Miscellaneous: Today, my dog took a dump beside the air intake for our furnace.... - FML

By Anonymous - 08/12/2011 04:27 - Canada

Today, my dog took a dump beside the air intake for our furnace. The house now smells like dog crap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 975

You deserved it 4 073

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 14/05/2016 14:26 - Italy - Bologna

Today, my dog apparently vomited straight down a heating vent while I was out. The stench was so bad that when I got home and the smell hit me, I threw up too. Looks like I'll be spending a few days with my mother as the house airs out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 927

You deserved it 1 265

Bad boy

By Anonymous - 31/01/2017 10:13 - United States - Gladewater

Today, after weeks of looking for the source of an awful smell in our house, I found out our dog has been climbing over our loft banister, into the attic, and shitting. There were over twenty mounds. It took me almost four hours to clean up, and it still stinks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 558

You deserved it 765

By aaalias34 - 26/02/2010 11:13 - United States

Today, my dog farted. Immediately, he turned around to sniff his stink then furiously licked his butthole. He then licked my nose. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 996

You deserved it 8 456

Spray it loud

By anonymous - 16/08/2015 03:16 - United States - Rock Hill

Today, we learned that our dog can run and urinate simultaneously. The entire house smells like piss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 284

You deserved it 2 084

By life_suxxx - 17/12/2009 06:09 - United States

Today, I come home to find that my dog has taken a dump on my bed. I quickly put on my house shoes to avoid possibly stepping on any other of his turds. I felt something squish all over my right foot. He also took a dump in my house shoe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 557

You deserved it 4 902

By hadtocleanthemess - 28/06/2011 12:35 - Canada

Today, my dog got his head stuck in a container, panicked, and shat himself all over the living room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 885

You deserved it 4 202

Good boy

By Anonymous - 06/10/2023 19:30 - Canada

Today, I took my dog to the park. It had recently rained, and he started rolling in something unidentifiable. When I got home, I discovered it was a mixture of mud and who knows what else. Now my house smells like a swamp. FML

I agree, your life sucks 486

You deserved it 269

Bad boy

By Anonymous - 05/07/2019 14:00

Today, I went home for lunch. Upon opening the door, I smelled something horrid. My dog had opened his cage, eaten all the dog treats, and had diarrhea all over my bed and bedroom floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 693

You deserved it 303

Bad boy

By Really - 14/05/2023 08:00 - United States

Today, my roommate let his dog out. Not even five minutes later, she walked into my room and dropped a deuce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 723

You deserved it 87

By Mr Pippin - 09/09/2018 22:00

Today, after frolicking in some long grass near a lake, my dog got back in the car smelling strongly of poop. Upon further investigation, I discovered that a sewer had overflowed in the area. My dog rolled around in human faeces. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 988

You deserved it 339

Next

Top comments

StoryOfTheYear 14

Thursday 8 December 2011 8:48

Hot shit. ._.

ten_go86 5

Thursday 8 December 2011 8:54

take a dump near your dog's house so he'll know what shit smells like

Comments

OfficeNinja 5

Thursday 8 December 2011 14:57

Your dog is awesome, and apparently HATES the Christmas sweater you make it wear.

Iknoweverything 29

Thursday 8 December 2011 15:30

There is this beautiful thing called a shovel... all you have to do is scoop the poop somewhere else, and let your house air out for awhile. PROBLEM SOLVED.

nikkirenn 6

Thursday 8 December 2011 15:42

74 knows what's up. No more dog poop, no more shit smell. Ta-da!!

CoDAddict56 0

Thursday 8 December 2011 16:33

That sucks. Spray febreeze all over your house.

2dog 15

Thursday 8 December 2011 16:57

That's sad

beebananaz88 0

Thursday 8 December 2011 16:59

Warm poop and coco on a winter night.

hateevryone 14

Thursday 8 December 2011 17:01

put him outside. that's just nasty.

alycion 38

Thursday 8 December 2011 18:18

Petsmart sells a line of candles that help with that. I just got over my house smelling like a kennel from two dogs with stomach colds.

craZ3 0

Thursday 8 December 2011 20:27

time to teach ur dog a lesson he'll never forget

KVKdragon 26

Thursday 8 December 2011 21:17

Boil maple syrup on a stove and it might clear out the scent. You can do the same thing to get rid of the smell of death.

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The Top

Today, my boyfriend started to suck on my boob, which I quite enjoy, until he said he was breastfeeding and called me "Mummy". I don't think I can ever let his mouth near my boobs ever again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 006

You deserved it 3 398

Today, there was a long queue at the store, and behind me were two senior citizens. I wanted to do a good deed, so I said, "Cut before me in line, I have all the time in the world." My reward? The old man scolded me because I supposedly insinuated that they were old, and only had a short time left to live. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 423

You deserved it 13 444

The Top

Today, I realized my ex-boyfriend is still in love with me. I told him I could never date him or be anything more than friends, telling him it’s creepy, but his response was, “Oh, well, my autism makes me see things differently.” I can’t get through to this guy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 237

You deserved it 221

Today, I ran 5 miles to catch the bus I take to university after missing my connection. When I got to the bus stop, I realized I had left my U-Pass on my desk at home. On top of the assignment that was due. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 048

You deserved it 8 493

Today, my temporarily unemployed husband had a brain wave. I'm five months pregnant and we have a 4-year-old. He thinks we should start a family vlog on YouTube, so we can get rich. I hate those awful family vlogs with a passion. FML

I agree, your life sucks 940

You deserved it 139

Today, a guest at the hotel I work at started shouting at me. Apparently the street vendor selling sunglasses outside the hotel sold her a pair of 'genuine' Ray Bans for $5. She wanted me to phone the police because she realized two days later they were fake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 286

You deserved it 1 835

Today, my fiancé's mother made him pack his stuff and move to Montana while I was at work. I came home to a half-written note because she wouldn’t let him finish. We own a house together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 474

You deserved it 468

Today, I discovered that when I sleep, I go to the bathroom to poop and don’t flush the toilet. I live with three roommates who all wake up before I do. FML

I agree, your life sucks 749

You deserved it 354