Miscellaneous: Today, my friends thought it'd be funny to hold lighters under... - FML

By desertpunk75 - 19/01/2011 03:40 - United States

Today, my friends thought it'd be funny to hold lighters under the smoke alarms while I was sleeping. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 843

You deserved it 3 169

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By meh beard - 18/01/2016 23:42 - Canada - Bowmanville

Today, my roommate thought it was a good idea to set my beard on fire to wake me up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 536

You deserved it 1 599

By Anonymous - 11/01/2015 08:44

Today, my brother woke me up by trying to light my bed on fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 949

You deserved it 2 841

By melonhead - 14/01/2010 08:46 - Australia

Today, my friends thought it would be funny to try and break a watermelon on my head while I was asleep on the couch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 889

You deserved it 3 726

Fire!

By Mel Cluze - 22/10/2019 16:00

Today, my girlfriend and I were spending the night at a hotel. We were awoken at 3 a.m. by the fire alarm. We quickly got dressed, went down the stairs to the reception area… and were told that it was a false alarm. All because some jerk lit a cigarette in his room. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 671

You deserved it 161

By nic - 01/04/2009 20:06 - United States

Today, for April fools I decided to set off the smoke detectors in my friend's apartment while he was sleeping and saran wrap the outside of his bedroom doorway so he would smack into it. Instead, he jumped out the window and broke his leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 741

You deserved it 120 477

Make it stop

By Elephant1718 - 12/06/2013 01:16 - United States - The Dalles

Today, I was looking forward to my only day to sleep-in this month while I'm balancing school and work. I was rudely awakened at 6 am by my sister and her friend trying to make pancakes, burning them, and setting off the fire alarm in my house for half an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 890

You deserved it 3 070

By chinesef000d - 29/08/2009 05:38 - United States

Today, I was sleeping in my apartment when I woke up to the smell of smoke. Alarmed, I ran out to the kitchen to find my roommates trying to put out a fire on the stove. As soon as they saw me, they ran for it, informing me that it was my problem now. They used my good frying pan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 963

You deserved it 3 200

Emergency cooking

By YoshiSqu4d - 31/07/2020 20:01

Today, I managed to set off the smoke detectors while cooking burgers. The cops and fire department showed up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 139

You deserved it 369

By Ep1cF4ce - 26/07/2011 04:03 - United States

Today, I was sleeping like a baby on our living room couch. My older brother and his friends lit my slippers on fire. While I was wearing them. They even took a video. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 098

You deserved it 3 422

By Lea - 16/01/2012 20:18 - Denmark

Today, my kitchen nearly burned down because the fire alarm didn't detect the plumes of smoke wafting through the kitchen. This is the same alarm that wails when I use the toaster. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 660

You deserved it 3 326

Next

Top comments

FYLDeep 25

Wednesday 19 January 2011 9:07

Sounds funny to me.

Janah_the_ENP 0

Wednesday 19 January 2011 9:06

You need some new friends, dude.

Comments

Jaykayfu 0

Wednesday 19 January 2011 10:57

36 - Well maybe they started it first by taking a crap on OP's car, resulting with him putting cellophane on the toilet seats as revenge, and in turn, them messing with the alarm . Come on now, let's think the obvious . For now .

mintcar 9

Wednesday 19 January 2011 10:58

Tomorrow, plan revenge. Kill them, all of them. Wait...no, no, don't do that.

iliketurdles 7

Wednesday 19 January 2011 22:29

this was such a good plan till you had a guilty conscience.

Thanateros 1

Wednesday 19 January 2011 11:04

That IS pretty funny. Lighten up.

loshysucks 0

Wednesday 19 January 2011 11:15

Haha it is funny.

Swedish81 0

Wednesday 19 January 2011 11:37

This is NOT an FML. Laugh it off, suck it up!

FMLoverAgain 7

Wednesday 19 January 2011 11:44

aww

spicyasscakes 0

Wednesday 19 January 2011 11:46

lol when I first read this I thought it said lightsabers

fionapple 0

Wednesday 19 January 2011 11:47

finally，you were waked up, right?

Gemini253 0

Wednesday 19 January 2011 11:48

Your friend is definitely an idiot... I think you should choose new friends.. Maybe smarter ones?

lebronjames6 0

Wednesday 19 January 2011 13:12

really so wat did u do just pull up ur pants and hope u dnt get any doo-doo stains on it!!!!

1
2
3
4
5

Keywords

Poopoo peepee Embarrassing Love Miscellaneous Romantic Christmas Break-ups Annoying Money Gross Argument Ironic Awkward Friends Cute Haircut Lonely Holidays Relatable Work Bosses Capitalism Cars You're fired Covid Health Cheating Jealousy Parenting Kids

The Top

Today, as I exited McDonald's after a quick lunch, a man in a jogging outfit ran past, snatching my handbag right off my shoulder as he tore past. He must have been at least 50. I broke down utterly exhausted before I could chase him even a single block. I'm 24. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 151

You deserved it 39 590

Today, someone burgled my hotel room. As always, I had locked my passport, extra cash, and other valuables in the closet safe, so I thought the losses would be superficial. What a discovery that the safe hadn't been fastened to the closet shelf, so the thief just picked it up and took it home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 111

You deserved it 3 102

The Top

Today, I overheard my grandad complaining that without the winter heating allowance, it’s going to be too cold for him and grandma to get naked for sex, unless they just expose the necessary bits to each other for a few minutes. Props they still get it on in their 70s but still, ew grandad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 315

You deserved it 114

Today, at my niece's christening, I was outside with family when we suddenly heard shouting and the priest pushing my husband outside while screaming, “GET OUT OF MY CHURCH!” Friar Tuck style. It’s been six hours and husband still won’t tell me what he did that upset a priest that badly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 590

You deserved it 127

Today, despite being skinny everywhere else on my body, I have a double chin. FML

I agree, your life sucks 743

You deserved it 145

Today, a large spider climbed inside my lunchbox while my mom was making me sandwiches. She didn't tell me about it until after I got home from school, though, and only because I mentioned a strange aftertaste in the sandwiches. She said she didn't want me to worry over lunch because she knows I hate spiders. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 544

You deserved it 1 068

Today, I removed the side rails from my truck because I didn't think I really needed them. An hour later, I went to Wal-Mart, forgot they were gone, and busted my ass in public while getting out of my truck. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 924

You deserved it 44 308

Today, I woke up on the last day of my vacation at the beach to find that my dog had chewed a hole in the wall of my rented house, 2 hours before the owner arrived to check for any damage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 581

You deserved it 6 790