 231

You deserved it 103

Drunken antics

By qx5 - 08/01/2011 22:05 - Canada

Today, I put my paycheck in my wallet, intending to cash it in the next day. Later on, I met up with a friend and went to a party. I ended up getting so drunk, I gave away my $400 check in exchange for a pack of smokes, thinking it was a $5 bill. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 524

You deserved it 58 097

By Elmoo - 01/06/2012 01:20 - Netherlands

Today, I was at work when a customer, who was going to pay for her groceries, started sorting through her money. She put some coins in her mouth, seemed to suck on them for a while, and then gave them to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 576

You deserved it 1 951

Seize the means of production

By vikts - 29/05/2012 17:52 - Luxembourg - Olm

Today, I discovered that as thanks for my successful efforts to increase my company's monthly revenue, my dumbass of a boss has been awarded a pay bonus. He's wasted no time telling everyone about the sports car he's planning to buy with it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 343

You deserved it 1 955

By Anonymous - 13/05/2014 19:23 - Canada - Charlottetown

Today, everyone at the office was finally presented with the bonuses our boss had promised to pay us by the end of last year. Turns out he was never authorized to promise any such thing, so he ended up just giving us signed "thank you" letters instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 914

You deserved it 3 421

All in a day's work

By Steve-noh - 10/08/2018 23:30

Today, at my job as a waiter I sharted myself while taking an order. They tipped me $20 and wrote "for new underwear" on the receipt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 161

You deserved it 595

The customer is sometimes devious

By dontgivemechecks - 16/03/2020 14:00

Today, I found out that I accidentally returned a customer her $147 check she had written out to pay for her groceries and receive cash back. The lady got free groceries and money, and I'm now losing my job. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 273

You deserved it 700

By A. - 15/04/2009 07:48 - Canada

Today, after two weeks of living on plain pasta, I finally got my paycheck and was excited that I'd get real food, and ride the subway instead of exhausting my malnourished body with the two-hour walk to work. My surname was misspelt on the check; the bank is holding it for ten days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 81 302

You deserved it 4 110

Next

Top comments

Idonebeenhad 17

Thursday 9 June 2011 23:27

How'd it taste?

mattmadden 0

Friday 10 June 2011 0:10

A brain...

Comments

meredithxjane 0

Friday 10 June 2011 0:29

lol! that's too funny. I needed that laugh thanks

DeLpHe3zY 7

Friday 10 June 2011 8:21

youre welcome

eminemchick 19

Friday 10 June 2011 0:31

how much did he give you?;)

DaM_iM_sO_nY 2

Friday 10 June 2011 0:37

your rich b!(;:/...... you can sue him for harassment .....unless you Sucked him off

chuck1986 0

Friday 10 June 2011 0:38

That's technically work place sexual harassment

sylverdrag_fml 9

Friday 10 June 2011 17:29

Right. In fact, you could go see him and mention this detail just in passing, and get another check out of him, with a premium. Alternatively, a good right hook in the ribs should do very nicely, but seeing that you didn't, you probably don't have the guts.

iltoudemone 0

Friday 10 June 2011 0:39

lol I'm so gonna do that now to someone

sylverdrag_fml 9

Friday 10 June 2011 17:33

Just make sure it's not me, otherwise you will have to eat through a straw

mismonroe 0

Friday 10 June 2011 0:44

Ummm... About that 200 you owe me, OP.

samikay23 0

Friday 10 June 2011 0:47

omg that is so funny!

minnymouse20 13

Friday 10 June 2011 0:49

my mom said it's better to swallow.

Miss_Kristen 10

Friday 10 June 2011 9:18

Who else checked Minnymouse's profile? :)

shonda89 0

Friday 10 June 2011 1:00

lol

Lehk 9

Friday 10 June 2011 1:05

file a complaint with HR

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Keywords

Break-ups Love Christmas Poopoo peepee Gross Miscellaneous Argument Ironic Awkward Friends Cute Haircut Relatable Work Cars You're fired Health Covid Cheating Jealousy Kids Parenting Family DIY Cats Roommate Sex Intimacy Am I overreacting? Management

The Top

Today, I went to visit my fiancé's dying grandmother in the hospital with him. She started talking to us about living each day to the fullest. His grandmother points to me and says, "Life is short. That's why you don't waste any time screwing girls who look like that." FML

I agree, your life sucks 77 780

You deserved it 4 168

Today, my parents were helping me construct my bed. We ended up not having enough screws to properly secure the frame. My dad mentioned that it might cause problems if I got a girl into my bed. My mom said, "Don't worry about it, we all know that's not going to happen." FML

I agree, your life sucks 104 597

You deserved it 9 210

The Top

Today, I went on an a date with a guy I met online. We were waiting in line at Starbucks when he turned to me and said, "Do you want anything?" Just before I was about to answer, he practically shoved in front of me and paid for himself. The cashier looked more horrified than I did. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 368

You deserved it 505

Today, my family and I were about to watch the video my dad took of me walking across the stage at my high school graduation. Turns out he recorded the wrong kid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 244

You deserved it 3 123

Today, my girlfriend and I made lists of what celebrities we're interested in. The first one she listed wasn't a celebrity - it was my brother. He's spending the weekend with us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 901

You deserved it 4 073

Today, my boyfriend started to suck on my boob, which I quite enjoy, until he said he was breastfeeding and called me "Mummy". I don't think I can ever let his mouth near my boobs ever again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 025

You deserved it 3 406

Today, at work, a woman demanded a refund for a video game. She had no receipt, so due to company policy, I couldn't refund her. She reacted by loudly accusing me of being racist, then yelled that she'd see me in court as she finally stormed out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 091

You deserved it 3 139

Today, I skipped class. I had never done it before, so I was a little nervous, but it was on my bucket list so I gave it a shot. Later, I found out that the professor cancelled class within the first five minutes. Everyone who showed was given extra credit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 719

You deserved it 5 516