Intimacy: Today, my fiancé and I were having sex. In the middle of it he...

By Chemist-why - 30/01/2015 15:11 - United States - San Francisco

Today, my fiancé and I were having sex. In the middle of it he said, "I want us to be covalent bonds". I didn't understand what he meant, and he actually stopped to explain it to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 579

You deserved it 8 896

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Same thing different taste

By robm - 26/07/2010 20:15 - United States

Today, while my boyfriend and I were having sex, he told me I was the love of his life. Afterwards, he clarified his statement. I was the love of his life, because I was in his life at that moment. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 431

You deserved it 4 672

Bad timing

By KrissyBearr - 31/12/2011 01:36 - United States

Today, while having sex, I told my boyfriend that I loved him. I could feel him go soft inside me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 415

You deserved it 10 013

By Anonymous - 13/01/2011 21:10 - Lebanon

Today, I was having sex with my fiancé when he stopped and said, "Boy, what I wouldn't give for a burger right now." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 394

You deserved it 5 001

By Anonymous - 25/10/2014 02:48 - United States - Gainesboro

Today, I was making love to my boyfriend. In the heat of the moment, I said his name. He immediately stopped, gave me a deadly serious look and said "Huh? What?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 223

You deserved it 4 935

By Username - 21/12/2010 05:09

Today, my boyfriend asked me to have phone sex with him. However, it seems he doesn't quite know what it is, so now he wants me to explain it to him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 611

You deserved it 4 438

Let's say, hypothetically…

By Anonymous - 08/12/2014 04:35 - United States - Long Beach

Today, my boyfriend gave me a long, philosophical explanation about how he doesn't love me, but we should still have sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 853

You deserved it 3 869

By dummy - 17/02/2012 00:03 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting frisky in bed. He mumbled something that sounded like "I love you." I replied "I love you too baby", to which he laughed then said, "I said I wanted you to blow me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 733

You deserved it 5 666

By Trainwreck - 13/12/2009 17:56 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were having a serious talk. He told me that I was a quick-tempered emotional train wreck. He then said, "You know how we talked about getting married? Now the only way I'd marry you was if hell froze over." He smiled, gave me a kiss, and went to bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 007

You deserved it 6 733

Douche

By YouDontSay - 10/05/2015 15:35 - Ireland - Dublin

Today, I had sex with a guy I've liked for ages. We were lying in his bed afterwards, and he mumbled the word "happy". I thought it was really sweet, until he repeated himself. "My girlfriend probably won't be too happy about this." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 583

You deserved it 6 917

By Busted - 21/10/2009 21:25 - United States

Today, I was with my boyfriend, and things were getting pretty heated. Trying to be sexy, I told him that every time we touched was a guilty pleasure. He rolled off of me, and said "Oh, you're married too?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 204

You deserved it 4 277

Nymeria_fml 25

Saturday 31 January 2015 0:09

I guess it's more of a hydrogen bond now, right? Not so strong.

Lebeaugars95 20

Saturday 31 January 2015 0:13

Chemistry just isn't your thing, Na mean?

Comments

teentee401 36

Saturday 31 January 2015 0:30

That's pretty damn romantic if you ask me.

buckdharma 36

Saturday 31 January 2015 0:35

Was this the nth time he had to explain this?

CoolCookie210 22

Saturday 31 January 2015 0:42

Marry that guy

ohSNAPyall 26

Saturday 31 January 2015 4:37

On Mole Day.

buckdharma 36

Saturday 31 January 2015 0:59

I bet he brags to his friends that he lasts for hours, right?

chikinscratch00 8

Saturday 31 January 2015 1:07

Van der waals forces left

doctorhook86 24

Saturday 31 January 2015 1:58

I voted YDI. You asked, he answered.

Weiss_Schnee 14

Saturday 31 January 2015 1:59

YDI for not knowing basic chemistry.

Rawrshi 25

Saturday 31 January 2015 2:07

Talk nerdy to me.

ohSNAPyall 26

Saturday 31 January 2015 4:38

Not now. I'm on my periodic table.

crushcrusher 33

Saturday 31 January 2015 2:10

did he specified if it'll be a pi bond or sigma bond?

tantanpanda 26

Saturday 31 January 2015 21:34

hopefully it was a network covalent bond. Strong as diamond, literally.

sandrisima 13

Saturday 31 January 2015 2:15

The best fiancé ever ;)

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The Top

Today, I got a call from my boyfriend. He was at the police station for breaking into a model home to hook up with the girl he's been cheating on me with for the past four months. I was his one phone call. He was expecting me to bail him out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 118

You deserved it 3 775

Today, it's been two months since I broke up with my boyfriend. He's been texting me every time he found a bobby pin at his house that belonged to me, saying we should both see it as a sign of us belonging together. If he keeps this up every time he finds one, the texts will probably never stop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 096

You deserved it 880

The Top

Today, I accidentally cut myself with a razor blade on my toe. Not only does it sting really badly, but it reinforces the fact that I have abnormally hairy toes that need to be shaved. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 001

You deserved it 5 184

Today, I had to slowly and very seriously explain to my mother why there is no 'White History Month'. I can't believe we are actually related. FML

I agree, your life sucks 857

You deserved it 315

Today, I'm so broke, I walked into a nursing home and pretended to be a gentleman's son just so I could get some free food "for him". FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 011

You deserved it 6 528

Today, I walked from my friend's wedding to my divorce. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 297

You deserved it 2 208

Today, I got my wisdom teeth taken out. The two male doctors told me they'd give me anesthesia, but when they did, I could still hear them. I heard them talking about my breasts and how flat they were for a 17 year old. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 231

You deserved it 3 462

Today, I received a phone call, angry at me for not calling my dad on Father's Day. When I told her I was at my dad's house, she clarified; she meant her husband of one year, not my actual father who has raised me for the past 25 years. Apparently, he feels "left out." FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 770

You deserved it 1 610

Same thing different taste

Bad timing

Let's say, hypothetically…

Douche

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