Miscellaneous: Today, my father told me to take the car and get some groceries....

By me. - 12/11/2012 04:30 - United States - Fort Wayne

Today, my father told me to take the car and get some groceries. An hour and a half later, coming home with the groceries, I see the cops all around my house because my dad had called them, thinking that I had run away and stolen the car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 126

You deserved it 1 727

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Same thing different taste

Reported

By bubblzzz - 21/06/2019 16:01

Today, my father called the cops saying I stole his car. It's my car, but his name is on the title. Why did he report it stolen? Because rather than taking him to a bar and being his designated driver, I went to a job interview. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 280

You deserved it 145

By Anonymous - 02/12/2011 06:15 - United States

Today, I saw my dad for the first time in ten years. He was stealing my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 052

You deserved it 2 719

By SenescentSouthernBoy - 17/08/2009 08:42 - United States

Today, I borrowed a roommate's car to get groceries. I came out to find the car stolen. I called the cops, and the responding officer took the info and drove me home to give the roomie the bad news in person. 15 minutes later, they found the car. I'd parked it on the opposite side of the lot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 482

You deserved it 60 802

By Anonymous - 22/12/2012 06:31

Today, due to bad weather, my dad let me take his car to drive to my apartment 3 hours away. I only realized when I got there that my keys were still sitting on my parents' kitchen counter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 111

You deserved it 11 342

Busted

By Anonymous - 20/12/2009 03:08 - United States

Today, I was approached by a policeman who asked me if I was the owner of the green Camry. Turns out my parents decided to teach me a lesson for lying where I had been by reporting the car stolen. They also wouldn't answer my one phone call. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 019

You deserved it 9 099

Confess!

By hitandrun - 10/08/2009 18:28 - United States

Today, I hit a parked car and fled because I was so scared. Four hours later, the cops showed up at my house so I broke down crying confessing everything. Turns out, they weren't there about the car I hit. They were alerting me about the string of burglaries in my neighborhood recently. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 225

You deserved it 76 119

Drunken antics

By DevilsTemptation - 29/08/2019 02:01 - United Kingdom - Dundee

Today, my dad got extremely drunk, so I took away his car keys and left on foot. When I came back, I saw that he had broken down my door. Now my dad is mad at me for not giving him the keys when he was drunk, and I'm door-less. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 777

You deserved it 162

By FathersDay - 22/06/2009 05:27 - United States

Today, I told my dad I couldn't make the trip to see him this weekend because I had to work. I surprised him by driving ten hours, and while he was out, I let myself in with my key and hid behind the couch for when he came in. He walked in. I jumped out. I then had to call 911. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 414

You deserved it 21 064

By truth - 10/02/2012 01:49 - United States

Today, my boss reported to the police that a suspicious car has been parked outside the store late at night. I walked outside and my car was gone. He had my car towed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 317

You deserved it 2 191

By dani911 - 15/07/2009 01:16 - United States

Today, I noticed a car following me all the way to my house. It was dark so I got really nervous and called the police. The person got out of the car. It was my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 711

You deserved it 37 368

SkoomaKi 27

Monday 12 November 2012 9:15

Groceries Theft Auto.

rahulcool7 14

Monday 12 November 2012 9:10

He seems like he is a very trusting guy

Comments

DocBastard 38

Monday 12 November 2012 10:34

Maybe you shouldn't have yelled "HAHA FREEDOM! SO LONG, BITCHES!!" as you peeled out of the driveway.

BlowinChronic 18

Monday 12 November 2012 12:56

Oh... That isn't normal behavior?

Calingaladha 21

Monday 12 November 2012 15:03

Oh, I thought OP had yelled: "YOU MAY ALL GO TO HELL, AND I WILL GO TO PUBLIX!"

jem970 19

Monday 12 November 2012 15:04

I do that all the time when I leave though Doc. Obviously the dad is jumping to conclusions :) lol jk. Great post on your blog BTW.

jem970 19

Monday 12 November 2012 15:07

Hahahahahahahahahahaha that just made my morning. Bravo sir :)

kakarot2 11

Monday 12 November 2012 16:38

82, you have a little shit on your tooth. Don't forget to brush your teeth after kissing ass.

Enslaved 36

Monday 12 November 2012 10:45

Hope Krispy Kreme doughnuts were on your shopping list!

martin_martian7 11

Monday 12 November 2012 11:11

Grocery shopping takes a lot of time you know!

stormchaser24 24

Monday 12 November 2012 12:06

Why would that many cops show up? My brother did the same thing and we had only one show up.

RealZA_fml 20

Monday 12 November 2012 12:56

Sounds like he sent you out so he could get high, and was tripping so hard he forgot he sent you in the first place.

sweetmama88 6

Monday 12 November 2012 12:59

You probably took to long at the food store, and he just freaked out.

safaeita 32

Monday 12 November 2012 14:41

Seriously? Your father must be really paranoid, or maybe he had reason to believe so, op have you been recently acting suspiciously and talking about plans in some other state?

doglover100 28

Monday 12 November 2012 15:08

Did he forget he asked you?

cheshireau 26

Monday 12 November 2012 16:17

Does he have dementia? Or you could of said by before leaving confirming to him that's where you were headed.

ByronJess 17

Monday 12 November 2012 17:28

Well, if OP hasn't gone to Wal*Mart he would have been home after just half an hut and his dad never would have had to worry. But since the FML says he was gone an hour and a half, the only logical explanation is that he was waiting in line at Walmart.