Animals: Today, my escape artist of a dog got out. She not only chased...

By Cat vs. Dog - 28/04/2014 21:03 - United States - Laramie

Today, my escape artist of a dog got out. She not only chased someone else's cat into someone else's house, but promptly defecated all over their living room floor out of excitement. That's one way to meet the new neighbors. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 192

You deserved it 5 067

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Same thing different taste

Bad boy

By Really - 14/05/2023 08:00 - United States

Today, my roommate let his dog out. Not even five minutes later, she walked into my room and dropped a deuce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 723

You deserved it 88

Scaredy cat

By poop - 24/03/2016 18:15 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I discovered my cat is bathroom shy when I accidentally walked in on him relieving himself. He jumped about 3 feet in the air and bolted out, launching feces and pee all over the bathroom, hallway, and my shoes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 063

You deserved it 2 559

By Anonymous - 23/04/2011 05:11 - United States

Today, my dog disappeared for an hour. After I'd called her name repeatedly, she crawled out from under my bed, threw up on my feet, and then happily walked out the room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 103

You deserved it 4 176

By Anonymous - 14/05/2009 17:46 - United States

Today, I thought it would be funny to sneak up behind my cat and scare it with a loud "boo!" The cat responded by jumping up, and running across my apartment, which would have been fine, except for the fact she left a trail of liquid shit everywhere she went. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 057

You deserved it 104 327

Hissing booth

By Carey - 03/09/2023 16:00 - Australia

Today, I took my cat to the vet for a regular check-up. In the waiting room, she escaped from her carrier and created chaos, knocking over supplies, and hissing at everyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 508

You deserved it 273

Splat!

By Anonymous - 11/05/2020 14:00

Today, I have a case of diarrhea. How did I find out? I got startled by my dog jumping up to greet me, and I shat all over the kitchen floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 554

You deserved it 215

Thug life

By secretagentsam00 - 31/03/2020 23:00

Today, I found out my dog is a felon. He broke into a neighbor's house by breaking in through the screen door. He also vandalized their property by shitting on their carpet. Our neighbors are now considering suing us. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 624

You deserved it 561

By nackpattywhackgiveadogabone - 23/09/2010 11:01 - United States

Today, after I got off work, as I walked into the house, I noticed something running across the floor towards me and out of complete terror I kicked it halfway across my living room, not knowing what it was. Turns out it was my roommate's new puppy. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 080

You deserved it 50 519

By MoncaBang - 29/01/2009 21:25 - United States

Today, my cat fell into the toilet, jumped out, and ran straight to hide in my bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 685

You deserved it 3 453

Treasure hunt

By Catois - 05/03/2010 05:17 - United States

Today, I caught my dog attempting to shit on the carpet. When I saw him, I screamed. Startled, he ran around the house, continuing to take his shit. Now, I don't have to clean up a nice pile, I get to go on a scavenger hunt and find all of the scattered turds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 775

You deserved it 13 227

iLike2Teabag 27

Tuesday 29 April 2014 6:44

Oh thank god. I thought I was the only one who defecates when I'm excited.

person961 9

Tuesday 29 April 2014 6:43

If I was your neighbor I would be more amazed than angry. How the hell does a dog chase a cat into another persons house? Offer to clean the mess for them, show you can be a kind person and I'm sure they'll relax a little if they're mad.

Comments

mkcherry 14

Tuesday 29 April 2014 10:28

I would be beyond pissed if I was your neighbor I hate other peoples animals but if you pay for the damages everything will probably work out. When my boyfriend had an escaping weimerainer we put a lead on him that was very long (12+ feet) so he could get around the yard but not escape the fences.

WeskersSexslave 15

Tuesday 29 April 2014 10:52

Dogs are awesome.

randomness273821 5

Tuesday 29 April 2014 12:58

We'll it's his living room now and yours by association

95DeVille 13

Tuesday 29 April 2014 17:12

Territorial expansion at it's most primitive form.

worldclassrager 39

Tuesday 29 April 2014 13:44

Better keep that dog on a short leash

Ducklett 11

Tuesday 29 April 2014 14:20

I'm sure in several years to come if you're chatting to the neighbours it'll be a funny story, for now best to offer what you can to make up for it. Your dog certainly knows how to make an impression!

hellphone_fml 37

Tuesday 29 April 2014 14:21

I would suggest putting him on the leashes that stake into the ground, but my dog knows how to unhook them and still run away.

Jst4kicks 16

Tuesday 29 April 2014 14:45

Your dog sounds awesome OP!

skyeyez9 24

Tuesday 29 April 2014 15:26

My dog chased a neighbor's dog inside their house and attacked it in their kitchen. He was an australian cattle dog and would not stop trying to nip its legs. So he could have been trying to herd their big labradoodle with curly white poofy hair. He prob thought it was a sheep. Either way, it was my fault. I kept him on a leash from then on. I felt terrible and bought a big basket full of dog treats and dog toys for their pup.