Miscellaneous: Today, my date arrived far earlier than expected to pick me up....

By stubblebutt - 13/11/2009 12:17 - Australia

Today, my date arrived far earlier than expected to pick me up. Apparently my mother decided to show him to my room anyway. When the door swung open, I happened to be butt naked in front of the mirror, trying to pick out an ingrown hair on my bum. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 762

You deserved it 5 997

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Mammy's boy

By Anonymous - 14/04/2023 22:00

Today, I went on a first date with a guy I met online. We hit it off, and he invited me back to his place. As soon as we got there, his mother came out of nowhere and started interrogating me about "my intentions." FML

I agree, your life sucks 896

You deserved it 167

Tinder surprise

By Anonymous - 14/01/2023 04:00

Today, a woman turned up uninvited at my house, ready for our first date. After some embarrassed investigating, it turns out my mother signed me up to Tinder and arranged a date, all without telling me, because she refuses to believe I prefer solitude over dating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 083

You deserved it 123

By Starchyld - 11/11/2009 12:21 - Canada

Today, I went on blind date with a guy because both our moms thought we'd like eachother. Things were going really well until I got up to go to the bathroom and he says: "My mom was right, you do have perfect breedin' hips!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 938

You deserved it 4 135

By obtuse_ballsack - 04/06/2012 20:37 - Croatia - Zagreb

Today, I desperately needed to pee, but my mom was in the bathroom taking a shower, so I waited patiently until she finished. Just as I was about to go in, my half-naked dad rushed ahead, said "Going somewhere, son?" and shut the door on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 717

You deserved it 2 759

By Anonymous - 05/04/2011 18:48 - United Kingdom

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house and we were just about to kiss. Until his mum walked in saying his girlfriend was at the door. I thought I was already there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 866

You deserved it 5 294

By mothtal - 03/06/2012 16:13 - Bulgaria

Today, my boyfriend picked me up to take me on a date. Just as we were about to drive away, my dad ran out of the house in his underwear and started yelling that he'd kill my boyfriend if I wasn't back home within the hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 563

You deserved it 2 266

By Anonymous - 13/03/2010 09:17 - United Kingdom

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house, when I needed the loo. The door was ajar, so I walked into his bathroom, sat down, and started to pee. I then looked up to see the shocked face of his dad sitting naked in the bath. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 772

You deserved it 10 098

Put it away!

By Need eye bleach - 05/04/2023 17:00 - United States

Today, a woman had a wardrobe malfunction right in front of me. As if that's not awkward enough, that woman was my own mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 694

You deserved it 146

Not now, mom!

By Anonymous - 28/09/2020 18:02 - United States - Gillette

Today, my mother showed up to pick something up from my house. I was sleeping and before I knew it she was in my bedroom, jumping on my bed, saying hi to my ex-girlfriend who she thought was with me. It wasn't my ex, and I doubt that girl will ever want to hang out again after that awkward morning. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 282

You deserved it 199

By noooo - 08/08/2011 07:10 - United States

Today, my new friend and I went out to a concert. When we came back to her house, she ran upstairs and left me alone. Suddenly, a naked man came into my view and I stared at him, horrified. Great way to meet her Dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 022

You deserved it 2 707

zOMGitsdc 0

Friday 13 November 2009 21:02

Please tell me this wasn't a first date.. cause if you are concerned with an ingrown hair on your ass for a first date, you have issues.

DJ_Grim 0

Friday 13 November 2009 21:17

You should have just looked at them and said with a straight face "Well, can you help?".

Comments

LonghornsFan1 0

Friday 13 November 2009 21:23

Wow LOL

allmidnighteyes 10

Friday 13 November 2009 21:29

Soooo, why try that right before a date? Were you planning on seducing him into rear-ending you later on that night?

boone_fml 0

Friday 13 November 2009 21:36

the only time you remove ingrown hairs is when you're planning to have sex?

allmidnighteyes 10

Friday 13 November 2009 21:37

You don't? Freakazoid.

becccers 14

Thursday 22 January 2015 6:41

Off topic, but I love your profile picture!

IceCream53423 0

Friday 13 November 2009 21:38

did he ask you out again? ;)

TheButler 0

Sunday 15 November 2009 18:40

well im in year 10 and everyone says "Ask out" it's a normal thing to say.... and why the **** do you care?

ninjobliveus13 0

Friday 13 November 2009 21:41

Woah! When did "butt naked" become improper English??? Must hve missed that memo. As far as OP goes, if I were him I'd be impressed you made the effort to remove an ingrown hair but your buttocks. Hopefully I would also be impressed at the sight of you naked.

ninjobliveus13 0

Friday 13 November 2009 21:43

"Today, I misspelled a few words when trying to comment on an FML post. FML" I honestly think moderators would accept that.

jordiepoo 0

Friday 13 November 2009 21:58

wow, this page of comments made me laugh. i agree, you remove the ingrown hairs when you have time and sometimes they hurt so maybe she wanted to get the pain away goshh. well i hope you still got to go on a date anyways!

WorkThatButt 2

Friday 13 November 2009 21:59

Read my name baby. :)

Pats_Fan 0

Friday 13 November 2009 22:11

How come no one has pointed out that she was pulling an ingrown hair FROM HER BUM. FYL for being so hairy that You have ingrown hairs on your bum. I highly doubt HER date was that impressed with HER hairy butt. Once again FYL. Try waxing, It usually helps tame the ingrown hairs.